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lilred

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About lilred

  • Birthday 09/09/1979

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  1. For me vday is the sentiment. i think that if he cooked me dinner, that would be fine too. But basically we're NOT even going to meet up that day at all! And we only live 30 minutes away from each other. Nope, not even somewhere half way for dinner. I'm just frustrated and sad about the whole thing. Come on, isn't that a couple's holiday that one looks forward to if you're in a relationship? I've always gotten some sort of acknowledgement from past bfs.
  2. I don't feel comfortable w/ doing the researching for nice restaurants when it's going to be on HIS dime. I'm still a traditional girl at heart, and pretty much i'm staying it would be really nice if my bf did the majority of the planning. It's more of an effort thing at this point. I'm just asking how's a nice way to let a guy know that it would be nice to have a vday dinner, on vday?---i really don't think that's unreasonable, esp. for our 1st vday together. Well it seems like at least 2 guys agree w/ me here (friscodj and karvala) thanks guys! now i just need some tips to nudge my bf in the right direction!
  3. Yes, I'm paying for the hotels during the days when his company is NOT paying---only cuz priceline has a better deal when you book both airfare and hotel. He did offer to pay for half of my trip, but I'm not like that---you know taking money from a bf is too weird. I mean I can't see myself cashing in a check from my bf. We're in a relationship not business partners. I just thought he would make it up to me in other ways. e.g. gifts, dinner Btw our salarys are almost the same. if that matters. Also practically speaking, i don't really know how much the hotel is in itemized terms. I bought this package deal on priceline and they just give you a lump sum for both airfare and hotel. All I wanted was for him to reciprocate. Pretty much acknowledge the fact that i'm paying a lot of money to spend time w/ him. And for him to be romantic for once. I mean it's our 1st Vday together! How do I get him to understand? (e.g. positive solution.) Any ideas on how i can bring up the fact that it would be nice to celebrate Vday on the actual day? It's one of those holidays that you kinda need to celebrate it that day. I mean it doesn't make sense to send a dozen roses 2 days later right? It's not like i want to guilt him into taking me out for vday---i want him to realize that he's being well... a cheap bastard. But in a tactful way
  4. Since my bf has a business trip to NYC, he asked me to come w/ him over presidents day weekend and make a trip out of it. His flight and the nights that he is staying after I fly back home are on his companys tab. So I have no problem paying my own way. The total cost for myself was over $600 for MY plane ticket AND hotel for the weekend (i won't be staying any of the nights that are comped by his company.) I think he felt bad since I had to shell out that amount of money so to make it up he said "I'll pay for all the meals, and btw lets make this trip our valentines present to each other." Sorry, but i'm like what the heck?! I'm shelling out $600 and you can't even take me to a nice dinner ON valentines, or do something special? I just feel very disappointed. I mean it's our 1st vday together too. It's not like I keep a speadsheet around, but i can't help but feel a bit jipped, I know that he asked me to go w/ him to the trip and I accepted, but I'm paying over 6 bills, and he's just paying for meals? That won't even add up anywhere close to $600. Do you think I'm overreacting? and if not, how can i mention something to him about it, cuz knowing me, I'm just going to brew over it.
  5. Just wondering if I should really let my boyfriend have it if he doesn't plan or get me anything for Valentines day. Also are guys THAT clueless that they wouldn't remember when that day was?
  6. Since you can't turn back time, your time is wasted thinking about the past and what you "would've, could've and should've" done. What you can do is control your own destiny for the future. I think that it would be a great idea to go back, even part time, to school. Maybe the company you work for has tuition reimbursment. The old saying "it's never too old to learn" is true. Getting a degree is beneficial to your future, and you are only 31. Plus you will meet people in your classes, granted that 80-90% will be younger than you, but that doesn't mean you can't create great friendships. On the other hand, you should be thankful that you have a great job, most people don't even have that! And if your goal is to find your husband, I would suggest joining some internet dating sites and even speed dating---and you won't need a degree for that! Seriously though, if you are experiencing depression, you should seek some medical attention, but that should be your last result. Best Wishes.
  7. We really haven't talked about marriage in so many words, just hints like "how would you feel if we lived here? or would you convert to my religion?" but not specifically about marriage. I just don't want to scare him off. Also I don't really care to have a wedding. I would love to elope or go to vegas.
  8. Okay, I know that was a silly question, since I know that you cannot FORCE anyone to propose. I have been dating my BF for a year now and he asked me a few weeks ago "when do you think we'll know?" I took that as a positive thing, meaning that he's thinking about marriage. My question is, is there any topics that I can bring up to him to let him know that I am ready to tie the knot? Yet at the same time I don't want to scare him off. Thanks.
  9. I think your chances are 50/50 if you slept w/ him on the 1st date. Guys still like the chase and being able to wait for a woman before he sleeps w/ her. Even if the chemistry was awesome, you might be giving it up too soon. On the flip side, if the connection is there on a emotional level, then there is a good possiblity that you will continue to be something more than "bed buddies." A good indicator that the relationship would continue is that he would be calling you even though he is out of town visiting family. If he doesn't call you the entire time that he is gone, then I would not really hold my breath.
  10. I think if you are both in the same place in your lives (e.g. both students or both working) then I believe that it the guy should buy the bigger gift. I kinda agree w/ pinkelephant. Which girl doesn't like a generous guy? I know that a BIG turn off character for my girlfriends in a a guy is cheapness. Honestly I would feel a bit bad if I got him a ps 3 t and he got me a microwave (homage to previous posts) : ) I think it's all a part of chivary e.g. opening doors, planning dates, etc..
  11. I'm going to meet my bf parents for the 1st time at his family's xmas party. Do I need to bring something for his parents? And if I do, should I expect him to get something for MY parents thereafter? However, he will probably not meet them in person since they do not live around here. Thanks!
  12. Iceman, it's cool to set a budget for you and your wife, but this is a guy i've been dating for only 6 months? is that still cool?
  13. I've been dating this guy for 6 months. We are both in established careers and make a decent living (e.g. we are both homeowners.) Anyhow, do you think that it's normal for him to ask what our budget is for each other regarding xmas presents? It seems quite unromantic to me plus this is our 1st xmas together. Or is he just cheap?
  14. DN: i don't know if that would be make any sense for me 1) we are still EXes, we are not dating (i feel like i'm more than friends though) 2) i wouldn't have any dignity left if i drove 3 hours to see this guy that possible would not even welcome me wholeheartedly
  15. DN-- yeah--i hate to admit it but i think that all of you are correct--even though i the tardiness was unavoidable, it might seem to him that i was "playing games". I have to say, to my defense, i was unable to check or call him during the meeting, it was a face to face meeting w/ my boss and looking at my phone would seem utterly unprofessional. Obviously, in my ex's eyes, things might have seemed different. He said that he was very disappointed. It was his b-day that weekend and i told him i would take him to a nice dinner, but that had to be scratched also b/c of meetings and dinner w/ the boss. I did apologize to him via voice message, explained my situation and he texted me to say that he was "not mad anymore, just disappointed". What sucks was that b4 i went to this conference, i felt like we were making real progress (e.g. he was calling me everyday and seemed excited to see me)---now after this happened, i haven't heard from him and he sent me a text to tell me that he'll "try to call me later, sometime". Ahh i feel like my progress w/ him is analogus to the story of the big boulder being pushed up that hill: just as you feel like you taxed out your effort, and almost at the top, the boulder just rolls back down to the bottom, and you're right where you started from. Any suggestions to mend my "wrongs" quicker?
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