I get the start of this, and the end in terms of dignity and self worth. I'm over a month in now, and I kind of ended up there by accident. Although she cooled things a month prior, we'd met a couple of times and she was still initiating talk with me. After a couple of attempts to meet were met with what felt like fob offs I was abit short with some responses and kind of left things alone with her, expecting/hoping she'd let me know about meeting like she said. Fast forward a week, no contact and she'd cleared me off her social media. It stung as we hadn't argued at all, I wasn't sure if I annoyed her or she was just cutting me loose. So I was left to continue NC without actually formally having a proper break up or cutting off of contact, which leaves me with a load of unresolved things I want to say and a bunch questions in my own head. And a great urge to reach out. Its probably not a good idea at this point, but I can't stop going over old ground in my head and questioning things I may or may not have done wrong, pointless as it now is. Hopefully in time this will ease. I try not to talk about it too much as I think those around me think I should have moved on more than I have. I'm ok when I'm busy and occupied, which seems to me to be key, but when that all the noise stops I'm back here again, which sucks. Hopefully with a busy period coming up I will not be thinking about all this as much and I'll be picking myself up better
