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soooolost

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  1. But I tried for 4 years to make him see our issues but nothing worked. I could go back but there's point if nothing changes
  2. I came on here to find solace but instead feeling quite upset at the comments. I hope you don't feel half as bad as I do while growing through a break up
  3. My issues with him was around money. He was very cheap with me while I was very generous and eventually that grew into resentment. I spoke to him for years about this but nothing changed. So I was exasperated and broke up. Maybe I made the wrong decision and should have worked on it while still with him but I did try
  4. Thank you LHgirl. I'm glad someone understands Relationships are not always so cut and dry and sometimes are complicated. Did you break up with him because you wanted to? I'm still in NC and not planning to reach out but yes, feeling quite torn and heartbroken
  5. We were each other for 4 years and we argued a lot during the last year over some fundamental problems. I wanted to break up so we can take some time apart and somehow change if not we would be at each other's throat. I still love him and 2 weeks ago, he said he still loves me and hopes for a future together. So instead of trying to work on what went wrong with us, I'm confused as to why he is now active on bumble.
  6. I did talk to him and said we both need to change in order for us to work in the future. Why is everyone being so harsh?
  7. I got on because I heard from a friend that they saw him so wanted to verify
  8. I broke up with my bf of 4 years in July because I felt I needed to due to our issues. We kept in contact after the breakup and it felt as though we never broke up. However, I started expecting things and would overreact when he didn't respond to me in a timely manner and kept asking if he was dating someone else. He got annoyed and stopped responding to my texts for 2 days. I decided to stop the nonsense of questioning him and begging him and went NC. He reached out one day after I went NC to say he still loves and misses me and hopes we can still have a future one day. That was 2 weeks ago and I've been NC since. Today, I get on bumble and I see his profile I feel so heartbroken. How can he say he still loves and misses me yet not do anything about it? And why is he on a dating app? Does this mean he has decided to move on? Does it mean there's no hope of reconciliation?
  9. The thing is you reached out to her mom a couple of days ago. This is not no contact. No contact literally means pulling the plug on any contact with your ex and people closest to her i.e. her mom. I think you should try and take some time to yourself to heal and reset. I know it's hard as I'm going through it but there's no point pushing someone who doesn't want to be with you.
  10. As tough as NC is, it will be the best thing for you. What I learned this past week is if you love someone, you must let them go. I decided last Monday to let my ex go and start the healing process. 8 days of zero contact and I do not have the urge to reach out to him. Yes, I'm sad but I've decided to focus on myself and what I can control. Trust me. Go NC and you'll start feeling better.
  11. You're absolutely right. I think NC has shifted from doing it to make him realize something to doing it for me to heal
  12. Hi Maddie. I'm on day 8 of NC and it's been tough but I'm pushing through. Last week, I had a hard time focusing at work because all I could think about was him and how I drove him away. Although I'm sad, it's getting better because the urge to contact him is not there anymore. He did finally text me back last Tuesday to say I still love you. But that was it and I didn't write back. I also heard he was going out a lot (from mutual friends who have seen him around) so I'm not too sure what to think or how to feel.
  13. Thanks everyone. I get where all of you are coming from. We definitely had our issues but we still had a lot of love between us. It wasn't until I went overboard and started to beg and plea that he backed away slowly and now have stopped all contact. I guess my question is if my behavior drove him away for good? Is this unresponsiveness permanent? I am going to stick to NC because I need to salvage the little dignity I have left and recognize that my behavior for the past 2 weeks was horrible. But I would like to hope that by going NC, he will get his space and hopefully rethink things.
  14. Please help anyone..this is so hard. His unresponsive and silence is killing me
  15. Today is day 1 of NC and I'm feeling lost and confused. I won't reach out to him anymore but all these questions and feelings I have are making me uncomfortable and unsettled. How could he completely shut me out and ignore all my texts/calls when it was only a few weeks ago that he said he still loves me? Did he suddenly stop loving me? How could he not have an ounce of empathy? I was with him for 4 years and we loved each other so much. I just don't understand how can someone can just shut you off. Why didn't he just block me while he was at it??
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