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About Jimbob83

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  1. Hi, just wanted to get some people's thoughts on this... So I went back onto online dating a couple of months ago after taking a long break from it. Matched with a girl, went on a date which went pretty well, exchanged phone numbers at the end, and later arranged to go for a second date a week or so later. The day of the second date she pulls out as she is 'tired'. I was a bit annoyed as I had used annual leave to book the day off work (she didn't know this and said she felt terrible about it later). The first date I thought had gone ok, she might have pulled out because she was tired,
  2. I’m only in the area for a few weeks and this didn’t seem to faze her or put her off when we were messaging and planning the date etc so that may have meant I made the wrong assumption about what she was after. That said, I have to admit I had a serious lack of judgement with her boundaries and if I could take it back I would. Believe me when I say I am ashamed of myself. I cringe when I read my opening post. I know I was well over the line of what is acceptable. I have been kicking myself ever since. I just don’t feel like myself at the moment. I knew before I went that I am not in the rig
  3. So got myself a little situation, not the biggest deal in the grand scheme of things admittedly but something that I have lost some sleep over and would appreciate some insight… So I am recently out of a long relationship and decided to go on Tinder, out of boredom, loneliness, curiosity, maybe a combination. Got chatting to a nice woman, same age as me, lived nearby, texting flowed back and forth etc Didn’t say what I was ‘looking’ for (as I don’t really know myself) but was completely honest about everything. I asked her out for a drink and she said yes. We met on the evening in questi
  4. Yep. Years. He is on the other side of the world, she met him 15 years ago whist she was travelling. Since then they have been on/off contact, mainly email/messages I think. She used him as an emotional crutch and for attention. She kept this going covertly throughout the last 7 years when we have been together. I had never heard of this guy until I found a load of messages she had forgotten to delete last year. Wrote a post on this forum when I found out. Everyone said to break up with her. I left the home for about a week. She begged me to come back so we could try and save our relati
  5. So I've posted here a few times, don’t want to re-tread old ground but basically 7 year relationship, ran into problems a couple of years ago, amongst other issues (money problems with the new house, living with her parents etc) found she had been emotionally cheating for years with an old flame of hers I didn’t even know existed. That was about a year ago. Then a few months ago and I let a girl I was getting attention from come between us (texted a few times, nothing physical. In fact didn’t even meet her). But on top of everything else it got into my head and I told my GF I wasn’t happy, we
  6. She was actually more average size/weight when I first met her, which I was fine with. We didn’t get together until about a year later, at which point admittedly she had gotten overweight. Yes I thought I could get her back to how she was when we first met. Maybe that was my mistake. But it was with the best of intentions. She does want to lose weight, and I have done basically everything possible to help her with this aim. 100% agree that she is not neglecting herself, she is not a slob. We both work hard. We enjoy taking the dog for long walks together. She just doesn’t have the same dedi
  7. I’m afraid I can’t lay claim to looking like Chris Hemsworth. And I am by no means perfect. I don’t care about a flat stomach and I don’t mind a bit overweight. I just don’t want an obese girlfriend/wife/partner. It isn’t healthy. That’s just my view. Different people find different things attractive, I get that. Different people also have their own ‘line in the sand’ or whatever you want to call it when it comes to a potential partner and how overweight they may or may not be. I realised I was opening a potential can of worms by addressing this topic, but I genuinely do not mean any disres
  8. Its not that I’m completely against having children like some people are. I just want the woman I have kids with, marry and spend the rest of my life with to be as near perfect a match with me as possible. We need to be compatible life partners. With her it is so close, as I say we only really diverge on the fitness/weight issue which makes me think that there might be other people out there that are more compatible with me at this stage of my life. Someone with the same outlook and values etc. I would love it if this issue didn’t bother me in the slightest, and I know there are some peopl
  9. So where to begin. Was in a 7 year relationship. Things were going fine for the first few years then we hit some problems, she was emotionally cheating on me for years with a guy in another country she had met before we got together (as detailed in a previous thread), she begged me to not leave her, cancelled all his contact info etc and we stayed together (against some good advice I received on this forum) but we never quite regained the trust we had before. We moved into a new house a couple of years ago and have spent a lot of time doing it up but the money ran out so we were living in a
  10. Thanks for your reply DancingFool. Really helps to get some perspective from someone 'outside' looking in. It may have been a fake number of course, only thing that is a bit strange was that she gave it out without me asking for it? (ie "have my number...."), why would she go to the trouble of doing that if you were going to just break contact and go all silent anyway? Surely you just wouldn't give your number out, no reason to hand it out as I hadn't asked for it? Also after giving me the "number" she tried to video call me that same night, I couldn't take the call at the time though so n
  11. Hi just after some advice, bit of an odd situation. Was in a 7-year relationship which ended a while ago due to various issues (posted about this last year). It was an amicable split, we are still getting on and are still living together until the house is sold as neither of us can afford to move out whilst still paying mortgage etc. We own the house together, not married, no children. Typically, a girl I have always liked got in touch not long after my ex and I agreed to part ways. Hadn’t seen her for about 18 months, or had any contact for around a year, so was a bit out of the blue. Alw
  12. Thanks for all your views on this. Really helps getting some outside perspective. I've left the home for the time being, gone to stay with a friend. Create a bit of distance so I can think. Thespainatlaw... I respect your opinion if you think I am over reacting. But I do not agree with you. And if you had been dishonest and then been found out, you would dump your boyfriend because he didn't believe you or trust you? After you had been sneaking around so long? That doesn't really make sense to me.
  13. Been with my girlfriend almost 7 years. Had a few ups and downs like any relationship I suppose. We moved into our second home together last year. We almost broke up prior to that as we were living with her parents and it put a lot of strain on our relationship, but we talked it through and decided to stay together. Recently I had a suspicion that something was a bit off. Looking at some photos of our holidays on her ipad I came across a couple of selfies she had taken last year. I thought it was strange as she never takes selfies, she does not use FB or social media. One of the selfies she
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