ownmyown

You are treading in dangerous waters with the ex of. Have you ever thought that she initiated contact with you because she was unhappy? Seem's as if she manipulated the situation and took advantage of your vulnerability for her own gain. Showing her condolences was acceptable, but the mere fact that you are married with a child and one on the way should have halted further contact with you. Please do not get caught up in her web. If she was unhappy in her marriage, she needs time alone. You would only be a temporary fix. My failed relationship has caused me to reach out to many in my past; guys that I have not thought about in years. I want a familiar love…something comfortable. This is dangerous, and I am using them to make myself feel better. It's wrong. Take some time to enjoy your children and rediscover your wife; you married her for a reason, hopefully it was love. If you are not satisfied in your marriage, move on at the appropriate time.

Another issue that I'm dealing with is how this hurt both of our families. The wedding was scheduled for the day after Thanksgiving, and it has devastated everyone. I wish I could take all the pain away from my parent. They don't know the full scope of the issues that we had, they are confused??? I've tried to be brutally honest with my parents about my behavior, but they seem to think he is still wrong for waiting until this late in the game to let it out. They say, "You've always been a bully"...why now? I want to defend his actions, but I do not want to discount how they feel. My parents are "old school", love conquers all...time will heal all pain...if you love one another it will all work out. I see the errors of my ways, and I want to make it work if he is willing, but I'm scarred that I won't get the support from my family in the future.

This is difficult, I'm going through something similar....I too wish my ex would have shared his feelings with me 1 or 2 years ago. The part about him being mean is a defense mechanism that is used to justify his actions. If he is suddenly not the person you knew and loved, he is putting on another face to assist him in sticking with his decision and to make you angry with him. It's hard, especially if you thought the relationship was good, and now these feelings come out of nowhere. It almost feels as if the entire relationship was lye, because you do not know when his feelings for you changed, or if he was ever really honest. Be strong...I am there with you.

My fiancé and I were due to be married in a matter of days. Three weeks ago, after a fight, he decided that the wedding was off. We had been in similar altercations during our three-year relationship, but we always seemed to work it out. But three weeks before we are to say "I Do", he decides that he's had enough!!! Enough of what? We'll I tend to get a little aggressive during fights, and at times have attempted to hit him, but was never successful. He has never hit me back, but he'd storm out and go to his mother's house. I would apologize, say that I am sorry and try to explain to him why I did it. I explained to him that this behavior stemmed from a few things: 1. PMS 2. Being in an abusive relationship years back 3. Seeing my parents fight from time to time as a child We have discussed the aforementioned on sever occasions, even before he proposed and he seemed willing to work with me. I however, never attempted to get counseling to deal with my rage. We always seemed to sweep each incident under the rug. After this last fight, he stated that he does not want to begin a life with me until my aggressive behavior ends. He will not agree to postpone or even think about a new date. He says he needs time to "HEAL", and then we can work on the relationship. Now here I am, broken hearted, my parents are devastated (not to mention all of the money they spent on the wedding), and he is mad at me. Is he right to break it off now, after we have invested so much time in the relationship and wedding the planning. These fights were random, once a month or so…not always to the point of me becoming physically aggressive, but we did argue a lot. We were both under a lot of stress, but I figured these things would change after we became financially stable and were able to buy a home. Is this his way of telling me he was never happy? I am seeking professional help to deal with my issues. I really lost now.... I amlost feel like I'm going crazy Should I trust him if he allowed this to fester for three years and then break it off three weeks before the wedding? Oh, and his bachelor party was in Vegas...He went!!! What should I do?