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  1. I am 17 and last year realised that I liked girls (I am a Girl) however I only realised because I started crushing on one of my best friends who is Bi.. I don't live in a very open minded comunity and I can't actually talk to anyone about it. My group of friends consisted of me my Best friend, the girl I started crushing on, and another girl. The other girl and my crush had a problem and my crush moved away from my group due to this. Since then I found out that my crush does NOT like me in that way but she has no idea i love her.(Long story) all this happened when I came out to her about liking girls. Then i decided not to tell her my feelings and kept all this inside me. I also came out to the other girl and my best friend and they know my crush. I instead moved away from my crush in an attempt to get over her. I started avoiding her alot and i didnt think she would notice. I found out just this week that she thinks I hate her and thats why I am avoiding her. I feel like such a jerk for doing this to her (everyone ditches her and now me too). So I decided to start talking to her again today and I was sort of sure that I was over her (I did avoid her for like 3 months). I thought i was over her but then I got to know that she likes someone else and I feel like crying because I am still not over her and I keep lying to myself. I cant tell her cause my group is slowly fixing back and my best friend and the other girl have expressed their feelings to me that If I did tell her it would ruin the group again and the both of them dont want me to tell her. I understand their points and agree to a certain extent but keeping it to myself is not fixing it or helping me get over her. Pls help me. How do I get over her COMPLETELY without telling her or avoiding her...? Ps. It has been a whole year since this crush started and she is my first real crush.
  2. So this is more of a question. Im a female and quite recently i came out to 3 close friends about being bi and they were very accepting and stuff. 1 of which was the girl I am crushing on(The other 2 know its her). I told her first while TRYING (failed) to tell her that i liked her and well that was a whole nother thing (It was my previous thread) I nvr did get to tell her my feelings for her but she sort of gave me an answer. When i told her i had a crush on a girl she responded with "as long as its not me or that would RUIN another FRIENDSHIP". So yeah I didnt tell her after cause it was no point I had my answer. I had to spend a lot of time with her today with a third person. But this friday I will have to spend alot of time with her alone. I am trying my best to get over her but i was crushing on her for a year now and it is kinda difficult to get over someone who is kinda touchy and doesnt realise it and someone who is one of my closest friends. I really do want to get over her but I cant no matter what I try I always think of her again. Its frustrating when I cant control all these emotions. At first the biggest reason I didnt tell her was because her life is very complicated and messy and me telling her would make it worse.(she has said that having me around to talk about these things is nice cause she doesnt really trust anyone else.Me telling her would change that) 2 reason was because she n I are in the same friends group (4). What makes me want to tell her now is because all these have changed. She has a new very close best friend she could talk to. And she has moved away from our friend group( other reasons). It has been 2 months since she told me that me having a crush on her would ruin the friendship and now I am determined to get over her after this friday. If I tell her my feelings atleast she will stop being touchy and I can can peace knowing Its over for good. But I know her reaction and I might just lose a really good friend. If i dont tell her i have to live in silence about my feelings and keep feeling hurt when she does certain things till my feelings EVENTUALLY die off. And I get to keep my friend. To summarise if I tell her I will get closer and get over it but lose a friend in the process. If dont tell her I have deal with always being hurt due to the feelings but I get to keep my friend. If I tell her or dont tell her after this Friday I want to live with my deccsion. Do I tell her how I feel (to get over her but lose a friend) or Do I Keep it to myself(to keep on getting hurt but keep my friend)?????DO I TELL HER OR NOT?
  3. Firstly I am a girl. So about sometime last year I was struggling with my sexuality and at the end of it I figured out that I am Bisexual. It all started when I had a huge crush on a girl(lets call her Jen) I was really close to this girl and lets just say that it took me about a year to realise I was crushing on her and realise I liked her in that way and that started to a chain of emotions and so on but I thought I wasn't gonna tell her although I know she is bi herself. I have not come out to anyone yet and decided that when the time is right I will tell Jen about all of it and how even if she doesn't like me I want our friendship to stay the same. Our friendship is the main reason why I haven't come out yet. So today both of us had alot of time together and she joked that I was checking out guys and when I laughed and denied it she jokingly said "no instead 'my name' likes girls "(she is completely unaware of me being bi) I answered her with "wat if I say yes?" I wanted to see what she thought of me if so. And to my joy she said that be fine too and somehow I felt brave to tell her all of it today. So I went for it. I said I had a crush on a girl and before I could tell her that I liked her she Imediatly said she didnt mind me liking girls as long as it wasnt her or it would ruin our friendship ( she has had horible friendships before where those ppl just ruined their frienship with her and I have been through all that with her). she didn't say it directly and said it casually as if she was sure it wasnt her. I swear I just froze and didnt know what to say really and she didnt stop there she just had to ask who my crush was and I being the talkative mess I am had started blurting out that that I had a crush from last year and when she asked if my crush was from our school I said No then I said Yes (Im not very sure wat I said but I was just a mess) I didnt tell her that she was my crush and honestly I dont want to ever try to tell her since she said that if I had a crush on her it might ruin our friendship. Ughhh I honestly donno watta say to her .do I try to tell her and risk it or just keep the friendship? But the friendship alone means alot to me. WHAT DO I DO?
  4. Sorry in advance for this being a long post. So i am a female and i am having some issues with this boy that i considered a friend. This boy is being a class-A jerk and it is very annoying. I am usually a person who doesnt get angry fast and generally avoids conflict of any sort but when forced into a situation where i have no other option i stay silent and ignore the person to end the conversation fast. But when i have had enough i will blow up. (make extremely sarcastic, not rude but very insulting comments in a very fake nice voice that can annoy anyone. My close friends who know about this side of me call that side the sassy side) This boy and I are both in the same class but he is one year older to me due to the fact that he is from the remove class which means he had to repeat a year. I dont think this affects anything because there is another girl who was in remove class that i am very close to in my group of friends.( 4 ppl including me, all girls). This boy lets call him Bob. This boy has caused problems in my group of friends previously but we manage to distant ourselves from him. Somehow this boy keeps coming back to my group and me and my friends all dont want him near but we dont want to be mean and tell him to get out. This was nvr the reason i hate him. This is y i hate him: 1. Bob and i are both in the prefects board and we both have positions.My possition is the possition that will become the head of the board and Bobs possition is the lowest place that means that he is only able to get the head of group leaders place but i have nvr looked down on him ever. But to move up our places we go through an interview. I was actually not interested in becoming the head and was going to reject the post an Bob really wanted to be the head and this was not a problem for me but many ppl disliked this idea. I did not mind it until the point that Bob became very controlling and bossy. I hated the fact that he was behaving this way but didn't care much. Until the day of the interview when me and him got in a huge argument outside the room and it ended in him shoutting F*** O** u F****** bullter. (he curses alot but i nvr curse) i usually dont mind him cursing but that day it was at me. I avoided saying anything in the argument but it left me pissed off at him. 2. I decided to apologize if i said anything out of the way during the argument the next week. Most ppl would have said its fine and they are sorry too but Bob was a jerk. It was not like he was innocent infact he was wrong for cursing and starting the argument in the first place i barely said anything, i honestly just ignored him most of the time. Instead of apologising he decided to lecture me about how i should watch my mouth when i said barely anything. I didnt say anything and pretended like i could not hear him. Many ppl said that wat he did was very rude and i should have told him off. But i didnt. 3.He has even made fun of my culture and i did not want to insult his religion because i respect his religion because i have other friends of the same religion who are the nicest ppl on earth. 4. Today itself me and my friends (girls all who dont like bob) were talking about something when he came in the conversation and it was a personal topic between us 4 not including him. I told him no one asked you and u know this is a personal topic so y are you interfereing when even James (another boy who is actually close to us) is minding his own business. He said it is a free world. I answered yes it is but this area is known as our personal space so please get out of it. He said owhh u need space i know since ur very "big" (i am abit fat i know) ( he is fit but an ass) i answered him back saying i am fat i know but u see i can diet. U are stupid and u cant do anything about that. I know being mean to some like this is bad but i had just had enough of him and i dont even consider him a friend anymore so he has no right to insult, tease, or even comment on me. How do i distant myself from this person and how do i hit him where it hurts. Because during the argument he said many things that are out of the way and my other friends have told me that some times he makes fun of ppl because of their body. This boy just irritates me sooo much and i will not hesitate to shout at his face if he ever makes fun of me or my friends. Should i hold this grudge? Is it worth it? And how do i behave with this boy so that i can treat him a hundred times worse than he has treated anyone.
  5. I know this is a late reply but i want to tell you that i am a 16 year old girl living in southeast asia . And all that i state here is my perspective.Your stepdad is in love with your mother deeply that he cant stand to see her get upset because of u n ur sister. But he cares for both of you girls because of your mother. I mean he did stop u from committing suicide. N the fact that he yelled at you for talking a language he doesnt understand is only because he feels excluded even in your own family and that can be frustrating.(i should know it happens to me alot but only among friends and that itself is so frustrating) This man is not evil it is the way that he came into your life that makes him feel like a bully. I dont think someone can be intentional that mean but talking to him is NOT an option because based on your story he is egoistic and will not accept being told he is wrong. But none of this means that you are wrong. You are NOT wrong. Stop blaming yourself. Your mom sounds emotional and i think that u should STOP telling her any arguments or tense situations involving your real dad cause it makes the situation bad n plus its none of her business.(dont say that to her). Be picky about wat u n ur sister tell her. U said u 2 were picked up at the airport that means that you 2 should discuss n agree on wat to tell ur mom n wat not to tell. N in every situation try be a ppl pleaser tell her a thing u did with ur dad then tell her that it was fun but not as fun as hanging wif her. I suggest do the above if you CANT stay with another relative. When u go to school find the teacher that seems cool n u feel u can talk to then go up to her/him after class n say that u need help. Explain to the teacher that u cant talk things out with your parents n it only makes things worse. Trust me i never follow the rules in school but i had one teacher that really gave me the best thing in my life that i still appreciate today, it didnt cost money but it changed my entire life. No teacher will walk up to u n ask if u have a problem YOU HAVE TO WALK UP TO THE TEACHER AND JUST TALK. (someone will save you n hope u find that person soon) . You are amazing. Good luck. Ps. Try writing a book. Not jk jus do it but not about ur life twist n turn the story
  6. I feel that if you want to get over him i would suggest to look for certain habits or behaviors that he has that you dislike. (something that you dont want in a guy you want to date. Make sure it is NOT something general or you will start to dislike him even as a friend) Even the smallest of things can help you get over him. But keep these small dislikes to yourself or it might get messy.
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