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  1. Thanks for your sound advice. It's nice to hear someone say "have a go, what have you got to lose" for a change. Often in these boards and real life people say under no circumstances go back but I think it's easy to say when you are not in the position. And I would much rather see what happens then always wonder... nothing worse then regret. I guess as you said your experience was a little bit muddy but life is all about living and different experiences, be good or bad, I think it makes you a richer person. I feel like now I know ill at least give it a shot and see what happens having no great expectations but st least the chance for a little more understanding and possibly closure if all :)
  2. Yes your right, fantasy are limited. Time to sort this thing out one way or another, 2.5 years of emotional energy spent on it think it deserves to be looked into, don't want to be posting the same thing on here in another few years! Time to nip it in the bud once and for all. And if it stings I'll get over it, better then being stuck in limbo which in the long run is a lot more painful.
  3. I'm sorry to hear that this has happened to you, but I'm glad you wrote in because it gives me something to think about. I wouldn't do very well if that happened to me, especially after all this time. He did state in his messages he wanted to see me in any way he could, and that friendship was a great starting point if that is all I was up for. Obviously i don't know what I'd want either if I did see him again, for his age (35) he doesn't have much going for him, I would like to meet someone that is ambitious and he isn't, I don't know it's so hard...
  4. Hmm interesting question.. that made me think, I'm not enjoying it however the though of meeting up and it not working out will quash any fantasies in my head, but the benefit in that would be moving on with my life fully I guess and no "what ifs" which is no way to live. I'm 32 and he's 35, but I guess maturity wise i know we probably seem like teenagers.
  5. Thanks for your advice, that is along the lines what I think as well. The relationship wasn't up and down it was mainly a lot of fun and laughter, it was just when a jealous ex of mine got involved and spread some false rumours caused all the trust issues. He wanted to speak on the phone I guess maybe that would be the best next step to gauge how he seems without the huge step of meeting face to face. I do find it hard to fathom he still thinks of me. I don't know I think I will wait and see if he contacts me again and go from there...?
  6. About 2.5 years ago. Messy because he didn't trust me..
  7. My ex of over two years with whom I had a messy break up with reached out to me. He had tried a few times over the years but I thought it better to not engage in contact with him so I could move on but never did. I thought about him every day even when dating other guys and I know he has had gfs in that time too. However recently I realised how I haven't met anyone that made me feel like he did and doubt I ever will and then a few days later he contacted me saying he would like to reconnect if I'm up for it and has thought of me daily since we broke up and if not all good. I said I think we should leave the past in the past now I feel sad as I wanted him to contact me sooooo badly then when he did I got scared, not sure I could go through that pain again. I'm not sure what to do, I feel like like I'm stagnating in my life and not sure why I always still think of him so many years later,I guess when I was with him I felt like the happiest person in the world and it's been hard to find somekne to make me feel like that again. I don't know what to do. Everyone says leave it and don't go back there but I don't want to have the burden of regret hanging over me at the same time?
  8. I'm not sure I'm following, what Changes should I make?
  9. It's good to hear someone else feels the same, so many people move on so quickly I wish I could find someone that easily. I have taken breaks but I'm not getting any younger so don't want to keep putting it off too much more. Hopefully I do find that someone!
  10. I have an online account I use on and off but most the people that message me are without sounding rude "desperate" and send out mass generic emails and sometime I reply because I don't want to be rude when it seems like it's not a generic email then get stuck talking to them for ages when I'm not even remotely interested in them, I would love to meet someone who makes me excited and for them to feel the same way!
  11. Thanks for your lengthy response. What your saying makes sense, I guess if I stopped being friends with my best friend I'd miss her also. I guess also in a way asking this question kind of shows that I don't miss them specifically if I have to even ask if it's them I miss. I'm just lonely and look at my empty phone and it makes me sad. It's good to know the things you liked you now don't like I think that would make it a lot easier to stop missing them.
  12. Yes I think I would forget about the person if I met someone awesome, but I haven't. I think I am just lonely then :(
  13. How do you know if you miss someone because you are lonely or because you genuinely miss the person? Like the quote "you miss the idea of them" how do you tell if it's them you miss or the idea of them?
  14. Tuna010


    Thankyou and yes I've learnt now it's probably wiser to just talk about where things are then going off the deep end like I did, but lesson wel and truly learnt, plenty more fish in the sea!
  15. Tuna010


    Yes I agree with all what you have said. I have deleted and blocked and put and end to that chapter. Thanks for putting it into words I couldn't quiet put it into myself.
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