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Everything posted by joyce

  1. Thanks all. To put it simply, I was "not in the right headspace" the other night when I wrote this post 😂. I definitely overinvested, I've found that the current circumstances with the pandemic and everything have made it hard not to do so (extra lonely, bored and lots of time to text, craving excitement, etc.). Plus, I'm fresh out of a FWB situation in which I learned the hard way that casual stuff and physical connection alone isn't my cup of tea. So when he started sharing some deeply personal stuff and texting me A LOT right off the bat, I interpreted it as someone open, honest, emotionall
  2. I’ve been talking to this guy I met online for a week and everything’s been going swimmingly. He initiates a lot of texts and we’ve talked quite a bit every day since we met. We had a video date a few days ago and had an in person date planned for this weekend. He’s seemed very interested the whole time and has been very mature and lovely to me. Well, yesterday we were texting throughout the day like usual. Towards the evening, he asked how my day was and it took me a couple hours to answer because I was busy with other things. When I did answer, he immediately came back with “I want to t
  3. You're completely right, thanks :) After all, I did take almost a full day to answer one of his texts a few days ago because I was very caught up in school and work. I would hope he didn't overthink that as much as I'm overthinking this!! I have a nasty habit of reading into these things, which is why I usually prefer to limit texting conversations in the first place.
  4. Thanks all! I wholeheartedly agree that texting is basically useless, especially in this instance. I also really love your netflix analogy, bluecastle. I guess I just want to clarify one thing...you all suggest I focus on meeting in person, figure out a time to see him, suggest coffee, etc. Like I said I strongly prefer in person interactions so of course that is what I want and where I was hoping all this texting would lead. So should I perhaps give it a week or so (since I don't know when he'll be back), then try suggesting meeting again sometime later next week if I still feel like it at
  5. Two weeks ago my friend set me up with this guy she knows from high school. We texted for a few days then went on a date and it was fun! He seemed quite into me on the date, and afterwards he told my friend that he liked me and thought I was really cool. He also texted me right after and told me he had a good time and suggested he’d like to do it again soon. Unfortunately he had to leave town the day after our date to go see his parents for a week, but I felt pretty confident he would ask me out again when he got back. Now, I am not the biggest texter, especially when I’m first getting to
  6. Hmm. Definitely lots to think about here. I'll admit, I don't know if I really buy into the whole "dumpee should NEVER reach out to the dumper first" perspective. Obviously I agree in extreme situations like manipulation, cheating, abuse, etc...But that's not the case here and there's a lot more context to our unique personalities, the dynamic during the 2 months we dated, the way the "breakup" occurred, and the changes I've encountered individually over the last 6 months since we've spoken than I can include in a brief internet post. So I appreciate and understand the sentiment, but respectfu
  7. Well….I was hoping no one would ask for specifics lol. I am the “dumpee” in this situation. Like I said, the breakup was very quick and on good terms and we had a super fun and healthy relationship the entire time prior. However, at the time of the breakup I had politely requested that he not contact me again afterwards because I didn’t want to be friends, and he promised to respect that. Now, 6 months later, I’m thinking back on this great thing we had going and now that some circumstances have changed in both of our lives I’m wondering if we could make it work. We already know the connect
  8. Let’s say you briefly dated someone in your past (think ~2 months, start to finish), things were going pretty great and the interest was mutual, but you ultimately decided to end things before a serious relationship was established. Let's say your reasons for ending things weren’t super serious like major incompatibility, signs of toxic behavior, or anything like that. Instead, your reason was something like feeling relationship anxiety/insecurity at the time, not feeling ready to be in a relationship at that exact time, being too busy at the time to maintain a relationship, etc. So mostly rig
  9. hahaha I guess it kind of does! I haven't heard from him today...is that a bad sign? I'm not used to meeting guys out so I don't know how soon I should expect a text from him if he's actually interested. I also am a bit thrown that he insisted on me texting myself so I'd have his number too because now I feel like if he was even slightly doubtful that I was into him he'd be equally justified in waiting for me to text him..I don't want to chase him though.
  10. Almost exactly a year ago I was out with my friends at college and met this really cool guy. We talked and danced for most of the night and ended up kissing a few times. He was super cool and I was really into him, but I was leaving to study abroad in a week, so obviously it was just a one night thing and that was it. When I got back from study abroad 6 months later and went back to my home college, I definitely still remembered him because it was such a good night, but seeing as it had been so long ago I felt like he wouldn’t remember who I was. I saw him every now and then at various plac
  11. I was seeing this guy over the summer for a few weeks. We went on a few awesome dates, and he was giving me every sign that he was super into me. When I left town to go back to school, he told me he really wanted to keep in touch and wanted to try to visit each other periodically throughout the semester. We kept texting every day, and were flirting a ton. After about a month of that, he ended up asking if we could just be friends. I didn’t want to lose him completely so I agreed, but backed off so he could determine the dynamic of how it would work. He continued texting me almost every day,
  12. I had a very short thing with this guy I work with over the summer and on breaks. We only managed to go on two dates before I had to leave to go back to school, but they were both amazing and we had really great chemistry. Once I left he started texting me every day and flirting really boldly, and even straight up told me he was into me so it became clear he liked me. Randomly after about a month of being really into each other and texting all the time, he went silent for a few days. When I confronted him and asked what was up, we talked on the phone and he confessed to me that he had alway
  13. I met this guy over the summer at a seasonal job and we instantly hit it off. He was super cool and we had the same quirky sense of humor. I’m really shy and introverted and don’t usually connect with people quickly, but with him it was immediate. We went on a few dates and they went super well. We ended up spending entire days together just talking about everything. He always texted me after telling me how he had such a good time and loved spending time with me. He started getting really forward with me over text. He was super flirty, straight up told me he was really into me, was alw
  14. I was seeing a guy for about a month and we were both super into each other when he suddenly completely backed off. When I asked him why, he informed me that there was some emotional stuff he had to work through and because of that felt it best that we only be friends for now. His reasoning (which I won’t go into because it would be too long) was all really valid and he practically BEGGED me to stay friends with him because he didn’t want to lose me, so I agreed, even though I have romantic feelings for him. Before anyone suggests it, I will just get it out of the way that I am 99.999% confide
  15. Definitely not in a relationship. We run in kind of the same circle (since we worked together) so I think he would've been more secretive if that were the case. The dates we went on were very public and we even ran into people we knew. Plus I know he's told his friends about me. So I really don't know what's up.
  16. He's supposed to be coming in a week. So I figured if he hadn't said anything by Wednesday I would send him one last text to confirm if he's still coming. I really don't think he would've gotten that impression from the conversations we've had. When we were making the plans I let him know that I had a roommate and that she will be home. We share a bedroom, so it was clear nothing like that would happen. I don't think I really overdid it in saying I was attracted to him . . . I said it maybe once or twice just in passing about how great I thought he was. We've had twice as many conversa
  17. That was one of the first things I thought of, which is why I texted him right away when he hadn't responded in 24 hrs. I figured maybe he wanted me to initiate for once, but obviously he still didn't answer. Also the more I thought about it the more I realize that probably wasn't it. I definitely showed him that the interest was mutual. I expressed excitement about his visit, planned it all out, told him multiple times that I really liked him, and told him I was attracted to him. I would've initiated more had I been given the chance, but like I said, he was texting me every day by early a
  18. I met this guy at my summer job about two months ago. We became “work friends” but then a week before I left he asked me out. We went out and had an amazing time. We quickly made plans to hang out again before I left and it went great again. He texted me immediately afterwards both times to let me know how much he enjoyed spending time with me. Right before I left he told me he was really going to miss me, and that he wanted to keep seeing/talking to each other since my school isn’t actually that far (~2 hour drive). When I got to school he started texting me every day, just chatting and as
  19. I posted about a week ago about this guy I like at work. We get along really well and I had kind of been trying to coax him to ask me out, but nothing was really happening. I thought for a bit about asking him out myself (I've done it before and don't think there's anything wrong with the girl asking the guy out) but eventually decided that enough signs of interest just weren't there and it would be better to just cut my losses. Anyway, I continued to be friendly with him obviously but figured there was never going to be that mutual interest so I kind of gave up those romantic hopes. A few
  20. I have this guy I like at work but I’ve been having trouble gauging how he feels about me. We’ve had plenty of one on one conversations together now and he seems to genuinely enjoy talking to me. We both work pretty much every day, and we usually have one or two conversations per shift. I’m just having trouble telling if I’m getting a friendly vibe or an interested vibe. I feel like I catch him glancing at me a lot from across work, but then again there’s not that many places to look so I could be making that up. I also sometimes feel like he’s a bit nervous around me because he tends to rambl
  21. Okay, long back story here that I’ll try to make brief. I fell hard for this guy last semester, but knew I was going to be studying abroad this semester. He didn’t want to do long distance for various reasons which I understood, so we tried to be friends. He still treated me like a girlfriend, but would shoot me down if I would bring up dating again or expect too much from him. Amidst finals, working through some anxiety, and getting ready to go abroad I just couldn’t handle it. I told him I needed to be apart from him for the time being, explained all my reasoning, and told him I’d love to ca
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