gab444

Thanx guyz i agree with you guyz and i think the reason why she feels so much hurt is bcos she gave me her all except for her trust but i still let her down so shez upset with me with the same amount of love she has and that can be a very tough thing i can't wait to know that shez ok again

Thanx quid , Talking about forceing myself on her i really dont know what to say she said i forced myself on her and if i can remember we were both nude and she said stop and pushed me away and started crying i was so confused i became sober, and i apologized immedaitly telling her i was carried away I stopped blaming things on achohol but i knew we were playing with fire and we could get burnt which was exactly what happened. i really blame myself for that cos i could have stopped things when i had the chance. She asked for time and i've decided to give it to her but i'm trying to forgive myself and move on with my life but the truth is that i really loved this girl and i wish her all the best. i just want to stop thinking about her

I hope after saying this i will feel better from the respones i get. I meet my Ex about 6months ago and it just looked to me like she was my final stop in terms of who to spend the rest of my life with. she told me everything about her past which made me even apprecaites more. for me i have been more of the church guy that doesn't believe in pre marital sex and we discussed this before we started going out. i told her my limits even though i hadn't tried them before but i was willing to flex out a little bit since lack of romance could ruin a relationship, but everytime we played around i felt bad but i didn't want to make her feel bad by showing the way i felt about it. i tried telling her once that we should control things but it just didn't work so things kept on happening and i was getting closer to losing it. we had a problem that we were trying to get over which was clearly my fault and i tried everything possible to resolve things but it was just hard bcos she tells her mum everything and her mum will always try to protect her which is not a wrong thing but it puts me on edge. i told her we should always try to resolve thing ourselves before involveing other but her mum was always the first to hear about everything. what finally broke the camels back was when we went out for dinner and i had a little to drink which made me a little bolder that usual and we got home and started our usual thing but i could not control myself and things happened she told me to remember my vows but i was too confused to hear and she pushed me off and i became sober and cried like a little boy not bcos i lost my virginity but bcos i was that careless with someone i love so much she cried and called me names and said i was just like everyone else despite that fact that i never pressured her for sex for one second right now i feel all the guilt in the world and dont know if i can forgive my self bcos i betrayed her trust, not intentionally but i should not have being that careless. she still claims she loves me but we just can't be together again i still love her very much and wish we get back together but i dont know what to think. shez seeing some esle right i think she intimate with the guy she claims she was trying to get over the whole episode with the guy but she had a little problem with the guy and he asked for 4weeks break. she called me crying and i went there to make sure she was ok not knowing she was crying bcos he asked for a break but i handle it well by not letting that affect me cos i really wanted her to be ok. it looked like we were getting back together but she just comes up with something and i become a monster again the guy came back after four weeks and our date was canceled for something she claimed i did. i didn't call her for a week cos i was fedup of the whole thing but i called a day after Thanksgiving to wish her Happy Thanksgiving and she called back saying she was picking herself up after i stopped calling and my calling again is breaking her apart and she's ready want to deal with me so i should stop calling and give her time. she said she loves me and she hung up what am i pls someone should help me

Thanx cryssi i also agree with you about me feeling equally hurt it's horrible i feel like crap cos i still have feeling for her and i know i shouldn't i wish i could just go away. i can't wait to get over her i deserve better that what i'm crying for.

Guyz, i'm back again but not feeling too good with myself. i wish i had done the NC rule bcos trying to make things work ended up making me feel like a used blanket. We've really being trying to get along but her hurt keeps coming up and i clearly understand why, she told me she needed some space which i gladly agreed to give since i didn't have the power to go thru the day without hearing from when we broke up so i was always around but i kept feeling used cos she only calls me when she has some problem and i was always willing to help but once she feels better i'm history again. for instance a week after the NC she called crying about the fight she had with her mum and i calm her down and told her to drive around or go shopping and she said she was broke hearing this i went to her apt when she was out to make her hair and i slipped some money in there for her. she thanked me and we started a routine of talking every morning again we went to the movies once and we planned going to the museum the following week but the guy she started seeing when we broke was now ready for her after his four weeks break so she called the outing off giving me some strange reason about somthing i did wrong like that wasn't bad enough we had to break into her Apt once cos she left her keys in and i told her i would get it fixed and since shez been dictating ever since we broke she wanted me to come fix it on monday and i said ok only for her to call me and asked if i could come fix it on sat cos she has an appointment on monday i went thereto fix the door only to see how excited she was chatting with the guy talking about how they kissed a day b4 and she knew i was there in the room so i fixed the door and told her i was leaving and she said ok. i left feeling stupid she claims they are just friends but i really dont care right now and i have made up my mind not to respond to her calls anymore not trying to be mean but just trying to heal myself cos i have forgotten all about myself

i would like to thank all you guyz that wrote something about my topic. i kind of feel better now about the whole thing now. i just miss her from time to time we still talk she wants me to be her bestfriend which is very hard for me cos i promised to be there for her and i really dont want to go back on my words although it hurts she got with this new guy like a week after we broke thinking it will make me mad but i told her i respested her decisions i just hope the guys treats her well and she said he takes her out every 2 days which i didn't and he respected her but all i had to offer was support and good morals cos i didn't have a job at that time but i still paid for everything when we went out. The sad part now is that the guy said he needed a break like four weeks and she is heart broken i couldn't stand see her go thruogh the depression so i've being trying to help her through it not expecting to get back. But i hurt inside most times. i will get better with time it's just taking for ever

I hope after saying this i will feel better from the respones i get. I meet my Ex about 6months ago and it just looked to me like she was my final stop in terms of who to spend the rest of my life with. she told me everything about her past which made me even apprecaites more. for me i have been more of the church guy that doesn't believe in pre marital sex and we discussed this before we started going out. i told her my limits even though i hadn't tried them before but i was willing to flex out a little bit since lack of romance could ruin a relationship, but everytime we played around i felt bad but i didn't want to make her feel bad by showing the way i felt about it. i tried telling her once that we should control things but it just didn't work so things kept on happening and i was getting closer to losing it. we had a problem that we were trying to get over which was clearly my fault and i tried everything possible to resolve things but it was just hard bcos she tells her mum everything and her mum will always try to protect her which is not a wrong thing but it puts me on edge. i told her we should always try to resolve thing ourselves before involveing other but her mum was always the first to hear about everything. what finally broke the camels back was when we went out for dinner and i had a little to drink which made me a little bolder that usual and we got home and started our usual thing but i could not control myself and things happened she told me to remember my vows but i was too confused to hear and she pushed me off and i became sober and cried like a little boy not bcos i lost my virginity but bcos i was that careless with someone i love so much she cried and called me names and said i was just like everyone else despite that fact that i never pressured her for sex for one second right now i feel all the guilt in the world and dont know if i can forgive my self bcos i betrayed her trust, not intentionally but i should not have being that careless. she still claims she loves me but we just can't be together again i still love her very much and wish we get back together but i dont know what to think. what am i pls someone should help me