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About Drea1024

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  • Birthday February 6
  1. Hey guys. So big revelation recently. If anyone has read any of this. Turns out he really was cheating on me during the pregnancy, was on tinder, had sex with his ex-fiance and began a relationship with a mutual co-worker the last month of my pregnancy. I was told about the relationship. After finding out, I tried to make it work, we went to couples counseling to no avail. Found out he was still cheating almost about a month ago, had actual evidence and he denied it and placed blame on me for "how bad he was treated throughout the pregnancy". Oh and he's also addicted to porn. He cheated on me
  2. The texting other girls happened during the first few months of our relationship, that old post was from 2016/17 I believe. We’ve been together 2 and a half years.
  3. Yes I’ve known that. I’ve attempted 3 times to talk to him but looking back now maybe 2 out of the 3 times it wasn’t so rational. I’ve attacked him verbally and that’s not the most constructive way to do it and I can see why he’d retreat more. He stated that he wanted the pregnancy, the mood swings and the negativity to be over because it’s only going to get harder. I hope postpartum I’ll make it through without any of all of that. And yes priority right now is the baby, we will have to figure us out later. Thank you and to others that have responded with tough love.
  4. Pregnancy was unplanned and I was hoping for interest, questions about the baby, affection, any type of excitement for our baby girl. I don’t want things to be over, we just both need to grow up. I will do therapy. My “sperm donor” comment was a low blow out of spite because of the complete disinterest in our child. Yes I’m an a** for saying it and it’s not true, he’s definitely the father. I just hope he steps up to the plate to actually become her father when she’s here any day now. Thanks for your response.
  5. You’re right. Reading back through all this it’s apparent that it is hard for me to let go of my own ego and selfishness/victim mentality. I think I’m right and he thinks he’s right. It’s blatantly toxic. There’s no compromise or in between. I’m definitely going to seek individual counseling, it’s been long time overdue for me. Thanks for your response.
  6. Billie2B, Thanks for your response. As far as his behavior in the past from a previous post, his distant behavior is not a personality trait. He was in fact texting other girls but I didn’t find out about until 8 or so months later. He became distant, felt in my gut he was talking to someone, did the whole checking the phone thing and he was. After that, he blew up, meaning he bottled up every thing he didn’t like about me or resented. That’s his personality trait. He keeps his feelings about me, negative ones to himself and withdraws any type of communication, interaction, or affection as
  7. His initial reaction was indifferent but so was mine. This entire pregnancy didn’t get started off on the right foot. When it was confirmed I cried because we didn’t plan it but he did console me and said we would figure everything out.
  8. If he does turn out to be that way, and my relationship with him is still poor then I would definitely separate from him and we will just have to co-parent. The longer I've been with him now it's becoming apparent that we aren't compatible in pretty much anything. We really are so different. For the sake of my daughter, I really hope he is a great father.
  9. Yes. Things had changed for the better for awhile. But here I am now, which is why here in this thread I had said to him that I thought this was all a mistake. I do love him but I truly believe he just doesn't love me or never has. I took a huge risk and now it's backfiring on me. I just wonder how he will be when the baby is here.
  10. You're absolutely right. The emotional health of my child will be detrimental and I definitely don't want that. I do admit that I've needed therapy for awhile but I have just been procrastinating to go. I really do want my child to have two loving parents who love her and love each other. I'll keep aiming for couples counseling. Our lease ends in October so there's about 4 months of trying to get it together. But you're right, a separation will have to be the next step because I don't want her to live with this toxicity and tension between us.
  11. Yes you two are right, even I can't even pinpoint exactly who's acted poorly first.It really all has been one big emotional blur. If we discuss again, I'll try to make it clear again that I really am sorry without bringing up the pregnancy. I'll take into consideration about what you've said if we split. Thank you for your insight.
  12. No absolutely not it's not a constructive and mature way to handle it. I admit that and I apologized for what I've said, regardless if the other poster thinks that I'm not holding myself accountable, I genuinely am regretful for what I've said and done. My rationality for doing and saying these things was because I wanted some kind of reaction, ANY KIND, but I got nothing every time. Doesn't make it right I know, but I was desperate and alone and hurt. I've sat down with him to discuss this amicably and each time nothing gets resolved because he can't let go of his ego/pride and the victim me
  13. Yes, and he did say that we are both guilty in to where it's become now. He doesn't believe in counseling, he thinks it's a bunch of quack. I'm 31 and he will be turning 35 in August. This pregnancy was not planned. I was on the Nuvaring forever but realized the hormones were making me very irritable and depressed so I got off of it. I was off birth control for 3 months, in which during that time we played with fire and had sex and only did pull out method. Didn't work obviously.
  14. I do hold myself accountable. But you really think the pregnancy has nothing to do with the way I've acted based on his actions of indifference? I didn't just start off being this way. I said hurtful things because I was hurting myself by him.
  15. I have suggested that already, he refuses and believes counseling won't do anything.
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