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About PainterGirl

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  1. Recently I was thinking of some of the things I experienced as a kid and wondering if they would be considered abusive. My dad would occasionally pull my hair, throw things (furniture) at me, rip clothing off my body, step on and break our toys, spank us with a paint mixing stick. I can remember the look of rage on his face at times when he would do these things.
  2. I definitely agree with you there. I will do what I have to do..
  3. Thanks everyone for responding. To answer what a lot of you are asking, why am I with him? Well, when I met him I was at a point in my life where I was very weak emotionally and physically. I was just about to undergo a serious surgery, completely on my own and he came into my life at that time and kind of... Was "there" for me through that ordeal, even though I still went through it alone, he was there to talk to through it all and we formed a bond because of that. At the time he had told me that he lived with his parents and yes it was definitely a red flag, but he also told me his pla
  4. I think you are all on to something.. He brought up his own parents unhappy marriage, to which I fired back that I was raised with two parents who loved each other deeply and were very happy in their marriage. The idea of him being secretly or even subconsciously misogynistic hadn't come to me, I will have to investigate that further. Thank you to you all for your responses.
  5. Would rather just stay single for the forseeable future if things don't work out between he and I. Thank you wise man for the response. Just an FYI to add for anyone els; he would like for us to rent a house together this spring .
  6. My boyfriend and I have been dating for going on two years now. I live on my own in an apartment, boyfriend still lives at home with his parents. He is 36 and I am 35. Boyfriend likes to bring up living together, last night I told him "sure, when we are married we can live together." I am not interested in living with a man I'm not married to; been there done that never doing it again.. Last night when I brought up marriage (not the first time I've told him my views on this and that I want to get married) , he reacted strongly. His words were something to the effect of "yea sure, get
  7. You guys are really opening my eyes to this... This has been a problem from the start and his continued stand that I'm just insecure and jealous...I thought he was right
  8. So that is considered gaslighting? I had wondered if he was gaslighting me
  9. You're right about my not wanting to rock the boat and that predating him... And I guess his questionable boundaries too.. I'm honestly afraid that he will just get offended or something if I bring it up, he will call me insecure and tell me it's in my head.. I'm afraid of what he will say if I tell him I'm not comfortable with him having ex lovers on his Facebook.
  10. Yea you're totally on point with this, I'm trying to be "cool"about it, there are reasons for that. One is honestly... I'm afraid of what people close to him will think of me if I'm the reason she's gone from his life. I'm afraid his friends and family will think I'm a jealousy freak because they have all known this girl and my boyfriend to be such close friends for so long. The other is I'm afraid that he will have a dramatic reaction, I'm afraid of what he'll say or do... What if I tell him that I'm really uncomfortable with him having friends in Facebook he's been lovers with and he just
  11. So I should just calmly tell him that I feel really uncomfortable with having former lovers on Facebook and see how he reacts?
  12. Should I just tell him full out that the fact they're still connected over Facebook is bothering me and see what his reaction to that is? Should I actually say that I would want him to remove her?
  13. I want to discuss it but I'm not sure what to say, how to approach it without causing any drama between us.
  14. Yes, the trust is the big issue. I need to find within myself if I can move past all this and just trust him. Yes it does feel shady, some it the behaviour. It's hard to ignore some of it.
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