kokorolove

16 days of NC, I think I am getting better. Doesn't have that urge to contact her so badly, but sometimes still wonder about what she is doing. But I told myself it's none of my business and if she wants me to know she would reach out. I don't know if I want her to reach out or not. Every night I either have a nightmare or I dream about her. Didn't have a good sleep for almost a year. She doesn't feel sorry for what she has done so why should I be sorry for making mistakes. We both hurt each other but she doesn't feel bad about it. I am getting stronger.

Day 3 of NC: Didn't look at my whatsapp at all because I know she isn't going to text me. I still hope she will contact me and say she wants to work things out again. I want her to miss me and realize that she needs me. But right now I want to heal. I really do. I feel empty, I don't know if I feel sad at all. Maybe I am, I know if I look at my whatsapp and didn't see her text me, that would make me feel sad. I am escaping it but I need to do whatever for me to heal to be honest.

Day 1 : I finally make up my mind. I am hurt by looking at her instagram and facebook, it cause too much pain for me to know how she is going. So I tell myself, why should I care if she doesn't? Its right, I should focus more on myself because I know when that day come, she knows she fxxked up Have a nice day with that boy, don't come back to me when he hurts you like shxts.

Day 1 I miss her, a lot, but I know I had to stop chasing around her anymore. I know that If I go NC, she will never text me or call me anymore, she said she needs me, but she never wants to commit to that. I have to move on...