Final cut

Is This late to post a reply? Well, antisocial........ That is one big problem. I was too, when I was at your age. Have you heard that one before? I, know what you mean, go at and find some friends, find a social hobby, talk to your parents or friends, yak yak yak. I hated crowds and talking to people, even the ones I knew and liked. If you're lucky someone will conact you one day and keep contacting you. One person is enough to keep another one alive. By age you will learn, but not alone. Often it sucks to be young. You're only 17. Like everybody says, things will get better. Lonelyness was about to break me down. Cutting my self, drinking, loking for tall building to jump off from, depressions. Don't go through life alone. It is possible but tough. It WILL get better.

It sounds like she don't want to be more than very good friends. maybe flirting a bit. Girls can be confusing. Some likes to have a very close relationship, but no more than that. If you can't deal with a friendship like that, maybe you should talk to her again. It might end your friendship, but it will take a loooong time to get rid of your problem if you don't deal with it.

Good! You really hit the nail right on spot. I add a text here because I cant' create a new topic. You can care about it or not. I wrote it a day when I felt the depression coming. Translated from my native language. The depression is coming! I feel it coming have felt it for days now tears appears in my eyes sudden floods of thoughts, which hearts happy moments makes me sad two lovers kissing makes me think of what I will never have what feelings I will never feel the music sounds different my hands and fingers can't control the strings on guitar anymore I spill water because of the floods of thoughts a strange unexplainable painfull sadness the pain is constant now when I lie, sit or stand cut my self to feel pain explainable pain making scares to make me remember the pain no one to talk to no one to hug no one to kiss no one to love no friends no lover no lust for life no courage to end it my selfmade suffering creating a bubble a safe on so no one will heart me so I can't feel the people looking at me talking about me sweating, beacuse of the fear fear of people coming to close why does it hurt why don't I do anything about it why are humans self destructive why can't we drag our self out nobody else will do it nobody else than you can see your pain and suffering seconds running so fast I can't follow my thought running faster I'm lost what hurts my self? is it the people close to me it can't be no one cares about some one who don't laugh give the world a smile and it will smile right back at you right! but is a smile enough to set me free free from the misty fog fog has alway been and will alway be there will always come rain after sun End

It's a pretty dumb question because it can't be answered, bu still. Life sucks! I have thought about commitng suicide since I was 12. I started geting depressions when I was 16 and havn't had real friends since and girlfriends is only sometihng others have. My father is insane, he tried to commit suicide when I was still a baby and gets pills to stay away from bad thoughts. My fathers father hang him self soon before I got born and more in my family has bad mental problems. It has not been found out why we feel like we do and that sucks. Pain that you can't explain. I cut my self, hits the wall, listen to sad music, drown my pain and thoughts in alcohol. Bla bla bla. I whine and have a lot of selfpitty. Life really sucks, so why is it so hard to end it? Because I am standing in greyzone. Life also gives me good things like the beauty of sunsets, Jazz and blues. I don't believe that a shrink can help me. What I need is some good friends, a girlfriend and some drugs to keep the dark clouds away, because they always ruin everything. I think of death as peace. When you are dead you don't excist any more. By the way, if you have never excisted, can you then be dead? I don't expect life to be easy, but I don't understand why life has to be that painfull, that lonely, just that way. Why?