Hello,
my fiancé and I have been together nearly 4 years now. The first 2 I largely financed us. He was having some financial trouble and I had to carry the load for a while.
i worked two jobs to be able to do this and it was quite a stressful period dealing with both the financial burden and his own volatile emotional outburst due to the stress of him running a startup.
he comes from quite a wealthy family and he has recently been given some money. We had an argument the other day as I suddenly realised that whether he has money or not he is not willing to help me or to share burden. He is happy for me to do it but hates it when it comes out of his pocket.
He argues that if I want to have enjoy certain luxuries then maybe I should look into getting a higher paid job. When I say certain luxuries I mean being able to have the heating on longer.
he wants to go on holidays but wants me to still pay half the share even if he has chosen expensive hotels etc and he doesn’t like the thought of staying in more affordable places which won’t stress my finances.
when speaking to him about this again his argument is I should maybe try and find a higher paying job or not have hobbies that I can’t afford.
i don’t expect him to buy me diamonds and nice holidays but as he is now making more money and has more disposable cash, i though he would take on the burden more similar to how I did when he was broke.
i feel very awkward discussing money with friends and family and i am genuinely concerned that I am in the wrong here so any advice would be much appreciated!