Lysflower

I have been reading this thread from beginning to end on an on/off basis over the past 4 months or so, and some stories have been really inspiring. I don't have that many stories to tell, as I don't seem to be surrounded by people who have successfully got back with their ex (i.e. for good). But here it goes: Story 1 I heard from a uni friend in summer 2015, I don't have much detail: G (the guy) and A (the girl) were dating when we were at uni in Southern France, and they seemed to be in a very stable LTR. I wasn't really good friends with them but we were hanging out from time to time at and outside of uni. We lost touch after uni, i.e. around 7 years ago. My friend told me in august 2015 that A had got bored of G and decided to break up with him and date older men. That's probably a typical case of GIGS. G was devastated because he genuinely thought A was the one, and I can tell they were literally the seemingly "unbreakable" couple at uni everyone could think of. I know nothing about the exact circumstances but a few months after the BU, G met with the girl he was in LTR with before dating A (probably in high school) and they got back together, literally years after their break-up. I don't know however whether they are still together - could always ask my friend to update me on this! Story 2 I heard from a friend (who also happens to be an ex) to comfort me about my ex ex (!): This is a lesbian story. D and G, were dating in their mid to late twenties in London. They were very much in love but disagreed on their life plans, as one of them wanted to go to the U.S. to pursue a career whilst the other wanted to remain in the UK (something along those lines). They broke up as a result, and D went to the U.S as she had planned. They probably lost touch or were in LC, but I cannot say for sure. Both D and G got on with their lives, found other partners and even have kids. Twenty years later D comes over to London for some friend reunion and meets with G. They then decide to reconcile, at the expense of their then-current partner.. 20 bloody years later! Story 3 is my favourite - I witnessed it live on New Year's Eve this year, and a friend gave me the last details the morning after over breakfast. Dawn and Will were dating in New York 15 years ago in their early to mid-twenties, and were really in love with each other. Will really wanted to go and live in Brazil and start businesses over there. Dawn was planning to follow him but could not get a visa (don't know why though). Will had to choose between going to Brazil to pursue his dream and therefore leave Dawn behind, or stay with her in NY. He chose to break-up with Dawn and went to Brazil, where he lived for 12 years, got married and had a son. Dawn was a basket case for months but she eventually managed to move on and got married as well. They completely lost touch. 12 or 15 years later, i.e. around 1 year and a half to two years ago, Will is going through divorce and wants to go back to the US or the UK (he has dual citizenship). At that point he decides to contact Dawn and finds her on Facebook. Dawn was also getting divorced at that time, and she felt unsure about meeting up with Will after all this time. All her friends and relatives advised her against seeing Will again, because of the mess she was in when he left her to go to Brazil. Dawn however decides to meet up with Will anyway. The rest is history. They got back together pretty much on the spot. 3 months later she was pregnant with their daughter, they got married last year, are raising their daughter and Will's son, and bought a beautiful cottage house in the English countryside. That's where I partied on New Year's Eve! (I am glad I crashed their party with a couple of friends All 3 stories are about people who successfully got back together years down the line, with very little or no contact at all while apart. This is a trend I have noticed in the various posts: the longer the time apart, the more likely a reconciliation becomes if the initial relationship was meaningful (and respectful) enough for both counterparts to have kept some space in their heart for their ex whilst moving on with their life. They "just" needed a last little push of luck and good timing. I wrote "just", but I guess we would all agree this is rare! The stars need to be aligned. Another element that struck me in story 3, and that was not touched upon in this thread, is the influence friends and relatives can have on reconciliations. It is actually my friend who told me that Dawn's entourage was hostile to the idea of her meeting up with Will. So I asked my friend what she would advise me to do if my ex ex (who is the only ex I would like to reconcile with) were to get in touch with me in a few years. Her response was exactly what I expected: "no-go area, don't do it, this would damage you even more". And yet, wasn't Dawn right in the end to disregard her friends' advice? That makes one wonder whether the possibility of reconciliation is not hindered sometimes by one's entourage - as all they can picture in their head is the hurt and drama caused by the BU. They switch to "overprotective" mode and forget that sometimes you have to take risks for good things to happen in your life. I know for sure that I would feel under pressure from my best friends and sister not to reconcile with my ex if the possibility were to materialize, even though they all agree she is a nice woman. Just a thought that maybe deserves a separate thread..