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Lost1

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  1. if you guys don't feel like reading alot, the main idea is perseverance and not pushing for anything here's my story.. me and my ex went out for about 9 months, and it we're both 21. we met in different colleges so we started as a long distance relationship, about 2 hours apart. we fell hard for eachother and fell in loved eachtoher very much. as summer came around we spent almost every second with eachother. everything was great until one day i invaded her privacy and she caught me reading her personal things, going into her accounts and such. she didnt fully break up with me and we worked things out. about two weeks after that, i made the same mistake again when she saw that i was looking through her stuff once again. so we broke up.. and i knew it.. i didnt put up a fight or anything, she called, told me we were over, and i told her i deserved it and that i made the same mistake twice. i asked if we could possibly leave the door open for the future but of course she said no and basically hated me all her friends hated me and she was 2 hours away so i couldn't really state my case. the first week after we broke up i called and did all the things you're not supposed to.. pleading, saying sorry, awknowleging my mistakes, telling her i've changed, everything under the sun.. but she wouldnt have it. most of the time when i called her she'd be cold to me and give me a very distan conversation. they were always one-way and i always ended up as the one being hurt and confused and pleading for her back. that weekend i asked if i could come visit and she said definitely not because we both knew what would happen. i went anyway and caught her off guard. i somehow convinced her to have lunch with me but she didnt allow me to talk about us the entire time. she forced me to leave about 3 hours after i arrived and let me just say that the ride home was really difficult i didnt believe that nc was the way to go . i knew i should and i knew that it would help me but i didnt want to. so i kept talking and calling her. after a while i realized that the pleading and begging was getting me nowhere. whenever i asked i always heard about how she was going out with other guys and making out with them and having flings with many different guys at once. but i didnt let her know that it bothered me. i kept positive and instead of being needy i started being confident and letting her date other guys, telling her i knew that i would be the only one for her. she started to become more and more involved in her school work and we started talking alot less. i gave up hope many times and just wanted to be there as a friend. she went through some tough troubles and i was there for her at her every call. whenever she needed me i was there to comfort her and let her know that i would always be there after she was done with all these other guys a week passed and she called me to ask me to come by because she was feeling down. i went over and basically put my foot down. i told her that it was either we get back together today or i would have to leave and end it for good because i couldnt keep going through everything without being her boyfriend. i gave her a couple days to make her decision (where i still talked to her and had good conversations with her) and went back to her place after that. she told me that none of the other guys were right for her and that she didn't have what she had with me with any other guy. she told me she wanted to get back with me but we'd have to work hard at re-establishing everything we lost. i asked if she wanted to be my girlfriend once again and she agreed. 2 months after we broke up and we're now both very happy and everything feels like how we left off (minus the invasion of privacy part) i think that nc is still the best way to heal.. if you want to heal but perseverance and just not giving up on what you and your significant other had, along with being there for her in her times of need and not pushing for a relationship back is key
  2. oops.. after a couple messages from her earlier in the day i finally msg'd her back talked lightly, but then things took a turn and i asked her about her relationship status she told me that she was dating right now and has no time for a real relationship, and that i'd be uncomfortable with her holding hands and kissing other guys so it wouldnt be the best idea for me i asked her if she's thought about us getting back together and she replied that she didnt really have time to think about it yet but she's not up for the long distance between us i told her that she already knows what i'll give her and she replied "what if that wasnt enough before?" ouch.. back to square 1 nc i guess.. if she messages me i'll just try being angry at her with the "how can you say i didnt do enough for you.. i did EVERYTHING for you" and hope it doesn't drive her away into the arms of another guy she seemed really distant while talking about it.. like i wasn't important anymore.. that scares me and tells me she's already forgetting about me
  3. so today was the second day of nc.. she contacted me to say hi but i told her i had to go and left abruptly.. i don't think she meant anything about it though, probably just bored in the afternoon between classes.. but one can dream! she's still dating the other guy and i'm letting my mind wander about what will develop between the two do i still have a chance? does she still think about me? does she still remember us?
  4. thanks guys.. i'm on this forum for now at least 4-5 hours a day just to help me stay strong and everyone's been really helpful another thing, she's really proud and most of the time arrogant as well. i'm wondering if this will factor into her decision? due to the fact that she may not email me or contact me even IF she misses me, because she will think it's a shot at her ego.\ if so, how do i break down this barrier and let her know i'm open to any communication if she so wishes? (withiout contacting her lol)
  5. thanks guys.. we went out for 8 months.. enough to create a solid foundation? and the problem is that she has a huge support group to keep her occupied and to keep her mind off me. Not to mention this new guy always around her and her always going out to clubs constantly meeting new guys and all her friends badmouthing me and telling her to forget me for the things i've done. i may sound ridiculous, but i'm just afraid.
  6. my gf recently broke up with me over something a few mistakes that i made that really hurt her. i'm trying nc now (a week after) and she messages me and we talk lightly. She tells me she's seeing a new guy but i can tell she still misses me a bit even though she doesnt admit it my question is this: do i continue nc ? i'm worried that if i continue nc she'll completely forget about our happy times together and replace them with the good times with this new guy.. there is still hope between us two and i'm just worried that if i continue nc she'll eventually move on completely and forget about me and the door will be closed for good i dont think the "absense makes the heart grow fonder" quote applies with my ex. i'm just worried that if i stay out of her life for too long she'll forget about me.. and i don't want that what do i do? stay in her life and attempt to keep her mind focused on me to prevent her from moving on? or give up all contact with her and basically let her be alone with this new guy.. which will probably become her boyfriend sooner or later if i let them be this is a big big big crossroads in my life.. we only went out for 8 months but there were plenty of memories and good times
  7. i am using my friend's account because i don't have one at the moment me and my boyfriend have been going out for a while now (about 6 months) we're both 20 and in college but we have the summer to spend together over the summer, we've had plenty of arguments, but came through them ok, and i've never questioned my feelings for him recently however, we broke up after a fight about a guy i was talking to who had feelings for me. i did not want to stop talking to him because he was a really good friend, and he got mad at me for it and broke up with me after the breakup, i was completely fine. usually i cry (my last boyfriend of just 4 months i cried over 3 days about). this non-reaction worried me a little that i did not actually feel for him the way i thought i did this summer has been up and down including alot of fights, but before that it was amazing we got back together (on sort of a break stage) when he came over and tried to apologize.. since then we've been okay but i still don't know how i feel about him, when we broke up i was fine! can anyone offer some insight/thoughts on why this is?
  8. ff feawfeawfeafwaf
  9. me and my girlfriend have been going out for about 4 months now. we had a serious talk today about how i always shrug off the problems she tells me she has every day, and how i joke about them and make her feel like she can't talk to me. my question is: how do i take her more seriously and figure out when she's joking and when she's being serious? please my relationship depends on it. also, how do i make her feel more comfortable talking to me about anything? she feels like she can't open up to me about anything and i'm looking to change that thanks -mike
  10. we started having 3 weeks ago it's always been with a condom since then, she noticed her boobs grew "a little" it's time for her period now.. and she had "really little drops" of her period yesterday.. then they stopped for today she's been eating alot more and grown a little bigger stomach is she pregnant?
  11. i'm not sure where to post for this topic but this is the closest. well the thing is, i need to do some serious work to get my marks up so i can get into college. but the problem is that whenever i try to work hard, i just get distracted and end up doing NO work whatsoever. i have one last chance to get my marks up, and i'm in desperate need of suggestions on how to stay on track and work harder. i tell myself day after day and year after year that "this will be the day/year where i start trying harder" and it never happens. i'll start doing my homework, then start surfing the internet and next thing i know, its 1:00 am and i have to go to sleep. i really need to start gettin my act together, but i just can't seem to do so.. can someone please give me suggestsions on what to do
  12. help! me and my friend had dry sex with only our underwear last night. I didnt penetrate, but i did stick my penis to her hole through our underwear. There was precum, but i'm not sure if it got through the underwear. We were going at it for more than half an hour, and i think i produce a lot of precum. she had a pad under her underwear, so i don't know if that helps at all with preventing precum from entering her hole. help! we're both 19 and cannot afford to have a baby!
  13. ouch.. that hurts i wasn't "snooping" or anything, i just came accross her personal site through some random event any way i could fix this relationship? and when i approach her, i think she's just going to lie about it. how do i know if she's being truthful?
  14. anyway, i met my girlfriend LITERALLY a month ago. we hit it off real good, and the week after we met each other we decided to go out. we started talking about ex's, and i found out her ex broke up with her a month ago because he couldnt handle a long distance relationship anyway, we started moving REALLY (and i mean REALLY) fast. now, 3 weeks later, i found her personal site on her history and when i checked it out its all these quotes about "if you'd let me have a second chance.." and things of that nature. what should i do? i really like this girl, but i dont want to be in a one-way relationship that's doomed from the start im 18 and she's 17 thanks, -mike
  15. well we are both 18, and although old enough to get over these childish games. not old enough to be mature about things and approach things head on and i don't think its a misdial if it happens literally once or twice a week.. for the past 3 months can someone please explain this to me? i can't approach her about it because it would make my gf and her feel uncomfortable.
  16. so anyway, my ex broke up with me a while ago back in early june. We went out for almost 10 months before she ended it because she 'wasnt in love with me anymore' and went back to her ex. over the past 3 months i've been receiving calls from my ex about once a week.. the thing is, when i pick up and answer the phone and say "hello" no one responds. I hang up and check caller display and the call is coming from her house. when we first broke up, i was shocked and sad and kept bothering for attention. I started no contact and realized that she wasn't all that great. i kept no contact and even now, i never initiate contact. She's got back together with her ex about a month after we broke up, and is still with him now. I have also found a new gf and she knows this. Can anyone explain this to me? i wouldn't get back together with my ex if she asked, but i'm just sort of curious as to why she would randomly call me for no reason. thanks, mike
  17. well there's this girl I like who doesn't go to my school we talk on the phone sometimes, and she says how she's always been with older, bad-boy type guys. the thing is, we're both the same age (18) and she's the type that has a lot of guy friends and goes out partying all the time and i'm not really that party-hard type. i'm more of a nice-guy who knows how to have fun and just goes to more conservative parties we've been out alone once for dinner.. but just as friends i make her laugh a lot, and we always have fun together here's my problem: how can i get her to start paying attention to me and give her some signals that i like her without coming out and saying it do i, as a sort of nice guy, stand a chance with this type of girl?
  18. thanks, but i'm really really shy and i don't think i can do the hand-holding thing all that well and how do u know she's even the slightest bit interested in me? the thing is, she's one of the popular types, with a million other guy friends. i'm not sure if she acts the same way around them as she does to me, so i'm not all that certain that she's feeling the same way towards me by the way, where should we go for dinner? formal? casual? thanks
  19. well anyway i'm going out to dinner with this girl i like tomorrow she doesn't know that i have feelings for her and i didn't officially "ask her out" we just sort of came up with the idea to go out for dinner this will be the fourth time we've been out together and the first time we'd be alone i don't know if she has feelings for me at all, because she treats me like she does but never calls or initiates contact with me, and i don't know how she treats her other friends so she might just be being friendly so i need help with: - how do i let her know that i like her (without directly telling her) - what do i say? - what should i do? - any tips? - what are some signs that she's interested that i can look for during our dinner by the way, i'm 18 thanks. - mike
  20. well summer's over, and i have met many different girls. Only one stands out in my mind though, and I'm feeling so attracted to her. The thing is, we met through a swimming class, where i only got to see her once a week for about 3 weeks. Before the class ended I asked for her e-mail and she gave it. She lives really far away, and we don't go to the same school, thereforeeee i really don't see her outside of that class. We've talked on the phone once... a conversation that lasted for about 2 hours. I make her laugh a lot and all our conversations are funny and upbeat. Well last week we went out just before summer ended. We got really close and flirty and touched a lot... but i don't kno if this is what she does with all her guy friends or just me, because she's a real party girl.. with lots of friends, especially guy friends. She hasn't called or e-mailed me since then, and i'm wondering if she's even thinking about me, and all the fun we had that day... - we're both 18 - i like her, she doesnt know (i don't think) i have 2 questions: a) how do i avoid the evil "friend zone" b) how do i get her to notice me more? c) how do i get her to go out with me thanks...
  21. so anyway, i'm going to some place with this girl i like tomorrow.. the problem is that there are 3 other people coming with us. one of them is her friend and the other two are mine that i brought along to make it less nerve-wrecking my problem is that, 1) i don't know if she even likes me. We've talked on the phone for hours but that was just casual. Just getting to know each other kinda thing 2) how do i get her alone to talk to her and get a little closer to her? 3) we don't have the same friends so it's weird because her friends and mine may not get along, meaning that she will be stuck with her friend all day, while im stuck with mine 4) i've known her for about 2 months now. talked to her on and off, but mostly all our conversations are upbeat and funny any other tips u can give me on this topic please help.. thanks
  22. What if your penis is curved upwards? Like when i get an erection the head points straight up at me Is it bad? Can you correct it?
  23. does anyone know how long it takes before accutane kicks in and u really notice a difference on your face?
  24. but.. i've contacted her before and she was cold, and kept repeating "its over.. its over.. sorry" and the second week during no contact.. she tells her friend she misses me i don't want it to be like the first time i contacted her, and i dont want to feel like a fool and go back to her while she says no. Also i don't want to go all the way back to square 1 of NC.. is there any sublte/faint and innocent ways that i can let her know im still interested in us being together? thanks
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