s4m

Thanks for the support. Questions. We are both on the mortgage. About 80:20 with me with the bigger $ amount. The disability started to show itself not long after we got the place. If this had happened before, I would have got a house on sole ownership. It isn't a easy one. It flares up. But can't be predicted. Is it getting worse? Or could it get better? No one could say. I think it's getting worse. As it stands no marriage. Relationship is absent on both sides. Housemates would be how the situation is currently. I will talk to her. If its coming its better to sort now. Its very sad. Relationship is unrecognisable to a year ago.

Life just got grim. My girlfriend of 4 years recently lost her job. She's developed a condition that is disabling. But to cut a long story short she has lost her job due to excessive and increasing absence. Chronic pain is the main symptom. The company did do a lot to help. It was a demanding Corp job. But not physical. But her lack of productivity and deterioration has resulted in this outcome. Dismissal is fair unfortunately. I do not see any obvious job she could do. This same condition also means she cannot really do anything at home. Feeding the cat is the limit really. Which leaves me with all the house work, and now a mortgage issue and the associated stress. It's not an issue today. But I suspect in a years time it will be when savings are gone. Not much left in the relationship either. With the condition comes mood swings and understandable frustration. I have my mental health issues too and really, struggling with my job motivation and house work and stress of the relationship. I'm being worn down. It pains me to say it, but I prefer to be away from home. I've lost my drive and depression is creeping back in from my past. The sensible thing to do would be for her to live with parents if she can't work. Get a lodger in here, and at least not default on the mortgage. But as angry and as toxic as the environment is. I'm not sure she will want to do that. I'm scared to suggest it. I know it's not a good sign to be scared of talking. But that is the point we are at. Not even sure I'm looking for advice. Maybe I am.