Lunaetick

So far I really like it! I am about half way through the second book in the trilogy. They are quick and easy reads, and there's a good deal of suspense which makes it a little hard to put down.

Anna, I just finished Water for Elephants, and loved it! A Discovery of Witches is also on my to-read list, I'm glad to hear that you liked it. I'm currently reading the Hunger Games and it's interesting so far.

Hey all, I'm a college student, and I was hoping to gain some insight here. Several months ago I finally ended a long and rather painful relationship. We had sex frequently, but my ex neglected my emotional needs and just seemed completely obsessed with sex. I don't really know why I stayed with him for so long, but I did. Anyway, a lot of the time he seemed to control all of the sexual aspects of our relationship; he would pressure me into doing things that I wasn't comfortable doing, and if I didn't comply he'd get upset and make it into a long and drawn-out issue. It got to the point where I'd have sex with him just to make him happy, so he didn't cause problems and so he wouldn't leave me. I never really told him no, I was usually just quiet about it and let it happen, but I was never really enthusiastic either. One time, at a point where everything was going fine in the relationship and before this became an issue, he almost broke up with me because I wasn't having orgasms with him (and I had never had one before in my life prior to then). Another time he wrote a really graphic sex story about the two of us and I told him that I didn't like it, but instead of talking about it with me or expressing concern he posted it on a pornographic website and then bragged to me about how many people read it. It was such a long relationship and it's hard to come up with and list all of the specific examples of things, but usually I seemed really unenthusiastic about sex but complied anyway to avoid him leaving me, and he pushed me into doing things most of the time. So my question is, does this count as date rape? I wasn't sure because I let him do this and I never actually said no to him, but this was because I was emotionally insecure and didn't want him to leave. I know the relationship was disfunctional and that he was a jerk, and I don't want to press charges if it is, but for my own benefit I'd like to know because it's been bothering me and has made me unhappy. Thanks for reading this and for your comments.

I know exactly what you're going through, I'm in a very similar situation. My boyfriend of three years and I just split two weeks ago and it was both of our first relationships too. I know that the pain can be overwhelming, that just getting out of bed each morning can be a huge challenge, and it seems that everywhere you go, no matter what you do, you're reminded of that person. I think the best way to make it through this is to give it time and to try to stay busy. I know that you mentioned that you and her shared many of the same hobbies, so maybe you could find a new hobby and use that as a way to redefine your identity and rebuild your sense of self-worth. Take it one day at a time, even though each day seems so difficult and empty (at least for me). I try to allow myself to experience all of the emotions that wash over me, but I usually end up drowning in them and I don't exactly know how avoid that. I know what you mean when you said you need to let you go, but you don't know how, or if you really want to at all. I really wish I knew... I'm sorry, I know this hasn't been much help, but if you need someone to talk to who's going through much of the same thing, I'm here.

I have been involved with my now ex for four and a half years, and we have been dating for three. We broke up two weeks ago, on New Year's eve because we are going to different colleges and rarely got to see each other during the semester, a problem which has taken a toll on the relationship. There are other problems, of course, but that was the big one. Now, we have both acknowledged to each other that we still love each other immensely and don't want this to be completely over with, but that we can't share a relationship until the distance is no longer an issue (ie, when we both graduate, and I'm a freshman and he's a sophomore). So, last night as we were talking online, as we usually do as if nothing had changed between us, we made a decision to continue with each of us knowing that the other still cares. We flirt a lot and our conversations have almost improved now that we're no longer together. He wants me to come visit him (he's living on campus right now) before winter break ends, and I'm sure it will probably end in some kind of intimacy, most likely sex. It's as if we're together but we're not. We're allowed to see other people but also see each other as well. We seem to have an open relationship, although we've never actually officially said that we're back in a relationship, but we certainly seem to have one. I have believed ever since I met him that we're meant to be together (he was 15 and I was 14 when we first got involved, so this is part of the reason why this is so difficult). I miss him immensely and I want to see him and never lose what we had, but I'm afraid that it will just end in more pain. I probably need to get out and date around, but my heart is still fixiated on him, as it feels like it always will be. What should I do? Should I visit him? Should I just end all contact with him and try to move on or should I hold on to what we have and see if it lasts? Either way seems extremely painful, and this is all so overwhelming...