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kaboom1218 last won the day on May 4 2011

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  1. Merry Christmas everyone! 🎅🏾I’m usually pretty upbeat or try to be as optimistic as possible and show gratitude for all of my blessings, especially when so many are suffering, but I guess it just hit me today that for the first time in my life I won’t be spending Xmas with my senior parents. I choose to be safe over taking the chance of traveling to see them, but it’s still depressing on top of everything going on in the world. And we’re in different states, so I can’t even do a drive by—a video chat will have to do. I’m sure other people are feeling the same, so maybe this is the place t
  2. I've definitely been where you're at--unfulfilled in my career, unsure how to get to a place of happiness and fulfillment in my life. But I focused on finding a career in areas where my passions and strengths lie and I've found my way to a much happier, upward bound life. Maybe consider tutoring, which would allow you to use your education background, but in more of a one-on-one setting with a student vs. being bombarded by a classroom full. Being a nanny/manny is also a similar setup. I'm not sure where you live, but in the States, with the right company, you can make good money doing eit
  3. OP, I suggested you inform him about the situation more for your peace of mind than for his benefit so that you know for certain that he is fully aware of the situation. And as we see he is a cowardly, reckless punk. He definitely deserves a tongue lashing and smack upside the head for how he's reacted! I know it's a major blow to be ghosted and then on top of it by someone who gave you an STI! Try not to beat yourself up too much in lieu of some of the "tough love" you've received on this thread. We've all made sexual mistakes and may just have had luck on our sides and shouldn't be so q
  4. As has already been mentioned, in 2017 OP, you can't take chances having unprotected sex with ANYONE until tested. Even knowing them longer or being in a relationship those assumptions can't be made. But sounds like you learned your lesson and what you have is curable from the symptoms you mentioned. I'm not sure if you want to share with us whether it is or isn't something curable. If you either want closure, to vent, inform him of the situation or all of the above, I'd tell him via text or voice message. We don't know why he ghosted, but at least you'll have peace of mind that he knows wh
  5. No. What the OP is questioning is whether it's suspect that the guy has replaced any photos of his actual appearance with some generic photo. In my experience, I've either thought they were married/attached and trying to be DL on a dating site or have something else to hide. Similar to guys with private images or who show their photos one minute then hide them the next, which is an option on the site I use. I even just had a guy ask for my number and replied with his & now his profile and our messages have disappeared. I even asked him if he would use the number since so many guys ask
  6. Thank you! He said the opposite. That there was time for us to hangout together. Whaaaa?? After that, he pulled back a bit, which I could sense because he had been pretty proactive before that. I had to reach out to him and he was responsive, but then he finally admits his feelings about me not going. He took offense to my decision and he and the cousin thought it was strange. Like, dude. We just met! And the cousin ends up negatively influencing the situation, which I was trying to avoid, even with me not going! He seemed cool about me not going before, but really wasn't. Who t
  7. Hi ENAers, I had only been out on a date with a guy ONE time and it went well. We had good conversation, seems like there's some potential there. At the end of that date, he mentioned that I should hang out with him and his female cousin who would be in from out of town the next week. At the time, I agreed not really thinking much of it. But the more I thought about it, I decided that I'd rather get to know him a bit more before mingling with anyone in his circle. Trying not to go into detail about my reasoning, I told him that I'd just let him and his cousin hang out together and i
  8. The question is no longer relevant.
  9. No, you're not off-topic, although this thread has been several times as you may have noticed. Actually, I think your post is spot on to how I'm feeling and puts things back into perspective and is the main reason I created the thread. To offer a well-rounded view of what possible scenarios a dumpee might face if contacting their ex. You and I haven't contacted our exes, but still plan to at the right time despite some discouraging comments. Some folks giving that advice, haven't applied it in their own lives and even so, can't determine how your story will end. You know you and your ex's sit
  10. Tresqua & NC, I agree with both of your posts in regards to at least attempting to address and resolve the issues. I appreciate that mindset, instead of someone who gives up on the relationship without putting in much effort or giving up at the first sign of trouble. Unfortunately, some of us aren't approached about the issues or given adequate time to try to fix any of them before the other calls it quits. My ex and I had issues, some more difficult than others, that we could have tried to overcome. All relationships do, but I wonder if when some folks enter a relationship, they realize t
  11. ^^And once again, no one here is a mind reader and instead of ASSuming, which we know what that does, some of us are willing to ASK the other person instead of applying the same, obvious approach that isn't necessarily going to result in the truth or provide any answers. And if someone wants to reach out to their ex, LET THEM do it in peace! It's like it's some people's mission to disrupt attempts at happiness or allowing others to take a risk that may be succeed, at any cost. Even though countless examples of successful reconciliations are stated time and time again. Facts not Fiction, pl
  12. ^^Thanks NCforME for giving more examples of successful reconciliations, which will benefit those of us wanting to read encouraging comments. They also contradict all of the naysayers that insist on posting negative comments that are irrelevant to the topic of the thread and keep perpetuating never-ending arguments and tension.
  13. ^^I like that. It is true that the value and dedication to relationships has dwindled and suffered over the years and while some "old-school" marriages lasted longer than they should, they are a true testament to what commitment is all about. It takes equal amounts of effort on both sides for it to work and sometimes pride and ego must be set aside for the end goal to be achieved. A lot of people don't want to deal with the challenges anymore and want to give up at the first sign of trouble. In reference to other comments, unless some posters have a crystal ball, which if you do please p
  14. Very interesting and encouraging observations indeed that are different from what's normally stated around here. Some people almost get guilted by some into not reaching out or following what they're gut is telling them. It's only human. So would you like to share how your real-life "science experiment" worked out? Lol. From your posts, I gather you may have tried to reconcile in relationships or been receptive to it and I'm curious about what happened. If you don't want to say here, PM me if you like. I believe in pretty much everything you say, but as the dumpee, you may think that the d
  15. ^^Very well-stated and thanks for bringing the thread back on topic. I was also thinking recently that a job search is similar to love and relationships. Because you do get rejected, knocked around and your emotions put on a rollercoaster based upon the circumstances. But if you want it or to succeed badly enough, then you do have to put your pride aside sometimes and go for it. You may be disappointed and not like the results, but sometimes you may achieve positive results and the effort will be worth it all in the end. I've just recently been through some job situations that required som
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