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  • Birthday 10/20/1986

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  1. Thanks for all your help everyone. I really appreciate it. Him and I both came to a mutual agreement that even though it would be satisfying in the short-term, it would serve to provide way too many complications in the long-term. We agree it would be a mistake. Thanks again! All of your opinions were useful in helping me come to a decision.
  2. Thanks for all your input guys. I am really confused over this. On the one hand, I really just want sex (but it does have to include kissing - I'd have to ask him about that). But on the other hand I can't help but be a little scared that all my feelings for him will come back if I go through with it. To give a few more details on the story - we hadn't actually slept together during our relationship. We were together two months and we did almost everything sexual except intercourse. We had a strong sexual connection, and it's kind of like it was just left hanging when we broke up. We both know, and acknowledge, that if we had've stayed together sex would've followed shortly after. He sees it as a way to get it out of our systems. Both of us miss it and can't stop thinking about it. And neither of us has slept with anyone else since we broke up. I've also had such strong urges and fantasies about him and us lately. Even though he brought this up first today, I was actually thinking of asking him the same thing (his opinions on casual sex) - which was ironic. I just heard two girls have a conversation about sex the other day and it made me realize just how badly I wanted it. If you have anything else to add, it'd be appreciated. Thanks again!
  3. So, as the subject says, what do you guys think of sex with an ex? My boyfriend broke up with me six weeks ago, but ever since then, I've really missed the physical aspects of our relationship. And I just found out today that he has missed it to. He has, however, no intention of getting back together in a relationship. Would casual sex with him be wrong?
  4. Thanks for all your replies guys! Nice to know I'm not alone. Just a little story on this topic: I was in a lecture hall at university, sitting next to the guy I've just started dating (we haven't kissed yet)... we always sit together for 40 minutes between classes and chat. Well, since we decided to start dating about a week ago, he's been sitting much closer to me, and angling his body towards mine so that our knees/legs touch. And he puts his arm on my armrest now so that our elbows touch as well. So anyway, today when we were sitting there chatting, I was telling him something, when all of a sudden he moved to get comfortable, and our arms brushed closer together, and I felt his warm skin on mine. It sent pleasure #2 throughout my body, which caused me to stumble in my words and almost close my eyes... and my head also got a little foggy for a few seconds. This actually happened to me twice within the 40 minutes too. I loved being so close to him. Anybody else have it happen at random times like that? I guess another question that I'm curious about is if guys experience pleasure #2 as well? Thanks!
  5. I'm not sure if this is the appropriate forum, but it seemed okay... so here goes. My body seems to have two different responses, depending on the type of sexual stimulation. It confuses me, but I'll try to explain both as best I can so maybe somebody can help make sense of it. First, there's this specific, sharp pleasure I get "down there" when I get direct stimulation. It only feels good in the nether regions, it isn't a full-body pleasure or anything. I have never had an orgasm; but I have had small "blips" or waves of pleasure that some people may categorize as a mini-orgasm. Once again, it is only very specific to that area, and doesn't involve any other parts of the body. I also get this kind of pleasure when I see hard-core sex. Second, there's this full-body pleasure I get sometimes... it starts in the torso/stomach and can move further up and down if the stimulus keeps going. My head gets foggy and everything, and I just feel SO good. It's almost like a feeling of "desire." I really, really enjoy this type of pleasure. I get this feeling when sitting or laying close to a guy I like (close enough to be touching him unintentionally), when I'm kissing a guy, and when a guy unexpectedly puts his arms around me from behind. I also get this feeling if I watch passionate kissing on TV, or softcore, under-the-sheets, missionary (but passionate) sex..... or even just from imagining any of the above things. For example, if I fantasize about making out with the guy I like, it makes feel good in this way too. So I guess my question is, does everybody else experience these two different types of pleasure? Personally, I enjoy the second type, the full-body feeling of desire, much better than the specific clitoral pleasure. Is anybody else like this? Furthermore, I don't specifically like linking specific clitoral pleasure with the guy I'm into. I'd much rather experience pleasure #2 when thinking about, or with, him. Is that odd? Thanks so much for your input!
  6. I wasn't sure where to post this topic, so hopefully I wasn't dreadfully wrong in posting it here, lol. I live in Canada, and most websites I read on birth control and the pill are from the U.S. Most say that you are required to have a pelvic exam/pap smear in order to go the Pill or the Patch. I was wondering if the same was true of Canada? Does anyone know the process? Do I HAVE to have a pelvic exam to go on the pill? Thank you.
  7. Thanks for all your help. But now I have another problem I mentioned his birthday to him and asked if he was doing anything special, and he said "not really, i'm not a fan of big birthday bashes" and i said "ohhh i see. what about gifts? like.. if i got you something, you wouldn't mind?" and his response was "i actually would, do NOT buy me a gift, lol". He said that kinda rudely (though its hard to tell on msn) and i was wondering what he meant by it, but then he added "we've only known each other a short while". I was surprised. I took so long in answering him because i was flustered and didnt know what to say, that he said "what's wrong? you don't like what i said right?". I just told him that i was thinking of how to word what i wanted to say. Anyway, i told him since he's paid for everything on our first two dates that I thought it would be nice if i paid for our date on/around his birthday, and/or bought him a gift. He told me that he didn't want me thinking like that, that he was old fashioned, and did not want me feeling like I owed him anything. I reassured him I didn't think i owed him something, but I just thought it would be a nice gesture to pay for our date (in my head thinking of the movie tickets). He said "well we'll see, i'm really busy with school anyway, it's not a big deal for me, it's just another day". I told him i understood and just thought i'd ask his view on the whole birthday issue. He said "hey no prob, you can pay next time if it will make you feel better, lol" and we sort of said goodbye on bad-ish terms. Now I'm really confused.. do I go ahead with the movie tickets? When we get together, do I take out my wallet and offer to pay right away or wait til he says something about it? My biggest concern is that he really doesn't make much sense. He thinks its too soon for birthday gifts (which in my mind makes me think he feels its too soon for a serious relationship), yet it's not too soon to be making out with me and/or feeling me up in the back seat of his car... plus a first date was not too soon for a kiss. Don't get me wrong, I really enjoy it when he kisses me.. and don't want it to stop, but I also want the other levels. Does anyone else agree that that seems a little odd? Like a contradiction of how he feels, almost? Thanks so much.
  8. Thanks everyone, you all gave great ideas. I felt the need to mention how I've made out with him because I wanted everyone to know exactly how serious it was and stuff. If we'd been on two dates and never had even kissed, it would almost be like we were just friends, and that could affect the gift giving. How's this: At the place I work there is deal on movie tickets. You get two adult movie tickets, two regular drinks, and one regular popcorn for a really good deal. Does that sound like a good gift idea for him? (on the condition that he takes me! 8) ) And maybe I will burn a cd of songs he likes as well, so that way he has the music and is treated to a movie but it doesn't cost me the price of two gifts
  9. Ok, here's the situation: - I've known this guy for a little over a month - I'm almost 19 and he is almost 24 - we've went on two dates - we've french kissed - we've sort of like.. felt each other up while making out in the back seat of his car - we always have lots to talk about - he's really sweet, opens car doors for me and such - we talk on msn just about every night Our third date will probably be next week sometime, which is when his birthday is (August 2nd). I want to celebrate his birthday with him, but the thing is, I have NO idea what to get him. What kind of gift do you get a 24-year-old guy? Especially one who you've been dating for a couple of weeks, and known a couple of months, and the day you're giving the gift is your third date? Thanks so much for your help.
  10. There's this guy I've been great friends with since the beginning of February. We only talked online for the first two months.. and he told me he just wanted to be friends. I was fine with that at the time. We tell each other everything, even problems involving the opposite sex. We get along great, we joke, laugh.. in person we tickle each other, play around.. etc. We're always there for each other when we need a friend. I met him in person for the first time after the two months and we've hung out four times in total within the last 7 weeks. We watched movies each time. First at my house sitting on my couch.. and the other three times at his house laying on his bed. The second and third times we started tickling each other and getting into pillow fights and just having a great time together. He gave me like.. four hugs when we were.. wrestling on the floor. He knocked me over three times almost landing on top of me. He's also the sweetest guy in the world. He opens doors for me, he pays for everything when we hang out (movies, pizza), if I drop something he even picks it up for me! Also, he gave me two stuffed animals (the second time we spent the whole day together). So after all of this happened I started developing feelings for him. I loved to be talking to him and I was asking him to hang out more often. I would get upset when hearing about the girls he likes(before I used to be happy for him and give him advice). I eventually told him how I felt about him but he said that because he really likes this girl he works with, it wouldn't be fair to date someone else when he'd be thinking about the other girl. He said he just wanted to be my close friend. He also said that if we ever did start a relationship, it could jeopardize our great friendship... and he likes things the way they are now... where we can talk about anything. I left it at that for a while, but then he told me how he hung out with this other girl (other than the one he really likes) and I was hurt by it.. especially cuz at the time he was saying no to hanging out with me. We again got into talking about why he doesn't want to be with me.. and he said there are just some people he would date and some people he wouldn't... its just a feeling he has. But I found that weird coming from him because he has crushes on about eight different girls he works with (tho he likes that one a lot more than the others). Yesterday we hung out again for about seven hours. Things were going pretty well, we picked out movies and took a walk around a university campus. We went to his house to watch the movies. Towards the end I tried to start tickling him and he'd push my hand away like normal (because he is very ticklish), but he was rougher and didnt seem to be into it. After tickling and poking him for a while, I finally gave up. But see yesterday wasn't all bad, it was the day he opened all the doors for me, paid for the movies, and picked up something I dropped. So its confusing. When he said it was time to go.. I was kinda upset that we hadn't played around/wrestled/tickled each other like usual. I was quiet on the way home and he figured something was wrong. When we talked online afterwards I told him why I was upset... and his only answer to "why didnt we joke around?" was "i just didnt wanna be tickled". So we've kinda left on bad terms now and I haven't talked to him since. Anyway, I'm sorry this is so long but I needed to get all the details in there. I'm really confused because he gives some signals that he likes me as more than friends, but he outright says that he only wants to be friends. From what I've said, what do you think? Do you think hes too shy? or scared? (a year and a half ago he got out of a messy year and a half relationship and was hurt by it, he still misses his ex a little, and she was the only girlfriend he's ever had... hes even said to me he doesnt know why anyone would wanna be with him). Another question I had, was if there was anything I could do to get him to like me? Any way I should act, things I should say (or shouldnt!)? Or should I just leave it alone and be his friend? ...secretly hurt every time he mentions another girl? (or sometimes not-so-secretly since he knows when im upset about something and I end up telling him). Thanks for your help and patience with this long post!
  11. Katie, you were right....I should've thought about continuing to date this person....I shouldn't of made the stupid mistake of taking him back. Because yesterday he hurt me again. He changed his mind all over again and broke up with me after four days of being bf and gf. So yeah, I'm not taking any more of his BS. He's dragged me up and down too long. But thanks for the help from all you. I appreciate it.
  12. I think you said the wrong name there when asking the ages Ocean Eyes, I am the one with the new boyfriend. I am 17 (turning 18 in six weeks) and my boyfriend turned 19 about a month ago. I guess I am pretty mature for my age....others have said so as well. I agree with you drahcir, I believe that people shouldn't have close friends of the opposite sex....at least not ones they spend lots of time with one-on-one. I mean, acquaintances are fine.... I have a group of friends that involve both males and females, some are attached and some aren't. One of my close friends is attached but is still friends with some of the guys in our circle. Just what I'm concerned about is that it's almost like he is dating these other girls because he goes to the movies with them, or has them come over to his house to watch tv or movies or play games, or goes out for lunch etc...and its always just the two of them. He says he isn't good with groups of people. If the girls he hangs out with were just in his circle of friends that always hang out together on weekends or whatever it would be perfectly fine with me. In regards to what you said, Katie, about putting his own wants first.....he's always told me from the beginning that he's lived his life to make others happy, always doing what they want whether he is happy or not. When he broke up with me, he also said that he'd only asked me out because he thought that was what would make me happy.....then when he apologized a week later, he said that he made up a bunch of lies (like the making me happy part) because he had a panic attack. He now tells me he has an anxiety disorder. I want to believe him.....but telling me he made up a bunch of lies has me thinking that maybe everything he tells me is a lie. Thanks for all of your replies. Anything else you have to say would be greatly appreciated.
  13. I met this guy about five or six weeks ago. From the beginning he told me he only wanted to be friends and was not looking for any sort of relationship. A couple of weeks later he said he wanted to go out with me but was nervous and confused and didn't want to ruin our friendship....then the next day he went back to saying he didn't want a relationship and only wanted to be friends. After a couple more weeks of him changing his mind like this, he kissed me several times and then asked me to be his gf. I said yes. A half hour later he came online and said we couldn't do this...said we couldn't start a relationship. He then even said we could no longer be friends. He was quite harsh about it. We didn't talk for a week....and then exactly one week later re-added me to msn (he blocked and deleted me after our argument where he broke up with me and ended our friendship). He apologized profusely for hurting me and just wanted to see if I was okay. At first he said he wasn't looking to get my forgiveness....but then said if I didn't hate him maybe we could try to be friends again. We hung out three days later and he apologized again is person and said he really did want to go out with me the whole time, but had just paniced cause he thought we were moving too fast ...and plus the fact that he'd told all his friends that he didn't want a relationship and stuff and that's why he broke it off. So anyway, he asked me out again and after much deliberation on my part (because I figured he'd do the same thing again and change his mind) I finally accepted. So now after all of that alone I don't know if I can totally trust him ya know. He's constantly arguing with himself and changing his mind about everything. I am still kinda worried he'll break it off again in a day or two when his mind changes again about how he feels. But this isn't the whole story.....he has many female friends....and he's actually hanging out with one of them as we speak. I am kinda jealous that he hangs out with so many girls just one-on-one all the time. I guess I'm scared he'll start liking one of them or find someone better than me. So that put together with the fact that he changes his mind all the time about what he wants....I don't feel I can completely trust him. Do you think I'm right in my decision here? Could he be doing the same thing he's doing with me with all those other girls? It's not just the jealousy, it's mostly the fact that I'm afraid I am going to lose him again. Anyone have any advice? Thanks.
  14. Ok, I am a female who is almost 18 years old. I have never had an orgasm....and I almost came close to having sex once. My hymen was broken but I didn't go through with having sex. My question relates to this in that I find it very difficult to insert a tampon (like it has to get past this bone or something and it kinda hurts when I try to do so....and then when its in, maybe I didn't put it far enough in, it is uncomfortable) and then to take it out, and I find it difficult to finger myself as I can only fit one finger inside at the most, sometimes I can fit two but it hurts a little and is uncomfortable. I've tried masturbation both with the clitoris and penetration but I don't feel much, if any, pleasure with my clitoris and I cannot go ahead with putting anything into my vagina that is bigger than my one finger, because it is uncomfortable or starts to hurt. I was wondering if this was normal? Will I ever be able to have sex normally without pain and discomfort? Would a penis be too big to get past that pelvic bone? At the moment I don't have anyone who I would want to have sex with, but I think if I did I would be really scared to try for fear it wouldn't fit and fear of the pain. Any advice is appreciated...Thanks.
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