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Showing content with the highest reputation on 10/30/2020 in all areas

  1. I'm just going to write what I'm thinking. I may be way wrong, but it feels like you are leaving out important info and these are my intuitive thoughts based on my experiences. Were the hospitalizations due to alcohol? Do you have a history of substance use, depression, or anything like that? How old was your daughter when her father passed away? Again, I could be way off, but my gut reaction is there is some bigger issue which you are in denial of and which your daughter has suffered a lot from.
    3 points
  2. This may sound like I'm crazy but you dodged a bullet here.
    2 points
  3. I'm sorry he did this to you. Its obvious you love him, as you're understanding and even defending his actions. The thing is, he is choosing his family over you. right or wrong. And further harming you, by stringing you along, as a result. You said, you're very compatible. But are you? Not in this case. And this is the biggest of cases- Agreeing to being in a relationship. This guy is weak in a fundamental way. Not much else matters. I've tried the friend zone and have seen others to know, this does not work out. Something in the dynamic changes the respect and desire elements neede
    2 points
  4. Cookie, do you really want to be with someone who can't make decisions for himself?
    1 point
  5. We have had the most amazing day!! It was Lass's birthday, and with the weather forecast fairly decent, we headed back to the Lake District, and revisited my most favourite place in the world! Ennerdale in the Western Lakes, where I had many a happy childhood holiday. Untitled by Dales Boy, on Flickr Untitled by Dales Boy, on Flickr Untitled by Dales Boy, on Flickr Untitled by Dales Boy, on Flickr Honestly can't remember the last time I've had such a great day!
    1 point
  6. Lean on your husband instead of your friend. Reach out and find girlfriends to communicate with as well. Let him have a tantrum. There could be other things at work - things he is stressed out about but not telling you or things have been boiling over for awhile. I would just not pursue him or chase him. Live your life. If he comes back into it, decide what to do from there
    1 point
  7. He is being hypocritical. I would ignore it for now.
    1 point
  8. If his family magically decided to accept you, don't think this would be the last time they would be overly involved in your lives, and do expect he'd be laying himself flat like a doormat to be trampled by them. Whether it be true they are doing this, or a lie because he thinks it's easier breaking up with you, both are clear messages he doesn't value you enough to continue building a life with you. What are you? 30? So you're going to forego dating for years hoping the mama's boy will change into Prince Charming? Never rely on major changes from anybody because it rarely happens. W
    1 point
  9. Usually, when people use the Family Card, they’re just using family as the scapegoat to get out of a relationship instead of telling you the real reason. I feel there’s more to this story than just his family’s disapproval based on the information given. Either way, you are better off without him. You don’t want to marry a man who doesn’t have a backbone to future in-laws. EDIT: Ok 7 month relationship? Yep, this one’s a doozy.
    1 point
  10. Geo shouldn't even be an option, he is someone else's husband. Leave him alone and date the second guy who is actually single.
    1 point
  11. He's not in any place to have a relationship if his family has this much control over him. Sorry hon, but this is not likely to work out well. I would respectfully part ways so you can heal and find a guy isn't part of toxic family drama. You're too young to put yourself on hold for this.
    1 point
  12. How long did you date? You cannot be friends if there are feelings. You need to go no contact.
    1 point
  13. You are really talking as if you're both high school kids and minors his parents have full legal and influential control over him. He's an adult in his mid 20's and he can do what he wants. So really it's him that made the decision to listen to them and let them completely control him. He could have at least tried to stand up to them and fight for your relationship, but he didn't. The family all sound unstable and not like good people at all. If he found someone he loves and he's happy, how dare they ruin that for him! They're extremely selfish. Just because his ex cheated on him doesn't
    1 point
  14. From what you wrote, I'm pretty sure that Geo was married to his wife all along and he was just having an affair. He was keeping you a secret, which is why he blocked you and ghosted you. Maybe the wife was getting suspicious, so he cut you off. If he still always lived with his wife, no divorce and acting really dodgy too, he wasn't separated. You have very clear evidence that Geo is a liar and can't be trusted, and also not serious about you. Regarding the other man, he sounds lovely and genuine, but if you don't actually love him, I don't think you should continue with him. It sounds
    1 point
  15. I recall your first post and my sense that you were in the role of being passive in your romantic relationships. I can't help but wonder if your daughter had a voice in all of this what she might say. Your history of succumbing to being ill due to stress. A boyfriend with money issues and now one who's possibly controlling. Is it possible your daughter has good reason to be concerned or is she just mysteriously controlling where you're concerned?
    1 point
  16. So sorry you are going thru all of this. i was stuck in a similar situation awhile back. Very manipulative ex. She never hesitated to show her worst side. And would use the kids as weapons of mass destruction. What I finally realized is that He was allowing it to happen. Because (in my circumstance) she had instilled in him massive guilt over the divorce, over "abandoning his children" - which was not at all the reality. But She convinced him AND the kids that everything was his fault. He was always trying to make it up to the children (who took advantage of the situation) and allowed the ex
    1 point
  17. I was thinking the same thing. You have a controlling boyfriend and now also a controlling daughter? As bluecastle states so eloquently: ..." there is only one person who has control over you, and that is in fact you."
    1 point
  18. I do wonder to some degree if she maybe has a point on the men you are dating. Dating someone who has been financially irresponsible and also someone is is outspoken on a first meeting, is questionable, to be fair. If she felt disrespected, that's not good. I mean, first impressions are everything and really can make or break a situation with family. It's quite possible as well that she doesn't feel you're responsible either due to allowing yourself to be hospitalized a few times over something like becoming dehydrated. Don't get me wrong, I do think she has anxiety issues that
    1 point
  19. I'm sorry about all this. I admit I can't help but read this without thinking of your post from a few days ago, in which you felt your boyfriend was being controlling. Now it's your daughter. Hard not to wonder if there's a bigger root here that you're struggling to find, one in which, for whatever reasons, you have a tendency to feel controlled by those close to you. Have you ever explored it all from that angle, either internally or with some guidance? Or do you think your previous post was a reflection of internalizing some of your daughter's view on you? In terms of the specifi
    1 point
  20. Any man who is not divorced...is not divorced. I am afraid that you are the side piece. The only solution is to leave him. He blocked you so you couldn't text or call when he was with his wife - so she wouldn't see you call/text/
    1 point
  21. Step one: Dump the cheater and block him. Step two: Slow things way down with Jack. This guy is telling what ever you want to hear to get you. If Jack cares about you he will wait and let things progress naturally. You know Geo is a cheater and has been long before he met you. I wonder how many other women has has as a side chick. This is actually a pretty easy choice. Lost
    1 point
  22. Holy cow, you really believe this crap coming from Geo? The guy is MARRIED! I bet his wife doesn't know their marriage is toast and she is getting divorced! You are being conned and lied to totally! Wake up! Jack is too much too fast. Forget both of them and sort yourself out.
    1 point
  23. I agree with limichelle. Take a time out. Jack seems ablaze with glory on a white horse because Geo is failing. It's a bit like seeing water on a dry day but why have water when you can have wine? Take your time. Enjoy the ride. Don't jump from one situation to another. The problem is you're unhappy with this married man and vulnerable. It's okay to acknowledge that and to feel sad.
    1 point
  24. It sounds like you need some time to not date anybody right now. You’re settling on Jack because he’s different then Geo, and you’re staying with Geo because you can’t fully have him. I think you like the chase and hunt when it comes to Geo. So please be single.
    1 point
  25. Let's break this down to reality. Your bf and the father of your 4 month old child prostituted himself to a coworker for $1,250 per month for 4 months. He is not a good man and he does not love you as shown by his actions. Always trust the actions of someone not their words. Make sure his name is on the birth certificate and file for child support since he kicked you out after you flirted with some guy online. There is no advice we can give you to make him an honest trustworthy man and there is nothing you can do to turn him into a guy anyone can trust. He is a cheater, liar
    1 point
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