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Showing content with the highest reputation on 12/06/2018 in all areas

  1. I was just repeating what you wrote. As a parent you should take time out of your work schedule if something happens during the day. I work full time too, and like you I just started a new job, but sometimes things like holiday concerts, book fairs, etc happen during the day and you have to take a few hours off. My point was to rearrange your priorities. Like maybe stop flying to another state for some guy who doesn’t seem very committed to you and take those three hours that you would have been flying and hang out with your kid. Or work on yourself. The guy seems too important to you, b
    1 point
  2. That's quite a leap...from "let's just go with the flow" and getting annoyed with you for asking to him wanting to get engaged. I know you are hoping for that, but you're afraid to even ask him anything about the future for fear of running him off! And what if he did "run off"? Don't you want to know if he's committed and sees you in his future? Wouldn't you want to know if he doesn't?
    1 point
  3. This is beyond nuts. You can so easily put a stop to this nonsense by simply blocking and deleting any and ALL contact you have with her on whatever social media it is you are on. Unfriend. Block. Simple as that. I can't understand why you have not done so. If she wants to discuss the children with their father then she needs to go through HIM, not YOU. It shouldn't be this hard. As long as YOU ALLOW this, by continuing contact with her every day, you can expect a life filled with major control and drama. YOU need to step out of the picture completely. Anything to do with the children
    1 point
  4. Thanks for you reply. But let's say I am faced with a stressful job. Would hate for it to effecting dating. Shouldn't I be open about it the stress levels with someone. Even if it is early days? Funny the fact you say this has struck with me with understanding the situation with "rushing". As the first time he invited me over for lunch and a "cuddle" he was thrown off as his flat mate was never meant to be home. Hence th first and only episode of PE. But all the times he had an episode with the ED was when we didn't have th flat to ourselves. Never put the two and two t
    1 point
  5. Have you heard the term "bunny boiler"? Well that is her.
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  6. Then why in the name of all that is good are you catering to her? Do you not know how to say "NO?"
    1 point
  7. OK bc, gonna call you out a bit on this; per your last post on OceanMoon's thread, the one I responded to, wherein you posted that fire in woman's belly confronting you, pushing you a bit, turns you on. So may I ask why you're still in a spin with your "sort of" ex? Why not take your own advice and confront, let her see that fire in YOUR belly, telling her you think she's being a bit ridiculous (again per your post on OM's thread)? I don't recall reading that you ever did that, you just sort of allow yourself to remain in this "spin," the unknown, the uncertainty. Does remaining in t
    1 point
  8. It sounds like she hasn't accepted the divorce and wants to know who "the other women" is. She sounds a bit psycho.
    1 point
  9. The proof is in the pudding where your priorities are. You don't respect your husband, but you like living off his money. I call full bs on 'I'm still living there for the sake of my daughter, and until I can save up." That's not for your daughter. That's for you, so you can continue to not be responsible for yourself, continue to have all this free time to feel sorry for yourself and fool around. You won't have time to be getting involved in all this if you were working and building a life for you and your daughter.
    1 point
  10. The guy's not even around. He's gone. The relationship is over and he's a ghost. That makes the breakup easier. Just block him, delete him, erase him so you never have to hear from him again.
    1 point
  11. Well I think that's true of all three of you at this point... don't blame her for taking advantage, simply take responsibility by setting a boundary. Let her know that you feel uncomfortable with being put in the middle of the two of them and then stop responding to her messages.
    1 point
  12. I so agree with this! I didn’t want to say too much about your kid situation, as I don’t know the background, but why would you move to a different city from your kid? I’m a single mom, and my daughter is with me 24/7, I can’t imagine moving away from her ever. Think of what your son might think— oh mom is moving to a new city to be with a guy... a guy who doesn’t even respect her! Sorry to be harsh.
    1 point
  13. You said you had stayed in the marriage for the sake of your daughter, yet you get involved in this mess. Doesn't sound like your daughter was a thought at all. How do you think she will feel when she learns of this mess? How about getting a divorce from your husband , focusing on your child and getting a job. This guy is no prize.
    1 point
  14. Who cares about him stinging or what he thinks? You're putting your time and energy and thoughts into a scumbag versus making plans on how to leave an unhealthy marriage. If you have this much time on your hands, like the other poster said, make plans for a career so you can be financially stable after the divorce. Start getting a resume together, or get enrolled into classes to prepare you for a career. Remove your husband's name from your credit cards and bank account. See a lawyer. Get your priorities straight.
    1 point
  15. Exactly! I have no idea why the OP's obsessing over why she asked theses questions and why she was no longer interested. All he mentioned was dating. Yes her questions were excessive but they are normal questions. I don't think it ever warranted him flying off at her with them. I am a women. After two dates I have decided to not pursue it anymore. Even after asking some of the questions I use to weed out the "f**k boys". I don't even believe she didn't want to continue dating based on his answers. Sometimes you don't continue dating as you are not "feeling it" for a number
    1 point
  16. You were only dating a year and a half - on and off- yet you were fighting for half of that. That doesn’t sound like a long and happy relationship. It sounds like you just miss being in a relationship, not him. Don’t let him suck you back in to something you should not go back to.
    1 point
  17. Ok... you aren’t going to like my post - but I’ll be straight with you. In every bad situation there is a silver lining. The silver lining in your situation is this woman. It’s with HER that your loyalties should lie. You should not be looking to stab her in the back. Your marriage is over. I agree... long over. You are looking for an escape route. The thing is... no amount of “savings” (short of retirement-level savings in the hundreds of thousands of dollars) will help you move out. You need a steady income (ie: a job). This should be your first focus so that you can move forward in a
    1 point
  18. Oh dear... if it's any consolation, it doesn't sound as though you're ready for another relationship. You haven't given yourself enough time to get past your breakup, learn from it and move on. I've been in the situation where there has been a breakup, and either I've immediately started a terrible crush on someone who isn't available, or I've jumped quickly into another relationship. Both of them are ways of avoiding the pain of the breakup - but that is exactly what you need to do, to become really available again. As to what to do at work... keep dressing up and putting on makeup. Be
    1 point
  19. Great advice ^^. I'm sorry for what you're going through, truly. I know it hurts, and understand the urge to demonize when the pain is most acute. But in the grander scheme holding onto bitterness, creating a narrative in which you were played by the devil, will not serve you at all. It will keep you feeling played, victimized, and odds are high that you'll carry that resentment over into new relationships and life in general. It's not a good look. It's not a good way to live. It's a way of finding comfort and power by, ironically, focusing on the ways you're disempowered. Breakups
    1 point
  20. This is the guy that you always have to travel to, and makes pay your own expenses for the flights? You have created three threads on this within the last few weeks.
    1 point
  21. Look, I do understand, I actually know that it's hard for men to meet women online and to get many replies, but I think your behaviour is not great to be honest. I know that the woman was acting like she was interrogating you but your own behaviour was really full-on too. It's not good to be desperate and people can sense desperation, trust me. I've done a fair bit of online dating and most of the time it doesn't work out because you're meeting a complete stranger. If I went on this forum every time an online date didn't work out, you'd see hundreds of posts here from me about online dating. I
    1 point
  22. It's not about protecting her feelings, it's about recognizing that being in a relationship doesn't entitle anyone to ask intrusive and stupid questions. So such a question, in my book, deserves no response.
    1 point
  23. Why can’t your bf just deal with her directly? I just don’t understand why you have to be involved?
    1 point
  24. All that ice cream and doughnuts before bed? Seriously? It is like he is throwing it in your face. This may sound harsh and I do agree with Wiseman that it may take drastic moves on your part to get his attention. So he is obviously going to continue getting bigger and closer to a heart attack or stroke (it really is a matter or when, not if he will have one) and then what? If he is happy like he is and you are miserable there are only a couple of options left. You now see you have zero control over his choices and all your efforts have gone in vain so now you need to consider
    1 point
  25. Well, you don't want to be rude, but you have to hold your ground. When she calls, you say, you're busy right now and she should call her ex. Whatever issue she calls about, you say "you need to talk to X about that." And you have to do it that way. "I really can't talk to you right now, call X." You're not being rude. You're handling her phone calls like a secretary. Don't engage with her. Don't be her buddy. She is trying to poison your mind against your boyfriend as a way of getting back at him and trying to break you up. She is not trying to be cordial. Just take a message or
    1 point
  26. Of course they are and of course she is. She's successfully interjected full time into what should be a private relationship between you and your boyfriend because you'd rather whine than take responsibility for asserting your own boundaries. You don't need a relationship with her even should you get to the point of being involved in his children's lives. It would be on him to appropriately facilitate the dynamic between you and they, not her. You can't please everyone. If she's going to be upset because you tell her you no longer want to serve as an intermediary, that's what's goi
    1 point
  27. I’d block her from all social media, and tell your boyfriend you don’t want to be stuck in the middle of this anymore. It really should be only your bf dealing with her, not you. You’ve tried to help, but it sounds like she’s taking advantage. I’d step away, and let your bf handle everything involving her from this point forward.
    1 point
  28. On the legality front, read the paperwork you signed when you started working. It will specifically mention the requirements for alerting the organization of your resignation (it may not suffice to do verbal, email, or emailing your manager only depending not he company). I have always made sure to email and cc: (or alternatively print out hard copies of my resignation) to both my immediate manager and HR. If all else fails, alerting HR is always “official” since they are the ones that deal with the legalities and paperwork of starting/stopping employment. So if you haven’t already, ensure
    1 point
  29. Did you send it with a receipt notification? If not, send a duplicate in print by mail with a delivery receipt requested or by certified mail. Give her a chance to process this before reacting. Emails don't require immediate responses. Head high.
    1 point
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