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About Me

  1. As a parent, watching your child reach the physically and emotionally challenging milestone of adolescence can be difficult. Trying to navigate tactics and behaviors to successfully tackle this metamorphic period when it comes to the additional terrains of Autism can feel like a daunting and even frightening task. Parents may be overwhelmed with concerns and questions related to the sudden behavior changes their child may display, to issues related to their social interaction and emotional growth, or to possible interactions therapies, treatments, or specific education are to bring about within these life stages. It is important to communicate clearly with other colleagues such as teachers involved in your child’s care, and also to remember that like typically developing children, there is no one size fits all for managing an Autistic child’s development during puberty. Transparency, support and patience are essential in this process. It is important to keep in mind, that even if their behavior seems to you impractical and illogical, it does not make it wrong. That being said, boundaries, communication and consistency must be maintained to ensure that the mutually agreed-upon expectations are met. It will take time, patience, and an open mindset to establish the best way to communicate with and to help a child who has Autism. A sense of safety is often paramount especially in early puberty transition stages, and setting up secure playgrounds to practice social boundaries and acceptable behaviors can help smooth the process and make it easier to reflect on the new experiences they face. To that end, parents should encourage positive support systems such as hobby groups, sports classes, summer camps and much more, to foster a safe environment to get a child out of their comfort zone. Absolutely none of these activities should ever be forced upon the child, but quite the opposite – show them how fun, engaging and exciting new activities can be. Communication and Transparency need to go two ways - Investing in books and reading materials appropriate for the age of the individual can go incredibly far in both understanding the emotions, behaviors and situations faced by autistic adolescents and to create a sense of openness and dialogue between parents and their child. Many libraries and bookstores have a vast selection of titles dedicated to providing clear visual and creative explanation as to struggling orders and behaviours a child might face. Books that provide scenarios can be effective in addressing very complex concepts and encourage discourse and conversation between parents, peers and their autistic or differently abled friends. It is important to take into account that for some autistic adolescents, understanding the full intricacies of the changes that come with puberty can be difficult and overwhelming. Making explanations as simple and natural as possible will help to open dialogue paths towards better exposure and acknowledgement of the experiences ahead of them. The use of visuals and encouragement of them to ask questions can aid in helping them gain a better understanding of puberty and any anxieties that come with it. Even though parenting a child on the spectrum can be overwhelming, stressful and at times seemingly unsurmountable, taking proper consideration into account, respecting and adapting to their individual needs, giving guidance without excessive pressure and striving - and expecting - to create an environment in which the child can feel comfortable to explore, foster and grow in their own, unique ways while still keeping shared expectations and boundaries in place, can help those involved in the care of the child to find a balance where everyone can coexist happily and peacefully.
  2. When your child expresses an interest in having one of their parents visit and not the other, it can leave you feeling unsure about the best way to handle the situation. How you respond could have lasting effects and could cause feelings of guilt, resentment, or even anger. It’s important to remember that your child may be trying to work out their own emotions in regards to the relationship with their parent. If your child has made clear that they don’t want their other parent to join them for a visit, it’s important to consider why. Take the time to sit down and talk to them about it in an open and non-judgmental manner. Be sure to also let them know that you are there to listen and offer support. It’s possible that they may be feeling hurt or afraid and want to avoid seeing their other parent. Having a chance to express themselves could help to provide insight into how your child is feeling and how the relationship between their parents is impacting them. It’s also important not to take sides in the situation. It’s natural to want to validate and protect your child, but it’s important to remember that both parents are important figures in your child’s life. Encourage your child to try to build healthy relationships with both parents and to not feel guilty if they want to see one parent more than the other. From a practical standpoint, it’s essential to explain that it’s not always possible for parents to only see the children together. Setting ground rules ahead of time and creating a respectful atmosphere can help ensure that the visits take place without incident. Focus on creating a scenario where both parents can feel included even if one parent won’t physically be present. Make sure to come up with a plan that is agreeable to both parents and that ensures the safety and comfort of your child. Allow your child to experience a sense of control by having them be involved in the decision making process. Ask them what type of visitary structure would work best for them and what activities or places they would like to do with parents in the future. Demonstrating that you are taking their feelings into consideration will help them feel respected and supported. It can be difficult for any parent to accept their children’s desire for their other parent not to be involved in a visit. However, listening to your child’s wishes and helping to create a safe environment for them is the best course of action. Taking the time to talk to your children openly, setting expectations mutually with the other parent, and being respectful of different perspectives can go a long way to helping your child navigate their complicated emotions.
  3. No one in this world loves me. I'm not close to my moms family and I live my life alone with no family around me. I got in contact with my estranged father after 20 years of no contact and found out that he has a 10 year old daughter. I made a mistake and looked him up on Facebook and his daughter is extremely beautiful. There are so many pictures of them out and about doing things and I developed this toxic jealousy against her and I feel terrible about it. I'm realizing he will never love me as much as he loves her. She's his little girl. Not me. He doesn't even know me. He attempts to message me almost every day but its normally just small talk. I want this relationship to work out but I struggle with the fact that he is very capable of living life without me. He did it for 20 years. What should I do about this?
  4. What to expect? my parents think boudoir photography will make me look cheap they think it is the same as glamour modelling
  5. When I was little boy, my parents bought a book about nature. It taught me many things, from collecting rocks to watching birds. Suddenly I wanted to be a biologist or a geologist. I wanted to travel the world, camp in the woods, watch the colors of the world. Then my parents bought another book about scientific facts and discoveries. With it I learned a lot about physics, from gravity to electricity. I was sure I wanted to be a scientist. I wanted to make cool inventions like the transistor or the telescope. Then my parents bought a computer. I started designing and programming. Everything could be created and tested virtually, without any consequences to the real world. I was going to be a great computer and software engineer. It was so cool to build anything out of nothing. Sometime after that, my sister started studying nursing and I read several of her books. Being a nurse was so cool. It was like being a biologist, a scientist and an engineer all at the same time, fixing ailments and creating wellness out of nothing. Time was running and I had to make a choice. I chose to be a nurse. I wasn’t completely happy with that decision, but I couldn’t spend the rest of my life looking for a career. I graduated. I got a job. I got married. My wife and I, we’re happy together but we still think we’re not ready for parenthood. Now I work as a full time ward nurse. I get to help a few people, some go home better, some die. It’s a job where half of my effort disappears with people. It’s an OK job. I do for people whatever they need at their worst moments in life but, sometimes, people go and I’m left with doubts. Every day I need an escape plan to forget the hospital. I used to come home and take care of my garden. I sowed all the grass, planted some trees and grew corn, tomatoes, watermelons and peppers. Due to some awkward and heavy tasks in my job, when I get home, my back and legs are in pain, so I don’t garden that often anymore. I had great fun playing videogames, imagining that I had free will, being a space soldier, saving the galaxy, romancing an alien. In the end, videogame writers managed to spoil five years of fantasy. I no longer play videogames. I find them repetitive, unrealistic, limited. It was time for a real hobby. I was going to be an amateur radio enthusiast. I bought a radio and started logging broadcast stations, ham operators and utility signals from all over the world. Very soon my radio died due to a static discharge on a very tiny chip. Shortwave stations around the world are dying too due to budget cuts. Religion is dead. People no longer gather together, there’s too much of everything – too many options. Technology is not connecting us, it is scattering us. Now I go outside at night leaving everything behind to look at the sky. I no longer look at it with the same awe. It’s just a huge black unknown filled with opportunities, wishes, dreams. It makes me feel unique but forgotten, unused. Suddenly, I understand. I am a stargazer. I am not meant to create, develop or imagine. I am only supposed to enjoy all that is around me. Time will pass. Generations will come. Everything and everyone will be replaced and forgotten. I'm just a forgotten stargazer.
  6. This is my first post on here. I can honestly say I don't want to be here anymore. Im 18 and my life doesn't seem to get better. My life gets worse daily. I have friends but because of prior things that happened in my life I feel I can't trust anyone. I have so much inside of me but don't trust anyone to talk to. I have no emitions because of being hurt in the past/present. I put up a wall and let no one in. I hate college. My parents might even being taking me out of college and I don't know why. My dad is cheating on my mom and my whole family knows about this. My mom cheated on my dad with my sisters, friends, dad. I can't talk to my parents cause I feel I can't trust them. I hate being home in my house. I get angry and the littlest things and I can't stand it anymore. Why go through all of this? Doesn't seem worth it to me... p.s. Sorry for any spelling/grammer mistakes. Don't feeling like proof reading right now.
  7. Hey all. I am a college student and im sure that from other people looking at me they think that i have everything, well not everything, but i am well off. Not money wise... i mean i am in college, my parents are still paying for everything, im in a sorority, i have a boyfriend. Why am i not happy? I feel as though i dont know where i want to go in life, i dont know what i want to do. Im struggeling in my classes, sometimes i cant be bothered to go because i just dont want to be around people. Last year i went out all of the time and i had the time of my life! This year i never want to go out and be social. I just want to sit at home and think, stress, and worry. Although i hate to say it, i think that my boyfriend is playing a major role in this. We started seeing each other this past july and granted things have moved really fast. I stay at his house alll of the time and my parents dont know it, and im in love with him. Somteims i just wonder if he is who i should be with. He is an amazing guy and we are good for each other. He owns his own busieness, is sucessful, and good looking. However, his wife left him this past May. I know that they are never going to get back together, but sometimes i cant help but feel like the replacement wife. I know that he loves me, but i cant help bu t have these doubts. He has to drink at least three beers a day and he will even admit that he knows he has a problem with alcohol. It's not bad, it just gets aggrivating sometimes. He doesnt get drunk, he just likes to have a good buzz...................... i feel like my post is dragging and not getting my point accross... i wll just end it here because i could end up typing all night. Someone save me
  8. I am a 16 year old guy and I was caught by my parents smoking pot today with some of my friends. My older brother has gone through this sort of thing with drugs and partying and is currently in trouble for a DWI he got last summer. My parents have had to go through a lot with him and I don't want to do that. I don't want to hunt my parents like that but I don't want to stop smoking. It helps me relieve stress and it's just fun to do. I understand the conciquences of getting caught by my parents and the police and I have seen first hand how it can affect a family. Part of being a teenager is experimenting with different things, drugs being one of them, to figure out who they are. I dont really know what I am getting at with all this but I just wanted to vent some of my feelings.
  9. There was a time when I could have said It feels like we’ve known each other forever. Now, I might say It feels like we’ve never met. Friendships That feel like dreams— Did we really Once flop over in the yard, sitting cross-legged, sharing different shades of pink nail polish? Was it real when we Played hide and seek and hid in strangers’ back yards, feeling clever and triumphant and mischievous and hoping we weren’t still waiting to be found when the sun went down? Can you remember when we Argued over who got to be the pink Power Ranger? Isn’t it funny how we Wrote notes to each other in sparkly gold ink and folded them into cute little origami shapes? Wasn’t it weird when most of our conversations Were about boys and kissing and wanting to be all grown up? Wasn’t it strange when we Started getting into trouble?—not the kind of trouble where our parents grounded us, but when the police caught us and the judge sentenced us? Wasn’t it surprising When we realized they were all just memories, buried, fading, the way dreams begin to fade upon waking? Isn’t it sad how we Share these memories but It feels like we’ve never met?
  10. For the past year or so, my life hasn't been so good. I have had tons of issues recently that have nearly driven me to the point of madness. 1) I have no real friends. I've never really had one. I've always been socially distant and withdrawn. I won't let anyone close to me, and I have an impenetrable exterior. I don't feel like I can trust people. 2) I've always been astonishingly mature for my age. Despite my introverted ways, I have excellent social skills and I can communicate fabulously with adults. I had a 9th grade vocabulary level at age 12, and now I'm taking college language classes. 3) I can't communicate with people my age. Everytime I try to, it's always got some stupid problem like drugs, sex, parties, sports, and just basic drama in general. I don't understand why teenagers do stupid things that bring awful consequences upon them. I feel stupid when I converse with individuals in my class. 4) I'm straight, and I'm attracted to women, but the idea of romance and love to me has always seemed stupid. I've never been interested in being in a relationship. 5) I'm amazingly self-centered. I do things for me and only me. I do things my way. My opinion is the only one that matters (to me). Every thing I do basically benefits me. I don't want to have to worry about anyone else, or take care of anyone else but myself, which is probobly why I'm not suited for relationships. 6) My relationship with my parents is very "bi-polar." One day we will get along great, the next day, we're barking at eachother like a bunch of wild savages. My dad made me play sports for a while, something he loves and I don't care for. To me, sports have no point other than to achieve school pride, and to flash a sign over your head that says, "masculine." Both of which are stupid to me. I finally quit sports, and totally disobeyed my parents. My grandpa wouldn't talk to me for months, and slept outside with my dog until basketball season was over. 7) I'm incredibly intelligent. My IQ (according to my school counselor) was off the charts, but I have trouble applyng myself. Last year, I made straight A's. Nothing under an A actually, and the 3rd in my class. Now, I'm making B's (Which are okay), and C's (Which to me is unacceptable). 8) I have an attitude and respect problem. I'm incredibly cold-blooded and insubordinate. I believe I should not answer to earthly authority, and I don't feel that I'm supposed to show respect to anyone. 9) I turn to to material objects for stress relief. Reading superhero comics, and playing guitar and listening to music are my only ways of venting frustration. Any advice is appreciated.
  11. Ok I still no excuse for hitting a partner, that just degrades their self-esteem and the hitter isn't the winner, instead she/he's the loser. Now i'll share my story for the first time about my parents and yes at times I was made to be a witness, now thats silly, i know, they should solve, not have the kid as a witness. So here goes my story which had always happens ever since I was a kid and yes I still feel that's wrong. My story: Ok I wasn't raised in a violent environment, no, it was good loving parents. But see there was at times when mom would get piss and start scremaing and cursing, most of the times she would start it, and yes it got annoying and yes at times dad would lose it. I was a witness, I would hear her cursing and screaming and he would tell her "calm down" until it got to the point were he would say "SHUT UP ALREADY", not the right thing for a man to do, now I know better. And most of the times she wouldn't, thats when he would then spanked her, on few occasions it was with a belt, or a brush, or just a shove, but he never got to the point of actually slapping here or punching her in the face, it wasn't real serious. But still, I don't feel a man should put his hands on a woman just cuz she talks back or curses. Esp, he would do it when she would use slang word. This would go on at times. Some of the times dad was trying so hard but then he losses his temper if she persists on not shouting, which then off course it'll lead to her crying when he hitted (spanked her). And well, I used to be so blind for a long while manily cuz I would hear mom was the one who started witht he screamings. I use to think that he had already put up with mush and that it was time for her to shut up and that he did right, until when I turned 16. I started disagreeing when I read on article on the correct way for a man to win a fight when the g/f or wife is shouting and starts cursing. It say that the guy shosuln't raise his voice nor be abusive towards her cuz of that. Then I also start thinking that yes couples do fight. Another is at times as a joke he tells he "Oh shut up" when he feels she's saying something unimportant. And off course when at times both fought they would give me different versions, I don't go along with any. Mom tells me of how he's so abusive and dad says the same and tries to justify why he lose his temper and shove her or kick her. I still say thats no excuse, if she yells or screams, he could have walk out or counting system, anything to keep him from feeling like hitting her. And yea there's been few occasions last yr, when I had to intervined, he told me "You're witness here, look at the horrible things she's saying, look at the language, I'm about to or I feel like slapping her. I would tell him not to and that it's not the way u solve things. Well I would to continue but now I gotta go to college, just want to hear ur points. And no he didn't do the right thing is responding by getting physical when she got verbally. Though it happened a few times, I still feel he like low down her self-esteem.
  12. I am about to turn 14 yrs of age this december and i am pregnant. I cry every night because i think i need to abort it. I dont know how to tell my parents this. I really want to have this baby because i know I will take care of it and also it wont interfere with my future because i really look up to that and i think as a mother..i have to do this. But my boyfriend says i should abort it because my parents are going to go crazy. How can i tell my parents this? Someone please Help me. Im in desperate need of help.
  13. yesterday my new boyfriend introduced me to his parents. i overheard his mother say that i looked like a real fluzy. i don't know what it means but i'm sure it isn't anything nice. can someone tell me what it means?
  14. Hi. Im 17 years old. I recently got my first girlfriend and its not everything I thought it would be. I like her, but things are still so bad. Im getting bad grades and my parents said they wont help me pay for college unless I get good grades..and Im going to be done with high school by june. My parents recently read all of my online conversations and they read about me talking about some drugs I did and read about me calling my dad an a-hole and all this other stuff. My parents earlier this year caught me smoking cigarettes and they think I just started, even though I've done it for 3 years. If I wasnt addicted, I would've stopped, but I cant. I've tried. I got fired from my job that I enjoyed and am now at a terrible job with long hours and low pay. I drink alcohol about every weekend and get drunk every weekend. I almost got in trouble with the cops for it twice in a month. I've gone into this terrible way of living and looking at things, that it's become a habit I can not stop. Has anyone felt like this? Anyway, I dont wanna hear the same old speech about how it is wrong to kill yourself. I was just wondering if anyone knows any painless ways to kill yourself or least painful ways compared to other. I know it sounds cowardish, but frankly I dont care
  15. Do you think that it is possible to have love for two people at once? I don't mean like how parents have love for their children, because that is possible... but I'm speaking romantically.
  16. im a 16 year old kid from london uk. And basically im a top student whos gonna get good grades in my test this year etc. However I have been regulary late by like 10 secs each day to school. I thought this didnt matter, however my school have now told me I cannot continue to their six form, to do my next tests because of this. The problem is my parents expect me to go to this school as it is a good school and i believe they will not be too happy if i told them i didnt get in for such a small thing and i believe they will disown me and kick me out of my home. Can anyone help?
  17. Thanks for reading. I'm looking for unbiased advice. This has already been run by my parents who offered good but inconclusive advice. It only seems natural that I should share it with complete strangers now. Feel free to chastise, insult and give me your honest opinion of what a cad I am. If you could throw in a few constructive items that would help too. I'm getting married in 1 month. The invitations are out, the venue is booked and my Fiancee's parents have laid out 50k+ on all the arrangements. 325 People are expecting a wedding. Talk about pressure. My ex-fiancee and I broke up 5 years ago and I never stopped loving her. I'll try to keep descriptions of her as tame as possible (not sure what the decency rules on this board are), but she has an incredible physique and is a crazy woman during our private time. Or in some cases the not-so-private times. Ah, the memories... and the stories... Anyway, she's a beautiful blond bombshell with a good career as an attorney and we have definite chemistry. On the other hand she is not very well liked by my family and friends. In fact, because of her stand-offish attitude she is often not liked by anyone. She also isn't very good with money and balks at prolonged physical exertion (hiking, traveling, anything athletic). Her family hates me and I don't think much of them either. We don't talk much, she mostly just listens to what I say and gazes at me with her big blue eyes, nodding occasionally. She has very little personality. But she can be very sweet and did I mention she looks amazing in a bathing suit? If you haven't guessed yet, the Ex-fiancee is back in the picture. She's realized she made a huge mistake leaving 5 years ago and now wants to elope and spend the rest of our lives together. It's what I always wanted but seeing as I'm getting married in 30 days to another woman, the timing could have been a bit better. My bride-to-be is a great woman in her own way. She is good with money and has a very stable financial future. She makes 3 times my salary and I do quite well by myself. She is smart, conversational, engaging and shares my same political/social views. She will be a wonderful mother some day. Although she's an attractive woman, she doesn't even approach my ex-fiancee. We have no chemistry and our "special private time" is non-existent. I spend many nights coming up with excuses not to be intimate. In the 4 years I've been dating my bride-to-be, I've spent time on and off with my ex-fiancee. That makes me a terrible person, I know. I believe that the ex-fiancee's renewed expressions of love are heartfelt. Should I stay the course and let the powerful current of my life take me into a passionless marriage? Should I shirk my responsibilities and go back to the woman I never stopped loving and have freaky "special private time"? Or should I look to door number 3; the empty unknown of bachelorhood in my 30s. Thanks.
  18. Just wrote this to vent in a better way than punching the wall. Not sure it even qualifies as poetry, but here it is anyway: You expect perfection You expect servitute You expect things to suddenly change You see the best result in your mind You blame everyone but yourself when it's not achieved You think you deserve the best because you are a parent You are naive You shout out your demands and empty threats You believe repeating earlier failiures will make a success You work many hours a day which I thank you for You have no right to take out your anger out on others because of it You gave me life, I never asked for it You can't expect gratitude from someone who no longer wants it //C.E.
  19. *** Read my 2 year update on page 2, after this *** I have dated the same girl for going on 9 years now. I am 25, we started dating at 16, neither of us have been with another person. Over the last 4 years I have been having major problems going deeper into the relationship. I don't want to marry her because I am too unsure. she has lied to me ALOT in the past, but she was young. We have broken up several times over the last few years, because I'm mostly unhappy dealing with all of her "how do you feel about me etc?" questions. I'm worried that I suffer from "grass is greener" on the other side complex. I constanlty find myself wanting to be with other girls physically. It's so hard for me to want to stay. I feel so shallow because I want a younger, prettier girl or one that has some sort of future. I hate her family and she hates nearly everything that is funny to me. I feel stressful around her but can't leave because I'm afraid to be alone. I have stayed with her too long and feel like I can never find another now. All of our friends and families on both sides tell us to split up because they can see we are not happy... I'm just so worried that I will not be able to find another girl better then her. She really is obsessed with me and I'm afraid she will kill herself if I leave. She has said this in the past and I believe her. I really just want a break to see other people and possibly return in the future. She said this is cruel and she could not handle it. To top it off, I'm 25 years old and have problems getting erections with her already... I think it's because she gained 50 pounds and I'm bored of her or hate her truly... In her defense: she is very sweet and innocent she would be good with children she is fairly pretty, chubby, not really fat more background: my parents and her parents was us to break up and so do all of eachothers friends she hates all of my friends neither of us are really active or do much outside of dinner,movies occasional vacation neither of our hobbies coincide, but not many girls like pc games/marine life and boring techincal ******, nor do men really enjoy crafts and shopping online we do like alot of the same movies we argue about finances AND WE DONT EVEN LIVE TOGETHER by the way. I dont really know if I love her. Past breakups: immediate feelings no crying from me, I actually usually felt relieved around 2 weeks of being alone, I start to flip out, get drunk and get incredibly horny and call her... this results in it starting all over again. How do you even break up with someone after this long? What if I broke up, dated other girls and realized that I really did love her? I need advice, preferably from older men with longterm relationship experience
  20. In an effort to find out where the problem of shyness originates from, I have come to the conclusion that: (1) there is a strong corelation between whether you were brought up by a single mother, a single father, or both parents. Those who were raised by a single mother tend to be the shy ones while those raised by both parents can be either shy or extroverted depending on which parent had more influence on them. (2) shyness is related to how possessive the parent was during the child's formative years i.e. whether or not the child was allowed to go out and play with other toddlers/kids or kept inside all the time. (3) a dominant older brother/sister who is opinionated, arrogant and loves to have the last say could also cause the younger siblings to become withdrawn and grow up to be shy and introverted. Edit: do to the overwhelming number of people who have stated this, I will also add (4) parents not having friends (i.e also shy), can unwittingly school their children to be shy. (5) a physically/sexually abusive parent can totally erode a child's confidence and make them shy. So shy guys (and girls) share your experiences and your thoughts on this one!
  21. Hey i need some help. I have really messed up parents like they are demented. I'm 17 in DEC and im going for my licence next week, so far i learned that im not allowed to drive out of my town and not allowed to drive without a destination. I'm not allowed to have a job in another town, regardless if i have to find a way to pay for half of the insurance. Now, im not a druggy or jock at my school i get all A's and B's for grades. I don't do anything wrong. All the rest of my friends have their licences and ask if i wanna chill but i can't because my parents don't know them. The other kids drive around like they have all day just having fun, enjoying the road. I've had my permit for 10 months and at the last minute they made me take 30 hours of driving school even though im by the instructors point of view "way to experienced to be in this class". I wasnt planning on abusing my licence, but to use it to get a childhood as i've never been allowed to do much of anything. I try talking to them frequently about allowing me to have some slack and they agree ya know the usual sure sure sure.... and end up completely discarding the convorsation. I can't go hang out with my friends down town, and no im not in like harlem i live in a rural town in the middle of no where. I'm not allowed up past 10 o' clock and they are lazy too. They never drive me to friends houses and always have something to complain about. So now im psycologically deprived of needs that i need for my future as an adult. I got some of it only because since they don't allow me to do much of anything besides go to school, im on the internet all day and night or on my cell phone. I'm real glad i got NEXTEL's free incoming minutes other wise i would be royally f_____. Oh yeah did i mention i have to be home at 9:30pm ON THE WEEKENDS.And having a girlfriend is just peachy, so they can spy every five minutes on us and ruin it. Not even allowed to have a girl over my house, it has to be a planned activity regardless that they never drive me out of town which is about 10 minutes at the max of driving, in addition i have a walmart and ....thats it in my town. So now that i've rambled about my deprived life what most kids can't wait for, their licence, i couldnt give a flying F about it whether i pass or fail. For the way this is going i don't know why i invested all this time into trying to get it in the first place. I'm actually depressed about it. I'ts like someone is making me pay 1500 dollars to let me stay at home and continue doing nothing. when they asked why i smoked i gave them a blank stare (take a wild guess). I just need some input, help, or something here. I'm such a wimp i never got the chance to say i won't put up with it,or well i did and it ment nothing. Someone please help me. Am i supposed to wait till im 18 or something? Please help 911
  22. Looking back on my life, I honestly can't remember the last time I told my parents I love them. Now that they're not here with me (out of town) I think about things like this. Hell, I can't remember the last time I told ANYONE I love them. I don't think I've ever said it to my sisters. This can't be normal. I've always had an odd relationship with my family. I've had many rough patches but we're still close. Maybe this is why I'm so hesitant to say it in relationships.
  23. my "family" is messed up. i've been denying this to myself for a long time. it's the last thing i want to admit but i cant hold it in any longer. lately, i've been getting up at 6 am to go to work every morning for a few hours. after that i rush off to class by commuting which is 2 hours to and from. my parents drive me to the train station because it's about an 1 hour away and then i take the train up. well, today, coming back from school, i got on the train going the opposite direction. i went all the way to the end destination and then had to ride the train back which delayed it for a very very long time. i was exhausted being on that train. the worst part was when i reached the end of that ride. my parents were mad because they had to wait so long. so now.....out comes the emotional punishment, the silent treatment, not talking to me, stonewalling, acting righteous, accusations of me doing it on purpose, threats. this isnt NORMAL reactions. and it's all because my "dad" is an immature toad. right now, the house is tension and pain and so much emotional guilt and pain and anguish placed on my shoulders because of what i did. but it was a mistake on my part....i mean, i didnt mean to go the opposite way but im so exhausted i wasnt thinking straight. but i have a lot of screwed up issues and problems......and this contributes to it. or mabe it's because of stuff like this that's the cause of it. if i am ever a parent, i vow not to be like them. i felt like i had to grow up on my own in every way. not physically because physically i was dependent on them for food and shelter. but emotionally i never had anyone to talk to.......socially, i never had role models because they tell me to get rid of everyone.....anything i had to deal with growing up i had to learn on my own because they never protected me.
  24. Here's my story so far ... I met a wonderful girl and after a week of dating, she told me she had a 5yr old daughter. At first, I wasn't sure about our relationship but I gave it a chance and I'm glad I did. After several months, I can honestly say I'm in love and want to spend the rest of my life with her and her daughter. My problem is my parents bitterly disapprove of my relationship. You see, I'm an Asian male and my parents are very traditional. They would rather die than see me continue my relationship with this girl. This has placed a lot of stress on myself, my family and my relationship. I know my parents are acting irrationally and I've tried to convince them that they have to let me live my own life and be happy for me. I've even told my mom that if she loves me unconditionally, she would want me to be happy. She said she wanted me to be happy but would never accept my girlfriend and her daughter. This really hurts because I would do anything for my parents but will not give up my happiness and my life. I've even told them that if I did let go, I would resent them for my rest of my life and they seemed to be okay with that. My sadness has almost turned into anger and hate. I just can't understand why my own parents cannot be happy for me when everyone I know is. They keeping begging me to reconsider my decision to be with her and continue to make me feel guilty about disrespecting them. I don't know what to do or think anymore. This sadness and anger has affected my life and I'm afraid it'll start affecting my relationship with my girlfriend. My girlfriend says she'll stand by me no matter what but is deeply hurt and worried about my relationship with my family. I've been thinking about cutting off ties completely until my parents can start thinking rationally and start talking to me with an open-mind but at the same time, I don't think their stubborness will allow this. I seriously believe my mother would go insane or die of stress if I don't comply with their wishes. I just wish I had some support from my family through all of this ... Thanks for reading.
  25. i have a wonderfull girlfriend that i have been dating for 5 months now. Every thing about our relationship is perfect. We have never gotten into a fight and we seem to agree on just about everything. We are able to work things out all the time. My girlfriend lived with her real parents until she was 5 years old. Her parents were drug abusers and she was put into foster care because of neglect. she was moved around countless times to different homes by the foster care program until she was adopted. she now lives with very great family and has caring parents. She recently mentioned that when she lived with her biological parents, she was regulary sexualy abused when she was 5 by a 17 year old stepbrother. Since she has said that i have not been able to stop thinking about it. I feel sad and sick just thinking of her going through somthing so horrible. i feel like i should do somthing to comfort her and make her feel better. she has said that its hard for her to talk about it. so i would like to know what i should do to let her know how i feel and that she can talk to me about it. i feel like it would be strange to say this thought because she has allready gone through therepy for this and becasue it happened so long ago. please give me some advice?
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