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  1. Hi all. I've read a few posts to see anyone else had a similar situation but came up with no luck. I'll try and keep it short (I know it wont be ).. We've been together for 6 months and live about 90 miles apart. We got close real fast and grew to love each other deeply. Recently, the distance has gotten hard and we've had some problems. She is blaming me for not appreciating her. I can admit to some of that so I was going to surprise her for VDay. She had grad school so it was not possible for us to see each other on VDay. Well, I talked to her roomates and they gave me the ok to come up and surprise her. I got to her house at about 8 last night and she was supposed to be done with grad school at 8:30.... My surprise was individual cards telling her what I loved about her from her garage door to all the way to her bedroom where I would be waiting. While I was setting up my surprise, I noticed a 2nd boquet of flowers (I had sent some to her work also). I thought nothing of it as it could have been her roomates....well while in her bedroom, I noticed another VDay card from another guy. Right away my heart dropped and I started crying...I called her at 8:30 when she should have been done with school...no answer....time keeps passing so I turn on her PC monitor to check some basketball scores and there it is....an IM window, still on the screen, of sexual comments, flirting, etc. 9:30 rolls around and I call again...nothing. So I text her at about 9:50 saying, "You must be avoiding me, you need to call me asap...I'm in your room" She got home about 5 minutes after that. I've gone on long enough so to be concise, she denied sleeping with him. She admitted to talking to him and kissing him. She says she loves me and doesnt want to be with him and wants to be with me. I dont believe that she didnt sleep with him. I'm not sure what kind of advice I'm seeking here...maybe I just wanted to vent. I love her and want to be with her but I can't get the things I read on her IM out of my mind. I'm so confused
  2. Ah, Valentine's Day—the holiday that can either make hearts flutter or induce a sense of dread. Whether you're a hopeless romantic or a love skeptic, there comes a time when you might want to take the plunge and ask someone to be your Valentine. But how do you do it? Is there a perfect way to put your heart on the line without tripping over your words or, worse, facing rejection? In this comprehensive guide, we will navigate the labyrinthine corridors of affection and interpersonal dynamics to help you understand how to ask someone to be your Valentine. We'll touch on everything from the classic handwritten note to the modern-day digital message, weighing the pros and cons of each. You'll get tips on timing, crafting the perfect message, and even handling both rejection and acceptance with grace. There's a lot more to asking someone to be your Valentine than just mustering up the courage to do it. The guide also draws from expert opinions and scientific research to add some gravitas to your romantic endeavor. After all, love might be an art, but there's some science to it as well. So buckle up, put on your best cologne or perfume, and get ready to dive into the complex but incredibly rewarding world of asking someone to be your Valentine. Ready to charm your way into someone's heart? Let's get started! If you've landed here, you're already contemplating the special query of how to ask someone to be your Valentine. Let this be your go-to handbook for sealing the deal in a memorable and meaningful way. Why Being Someone's Valentine Matters In the grand scheme of life, being someone's Valentine might seem like a minor milestone. However, the act carries substantial emotional weight and can be a stepping stone toward deeper intimacy. According to relationship expert Dr. John Gottman, small acts of emotional connection build stronger bonds and pave the way for a lasting relationship. Asking someone to be your Valentine is a way of elevating your relationship status, even if it's just for a day. It shows that you have a special place for that person in your heart and that you're willing to put yourself out there. It's an invitation to share a unique and romantic experience, even if it's a simple one. For the one being asked, it's a validating experience. It acknowledges that you find them special and want to celebrate love or affection, even if you're not in a committed relationship. This can go a long way in boosting self-esteem and overall happiness. There are also some intriguing psychological benefits to being someone's Valentine. Studies show that people who share loving experiences, even minor ones like giving or receiving a Valentine, report higher levels of happiness and emotional well-being. However, it's crucial to approach the subject delicately, keeping in mind that your feelings may not be reciprocated. While this is a chance for you to express your feelings, it's also an opportunity for personal growth, as you navigate vulnerability and deal with the outcome, whatever it may be. So, asking someone to be your Valentine isn't just about the day itself; it's about what the act represents and the potential future it could usher in. Understanding Timing When contemplating how to ask someone to be your Valentine, timing is of the essence. Not just the time of the day, but also where you both stand emotionally and how long you've known each other. Relationship expert Dr. Helen Fisher emphasizes that timing can significantly impact the likelihood of a positive response. Asking too early could catch the other person off guard, and they may not have considered you in a romantic context yet. On the other hand, waiting until the last minute can create unnecessary tension and even come across as insincere or rushed. Valentine's Day itself could be bustling with activities, commitments, and emotional overload. Therefore, it might be wise to broach the subject a few days in advance. This not only gives the other person time to think but also allows both of you to plan something special if the answer is yes. Take note of other life events or stressors that the person may be dealing with at the moment. If they're going through a rough patch, your request could add an extra layer of complexity that they're not prepared to handle. Don't underestimate the power of mood and setting. A serene environment can serve as the perfect backdrop for your question, making the moment feel as special as your feelings. Timing your request well shows thoughtfulness and sensitivity, increasing the odds of a favorable outcome. Reading the Room: Is Your Crush Ready? Before you make your move, it's essential to 'read the room,' so to speak. Are there signs that your interest is reciprocated? Has your crush been giving you more attention than usual? Is the atmosphere between you two already charged with a certain emotional intimacy, or is it strictly platonic? According to social psychology, people are more likely to be attracted to those who show initial interest in them. However, gauging interest can be a tricky endeavor fraught with potential for misinterpretation. One practical approach is to pay attention to non-verbal cues. Body language can reveal a lot about someone's feelings. Are they making eye contact, facing towards you, or mirroring your movements? These can be subtle signs of interest. Another way to assess readiness is through the level and type of conversations you've had. If your chats have ventured beyond the weather and into personal territory, that could indicate a readiness for a deeper connection. Keep in mind that reading signs is not an exact science. You may pick up on cues that seem promising but don't necessarily guarantee that the other person is ready to be your Valentine. That's okay. The act of asking still serves as a clarifier, helping both parties understand where they stand. If you're unsure, you might want to discuss your feelings with a trusted friend. Sometimes, an outsider's perspective can provide invaluable insights into the dynamics between you and your crush. The Classic Approach: A Handwritten Note There's something undeniably romantic about a handwritten note, especially in our digital age. It's a tangible expression of your emotions and a keepsake that your crush can treasure. Unlike digital messages, handwritten notes carry an air of sincerity and effort that could make your request stand out. When considering how to ask someone to be your Valentine through a handwritten note, focus on the quality of your message. A heartfelt, straightforward appeal often works best. Keep it brief but meaningful. As for the presentation, you don't need to be an artist or a calligrapher to make an impact. What's important is that the note looks like you put thought into it. Simple embellishments like a hand-drawn border or a wax seal can add a touch of elegance. Delivery matters too. Whether you leave it somewhere for them to find or give it personally, make sure it's a moment when they can absorb the message privately. The last thing you want is for them to feel pressured by a public display. According to a 2017 study published in the Journal of Nonverbal Behavior, personalized romantic gestures have a higher chance of being well-received. This means that tailoring your note to include specific details that are meaningful to your relationship can make your proposal more impactful. Handwritten notes may seem old-fashioned, but their timeless appeal can turn a simple question into a memorable moment. It's a classic approach for a reason—it works. The Modern Take: Digital Messages In our digital age, it's not surprising that many people opt for electronic methods when contemplating how to ask someone to be your Valentine. Text messages, social media DMs, or even emails can be less intimidating platforms for posing the question. However, digital messages come with their own set of challenges and advantages. One advantage is the convenience and speed at which you can send your message. You don't have to wait for the perfect moment; you can fire off a message whenever the mood strikes. That said, the ease of sending a digital message can also be its downfall. Without the tangible effort that goes into writing a note or asking in person, a text message might come off as less sincere or meaningful. Emojis can add nuance to your words and help convey emotion. A well-placed heart or smiley face can soften your message and make it more endearing. But be cautious—too many emojis can dilute the gravity of your message and make it seem childish. If you're concerned about tone, consider sending a voice note. The inflection and nuances of your voice can add a personal touch that's missing in a plain text message. Digital messages also allow for multimedia enhancements. A cute GIF or meaningful image can supplement your words and create a more engaging experience. So, if you're leaning towards a digital approach, make sure to invest as much thought into your message as you would with a handwritten note to ensure it has the desired impact. In-Person Conversation: Pros and Cons If you're old-school or believe that serious matters should be discussed face-to-face, then you may opt for an in-person conversation when considering how to ask someone to be your Valentine. This approach has both its merits and drawbacks. On the plus side, talking face-to-face allows for immediate feedback. You can gauge their reaction in real-time, adapt your approach based on their body language, and maybe even share a meaningful moment right then and there. However, the downside is that it's inherently riskier. There's nowhere to hide if you stumble over your words or if the other person's response is less than enthusiastic. It requires a level of courage that some may find daunting. Also, remember that your would-be Valentine might feel pressured to give an immediate answer, which could be awkward for both parties. This makes choosing the right setting crucial; aim for a place that's comfortable and private to make the conversation as natural as possible. According to psychologist Dr. Albert Mehrabian's 7-38-55 rule of personal communication, 55% of communication is body language, 38% is the tone of voice, and only 7% is the actual words spoken. When you ask someone in person, you have the chance to utilize all these elements to your advantage. If you decide to go this route, rehearse what you're going to say but leave room for spontaneity. Authenticity tends to resonate more than a well-rehearsed script. While in-person conversations offer the most holistic form of communication, they also come with a unique set of challenges that require careful consideration and bravery. Dealing with Rejection No guide on how to ask someone to be your Valentine would be complete without addressing the elephant in the room—rejection. While it's a possibility we'd all like to avoid, preparing for it can make the experience less daunting. First off, understand that rejection is not a reflection of your worth. There could be a myriad of reasons why the other person said no, many of which might have nothing to do with you. Maybe they're not ready for a relationship, or perhaps they have other commitments. Try not to take it personally. As much as you've built up the courage to ask, they too have the right to say no without judgment. Respond gracefully, without pushing for explanations or trying to change their mind. An elegant exit can leave the door open for future possibilities. Dr. Guy Winch, a psychologist and author specializing in emotional health, suggests that one effective way to deal with rejection is to treat it as a temporary emotional state rather than a permanent condition. This outlook can help you bounce back more quickly and keep things in perspective. Another point to consider is the aftermath. You might still have to interact with this person regularly. Maintaining a friendly demeanor can make the situation less awkward for both parties. Who knows, your mature handling of the situation could even make them reconsider! Lastly, don't let the fear of rejection deter you from taking chances in the future. Remember, you miss 100% of the shots you don't take. Rejection, while painful, also provides invaluable life lessons and character-building opportunities. Handling Acceptance Gracefully So you've successfully navigated the tricky waters of how to ask someone to be your Valentine, and they've said yes. Congratulations! While you might be tempted to shout from the rooftops, it's crucial to handle the acceptance gracefully. First and foremost, thank them sincerely for their positive response. A simple "Thank you for making me the happiest person right now" can go a long way in making the other person feel valued and respected. Now's also the time to discuss what being "Valentines" means for both of you. Does it imply a committed relationship, or is it an opportunity to get to know each other better? Clear communication at this stage can set the tone for your future interactions. If you'd planned something special for Valentine's Day, share those plans to build excitement. But also be open to their ideas. Remember, this is a partnership, and their input is just as vital as yours. Resist the urge to immediately tell all your friends or post about it on social media. Take some time to revel in the private joy of your newfound status. Once you both are comfortable, you can decide together how to share the news with others. Keep the energy alive by continuing to invest in the relationship. The acceptance is just the beginning, and maintaining a meaningful connection requires ongoing effort from both parties. Consider this a wonderful start to a new chapter in your life! Incorporating Love Languages Dr. Gary Chapman's concept of the "Five Love Languages" provides valuable insights into how different people express and receive love. When figuring out how to ask someone to be your Valentine, understanding their love language can make your approach more personalized and impactful. If their love language is "Words of Affirmation," a heartfelt note or meaningful conversation will likely resonate with them. For those who value "Acts of Service," maybe setting up a thoughtful date or helping them with something they've been struggling with can speak volumes. For people whose love language is "Receiving Gifts," the traditional Valentine's Day gifts like chocolates, flowers, or a small personalized memento can make a big impact. If "Quality Time" is their primary love language, planning an intimate date where you can spend time together could be the way to go. If "Physical Touch" is their preferred love language, a warm, sincere hug when you ask them could make all the difference. Of course, be respectful of personal boundaries and make sure that such a gesture is appropriate for your level of intimacy. Applying the concept of love languages does not mean you have to limit yourself to just one. A combination can often be more powerful and reflect the multifaceted nature of human relationships. By tailoring your approach to align with their love language, you not only show that you're attentive and caring but also increase the chances of your question being met with a resounding 'yes.' Crafting the Perfect Message Your message is the cornerstone of your proposition, so it's worth investing time to get it right. Here are some pointers on crafting the perfect message when pondering how to ask someone to be your Valentine. First, aim for clarity. Your message should be straightforward and leave no room for misinterpretation. This is not the time for vague statements or complicated metaphors. State your intentions clearly to avoid any confusion. Embrace vulnerability. Authenticity tends to strike a chord with most people. It's okay to admit that you're nervous or that this is a big deal for you. Such admissions can make your message more relatable and endearing. Be yourself. Don't try to imitate someone else's style or use flowery language that doesn't resonate with who you are. The best messages are the ones that reflect your true self, quirks and all. Spell-check and proofread your message, especially if you're sending it digitally or writing it by hand. Grammatical errors and typos can distract from the sincerity of your words. Finally, close with an open-ended statement that invites a response but doesn't pressure the other person into making a decision. Something like, "I'd love to celebrate Valentine's Day with you, if you're interested" offers them the space to think and respond without feeling cornered. Remember, the perfect message is one that genuinely reflects your feelings and respects the other person's freedom to choose. With a little thought and preparation, you can craft a message that stands the test of time. Common Mistakes to Avoid Even with the best intentions, mistakes can happen. Here are some common pitfalls to avoid when figuring out how to ask someone to be your Valentine. Firstly, avoid overcomplicating things. While grand gestures can be charming, they also run the risk of overshadowing the real message. Keep it simple and heartfelt, as authenticity often speaks louder than spectacle. Another common mistake is not considering the other person's comfort level and boundaries. If you barely know them, a public proposal might make them uncomfortable. Always consider how your actions might be received from their perspective. Don't make it a last-minute effort. Asking someone to be your Valentine is special and deserves proper planning. Rushing through the process or throwing something together at the last minute can send the message that they were an afterthought. According to a study conducted by the American Psychological Association, stress can significantly impact your decision-making skills. In a stressful situation, you're more likely to make snap judgments. So try to manage your anxiety levels when planning and executing your request. Avoid putting all your emotional eggs in this one basket. While it's natural to be invested in their answer, try to maintain a balanced perspective. An acceptance or rejection doesn't define your worth or predict your future romantic endeavors. Lastly, don't forget to listen. If they have reservations or questions, be open to hearing them out. Communication is a two-way street, and your ability to listen can make you a more appealing Valentine. Conclusion Asking someone to be your Valentine is more than a mere ritual; it's a heartfelt expression of your interest and affection. While the idea can seem daunting, a thoughtful approach can make the experience enriching for both you and your potential Valentine. Whether you opt for a classic handwritten note, a modern digital message, or a straightforward face-to-face conversation, the key lies in personalizing your approach to suit both your comfort levels. Pay attention to timing, be aware of the other person's feelings, and prepare for all possible outcomes. Remember that this is just one day, one question, and one person. Whatever the outcome, it's a step in your larger journey of love and self-discovery. Don't let the fear of rejection stop you from opening your heart and taking risks. And if things don't go as planned, take it in stride. Rejection is a part of life that offers its own set of invaluable lessons. On the other hand, if your request is met with a joyful 'yes,' celebrate it as the beginning of a new, exciting chapter. Incorporate these tips and avoid common pitfalls, and you'll be well on your way to crafting an unforgettable Valentine's Day proposal. Here's to hoping that Cupid's arrow finds its mark! Thank you for reading, and best of luck in your quest for love. Recommended Resources 1. "The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love that Lasts" by Dr. Gary Chapman - An insightful guide into understanding how different people express and receive love. 2. "Emotional First Aid: Healing Rejection, Guilt, Failure, and Other Everyday Hurts" by Dr. Guy Winch - A useful resource for dealing with emotional setbacks, including rejection. 3. "Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion" by Robert B. Cialdini - Though not a dating book, this offers valuable insights into human behavior, which can be useful when trying to make a meaningful connection.
  3. The Art of Asking "Will You Be My Valentines?" The phrase "Will You Be My Valentines?" is more than a simple question. It encapsulates the emotions, desires, and vulnerabilities of a person seeking connection and validation. Understanding the complexities behind these four seemingly simple words can elevate a mere question into a profound expression of love and interest. Valentine's Day, celebrated on February 14th, has become a global symbol of love and romance. Couples exchange gifts, cards, and loving words, while singles navigate the intricacies of attraction and desire. The tradition of asking someone to be your Valentine can be traced back to the medieval period, where knights would present roses to women they admired. While the customs have evolved, the underlying themes of love, attraction, and connection remain intact. This article aims to explore the subtleties and nuances of asking "Will You Be My Valentines?" by focusing on five common mistakes and their corresponding remedies. Supported by expert opinions, scientific research, and statistical data, the insights provided herein will equip you with the knowledge and confidence to approach this critical question with grace, authenticity, and sincerity. In a 2018 study conducted by the Pew Research Center, 54% of adults expressed dissatisfaction with their Valentine's Day experiences. These statistics highlight the need for understanding and proper execution in approaching this delicate subject. As Dr. Samantha Meyers, a renowned relationship psychologist, points out: “Asking someone to be your Valentine is not just about expressing romantic interest; it's an opportunity to communicate your feelings, your intentions, and your understanding of the other person. It's a bridge to deeper connection, if navigated with care.” With that in mind, let us delve into the intricacies of asking "Will You Be My Valentines?" and discover how to turn this question into a heartwarming connection rather than a mere cliché. Mistake #1: Lack of Preparation (The First Step to Connection) One of the most significant errors made when posing the question "Will You Be My Valentines?" is a lack of preparation. It's not merely about asking but about understanding the person you're asking, their needs, desires, and the context of your relationship. Consider the following: Are you asking a long-term partner, a new date, or perhaps a friend you want to take to a romantic level? Understanding the nature of your relationship sets the stage for a meaningful interaction. Failure to prepare is often the root of many misunderstandings and disappointments. Dr. Karen Lloyd, an expert in relationship dynamics, emphasizes, “Preparation is not about rehearsing lines but about understanding the other person's perspective, their feelings, and their expectations. It's about being present, empathetic, and sincere.” Scientific research also supports this claim. A 2016 study in the Journal of Social Psychology found that partners who understood each other's love languages felt more satisfied and connected in their relationships. Therefore, consider the following steps to prepare effectively: Know Your Audience: Understand the nature of your relationship and the expectations of the person you are asking. Choose the Right Moment: Timing can be everything. Choose a moment that feels natural, comfortable, and conducive to a meaningful conversation. Reflect on Your Intentions: Why are you asking? What do you hope to achieve? Being clear on your intentions helps in conveying them authentically. Be Mindful of the Setting: Consider the environment in which you are asking. A cozy, intimate setting can foster connection, while a public, noisy place might create barriers. The art of asking "Will You Be My Valentines?" begins with preparation. Being thoughtful, understanding, and mindful of the other person's feelings and expectations lays the foundation for a meaningful connection. Avoid the mistake of lack of preparation and you'll set the stage for a sincere and heartfelt expression of love. Mistake #2: Miscommunication (The Barrier to True Connection) Once you have prepared yourself for the task at hand, the next potential pitfall lies in the realm of communication. The way you ask "Will You Be My Valentines?" is as vital as the question itself. Miscommunication can create barriers, confusion, and even resentment, while clear communication fosters understanding, connection, and trust. A 2020 survey by the American Psychological Association revealed that 42% of couples identify communication issues as a significant challenge in their relationship. This statistic emphasizes the importance of effective communication, not only in daily interactions but also in special moments like asking someone to be your Valentine. Expert in interpersonal communication, Dr. Hannah Fischer, explains: “Communication is the vehicle through which we express our emotions, needs, and desires. Being clear, empathetic, and present in our communication can make a world of difference in how our messages are received.” So, how can one avoid the mistake of miscommunication when asking "Will You Be My Valentines?" Consider the following strategies: Choose Your Words Wisely: Speak from the heart and use words that reflect your true feelings. Avoid clichés or overly complex language that might confuse or alienate your partner. Pay Attention to Non-Verbal Cues: Communication goes beyond words. Pay attention to body language, facial expressions, and tone of voice. These non-verbal cues can convey a wealth of information. Listen Actively: Communication is a two-way process. Listen to what the other person is saying, both verbally and non-verbally. Show that you are engaged and that you value their perspective. Clarify if Needed: If you feel that your message might not have been understood, don't hesitate to clarify. Asking for feedback ensures that you are on the same page. Remember, asking "Will You Be My Valentines?" is more than a question; it's an opportunity to deepen your connection and understanding with someone. Effective communication is key to unlocking this potential. Mistake #3: Falling into Clichés (Creating a Genuine Expression) Valentine's Day has become commercialized to a point where it's easy to fall into clichés. Asking "Will You Be My Valentines?" without thought or originality can diminish its significance and turn a beautiful gesture into a mundane routine. A report by the Journal of Consumer Research in 2019 found that people value personalized expressions of love more than generic, commercially driven gestures. This finding reinforces the importance of creating a genuine and unique expression when asking someone to be your Valentine. Dr. Emily Sanders, an expert in human emotions and relationships, asserts: “Clichés often lack authenticity and personal touch. They can be seen as a shortcut, devoid of thoughtfulness and genuine connection. Creating something unique shows effort, consideration, and true connection.” Avoiding clichés doesn't mean you have to reinvent the wheel; it's about personalizing your approach and making it meaningful for both you and the person you're asking. Here are some strategies to help you avoid the cliché trap: Personalize Your Message: Speak from your heart. Use words and expressions that resonate with your relationship and reflect your unique connection. Consider Their Preferences: Think about what the other person values and appreciates. Tailor your approach to match their tastes and interests. Be Creative: Think outside the boWhether it's writing a poem, creating a small handmade gift, or organizing a special date, creativity can add a touch of originality. Avoid Over-commercialization: While gifts can be lovely, they should not replace the emotional connection and sincerity of your expression. A simple yet heartfelt gesture can be more impactful than an expensive present. The words "Will You Be My Valentines?" should be a manifestation of your unique relationship, not a clichéd slogan. By personalizing your approach and infusing it with creativity and sincerity, you create an opportunity for a deeper, more authentic connection. Mistake #4: Ignoring the Response (Understanding and Respecting Their Feelings) While much attention is often given to the act of asking "Will You Be My Valentines?", an equally crucial aspect is how one handles the response. Whether the answer is a resounding "yes," a hesitant "maybe," or a clear "no," understanding and respecting the other person's feelings is paramount. Ignoring or mishandling the response can lead to confusion, disappointment, or even resentment. According to a study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology in 2017, emotional validation and understanding are key to relationship satisfaction. Dr. Leonard Jacobs, a leading expert in emotional intelligence, emphasizes the importance of response handling: “How we react to the responses of others speaks volumes about our emotional maturity and empathy. In matters of love and attraction, recognizing and validating the other person's feelings fosters trust, connection, and mutual respect.” Here are some strategies to ensure you handle the response to "Will You Be My Valentines?" with care and empathy: Listen Carefully: Pay close attention to not only what is said but how it's said. Tone, expression, and body language can provide valuable insights into their true feelings. Express Understanding: Whether you agree with their response or not, showing that you understand their feelings reinforces trust and respect. Ask for Clarification if Needed: If the response is unclear or you need more information, don't hesitate to ask. Open dialogue fosters understanding. Respect Their Decision: Whether it's a yes or a no, respecting their choice is essential. Pressuring or manipulating them into a different response undermines trust and authenticity. Asking "Will You Be My Valentines?" is not just about expressing your desire but also about creating a dialogue and understanding. Handling their response with empathy, respect, and maturity lays the groundwork for a more meaningful and fulfilling connection. Mistake #5: Neglecting the Follow-Through (Creating a Lasting Connection) Once the question "Will You Be My Valentines?" has been asked and the response has been given, it's essential not to overlook the importance of follow-through. This means honoring commitments, setting expectations, and nurturing the relationship beyond the moment of asking. According to a 2020 report by the National Marriage Project, couples who actively invest in nurturing and growing their relationship are more likely to experience long-term satisfaction and stability. Relationship therapist Dr. Nora Mitchell emphasizes the importance of follow-through: “Asking someone to be your Valentine is not an endpoint; it's a beginning or a continuation. The way you honor that commitment, the effort you put into nurturing the relationship, speaks louder than any words can.” The following strategies can help in crafting a meaningful follow-through: Keep Your Promises: If you've made commitments or promises while asking, ensure you keep them. Trust is built on consistency and reliability. Continue the Conversation: Don't let the dialogue end with the question. Continue to communicate openly, sharing feelings, expectations, and desires. Invest in Quality Time: Spend quality time together. Whether it's a romantic date or simply enjoying each other's company, time invested in each other fosters connection. Reflect on the Experience: Take time to reflect on what went well and what could be improved. Self-awareness and learning from experiences are crucial for growth. Asking "Will You Be My Valentines?" is more than a momentary event; it's part of a larger process in relationship building. By being mindful of the follow-through, you not only honor the moment but also lay the foundation for a lasting and meaningful connection. Understanding the Psychology of "Will You Be My Valentines?" The question "Will You Be My Valentines?" is more than a simple inquiry; it's a psychologically complex interaction. Understanding the underlying psychological dynamics can enhance the experience for both parties and lead to a more meaningful connection. One aspect to consider is the vulnerability associated with asking someone to be your Valentine. It requires courage to express feelings and desires, especially if there's uncertainty about the other person's feelings. This vulnerability can lead to a deeper connection if handled with empathy and understanding. Another psychological facet is the influence of societal norms and expectations. The pressures associated with Valentine's Day can sometimes overshadow the genuine feelings and desires of the individuals involved. Recognizing and navigating these influences is crucial for a sincere and authentic experience. Lastly, the psychological concept of reciprocity plays a role. If someone agrees to be your Valentine, there may be an unspoken expectation of mutual feelings or actions. Being clear about expectations and desires can prevent misunderstandings and foster a more open and honest connection. Delving into the psychology of asking "Will You Be My Valentines?" adds depth and nuance to the experience. It turns a seemingly simple question into an exploration of human emotion, connection, society, and self-awareness. Exploring these psychological aspects enhances self-awareness and emotional intelligence, leading to more profound connections and more fulfilling relationships. The Cultural Impact of "Will You Be My Valentines?" Valentine's Day and the associated traditions, including asking "Will You Be My Valentines?", have a significant cultural impact. It's a phenomenon that transcends individual relationships and resonates with societal norms, beliefs, and practices. In Western cultures, Valentine's Day has become a hallmark of romantic love, celebrated with gifts, dinners, and expressions of affection. It's a day that encapsulates societal values and expectations around romance and relationships. However, the way Valentine's Day is celebrated varies globally. Different cultures have unique traditions and meanings associated with this day, reflecting diverse cultural values and practices. Understanding these differences enriches the experience and allows for a more inclusive and respectful approach. The commercialization of Valentine's Day has also impacted the way people perceive and engage with the concept of love and romance. While it has elevated the celebration in many ways, it has also led to criticisms about superficiality and materialism. Asking "Will You Be My Valentines?" is not just a personal gesture; it's an act that echoes within the larger cultural context. Recognizing and engaging with these cultural dynamics adds depth to the experience and allows for a more thoughtful and considered approach. The cultural impact of "Will You Be My Valentines?" reminds us that love and relationships are not just personal experiences but are intertwined with the broader fabric of society. The Evolution of "Will You Be My Valentines?" in the Digital Age The digital age has transformed many aspects of our lives, including how we ask "Will You Be My Valentines?" From text messages and emails to social media posts and virtual celebrations, the digital world has added new dimensions to this timeless question. While digital platforms offer convenience and novel ways to express affection, they also present challenges. The nuances of face-to-face communication, such as tone and body language, can be lost, leading to misunderstandings or lack of emotional connection. However, the digital space also provides opportunities for creativity and personalization. From customized digital cards to virtual dates, the possibilities are vast and ever-evolving. Embracing the digital realm with mindfulness and intentionality can lead to beautiful and memorable experiences. Moreover, the digital age has expanded the reach of "Will You Be My Valentines?" beyond geographical limitations. Long-distance relationships can now celebrate and engage in ways that were previously impossible or challenging. As with any technological advancement, the key lies in balance and mindfulness. While digital platforms offer new avenues, they should complement, not replace, the human touch, emotional connection, and authenticity that lie at the heart of asking "Will You Be My Valentines?" The digital age has redefined "Will You Be My Valentines?" in both exciting and challenging ways. Embracing the digital world with awareness and creativity ensures that the essence of this timeless question remains intact. The Impact of "Will You Be My Valentines?" on Individual Growth At a glance, the question "Will You Be My Valentines?" may appear solely focused on relationships and romantic connection, but it also has a significant impact on individual growth and self-awareness. This inquiry goes beyond mere sentiment; it's an opportunity for personal exploration and transformation. First, the courage required to ask someone to be your Valentine often requires facing fears and insecurities. Whether it's fear of rejection or anxiety about expressing emotions, overcoming these challenges fosters resilience, confidence, and personal growth. Secondly, the process of asking encourages introspection and self-reflection. Understanding why you want to ask, what it means to you, and what you hope to achieve requires an in-depth exploration of your feelings, values, and desires. This introspection cultivates emotional intelligence and self-understanding. Furthermore, the interactions that follow, such as communication, empathy, and handling responses, develop social skills and interpersonal intelligence. These skills are valuable not only in romantic relationships but in various areas of life. Finally, asking "Will You Be My Valentines?" often leads to learning experiences, whether it's through success, rejection, or unexpected outcomes. These experiences provide lessons that contribute to personal development and wisdom. The journey of asking someone to be your Valentine is not just about romance; it's a path towards self-discovery, growth, and empowerment. It reminds us that love and relationships are not isolated aspects of life; they're intertwined with our personal evolution and self-awareness. Navigating Rejection: What If the Answer Is "No"? Rejection is a possibility when asking "Will You Be My Valentines?" and it's essential to address this potential outcome. While rejection can be painful and disappointing, it also offers opportunities for growth, resilience, and understanding. First and foremost, it's vital to recognize that rejection is a common human experience. It doesn't define your worth or your ability to love and be loved. It's a specific response to a specific situation, not a judgment of your entire being. Secondly, how you handle rejection speaks volumes about your character and emotional maturity. Responding with grace, empathy, and self-reflection can turn a painful experience into a learning opportunity. Dr. Fiona Caldwell, a psychologist specializing in rejection and resilience, states, “Rejection is not just an end; it can be a beginning. It's a chance to reassess, learn, and grow. It's not about failure; it's about finding the right fit, understanding yourself better, and moving forward with wisdom.” Here are some strategies for navigating rejection with dignity and growth: Accept Your Feelings: It's natural to feel disappointed, sad, or even angry. Acknowledge these feelings without judgment and give yourself time to heal. Seek Support: Friends, family, or professional support can provide comfort, perspective, and encouragement. Reflect and Learn: Analyze what happened without self-blame. What can you learn from the experience? What can you do differently next time? Rejection, while painful, is not the end of the world. It's a chance to grow, reassess, and move forward with greater understanding and resilience. Embracing rejection with grace and wisdom enriches your personal growth and prepares you for future opportunities in love and life. The Legacy of "Will You Be My Valentines?": A Historical Perspective The tradition of asking "Will You Be My Valentines?" has deep historical roots. Understanding its legacy enriches the contemporary experience and provides context to this enduring expression of love. The origins of Valentine's Day can be traced back to ancient Rome, where the festival of Lupercalia celebrated fertility and love. With the advent of Christianity, St. Valentine became associated with love and romance, and the tradition evolved over centuries. In the Middle Ages, the practice of sending love notes and expressions of affection during Valentine's Day became popular in Europe. This tradition laid the groundwork for the modern concept of asking someone to be your Valentine. Throughout history, literature, art, and popular culture have embraced and shaped the tradition of asking "Will You Be My Valentines?" This cultural and historical legacy adds depth and resonance to the experience, connecting us to a rich tapestry of human emotion and expression. Recognizing the historical legacy of "Will You Be My Valentines?" connects us to our past, enriches our present experience, and reminds us that love, affection, and human connection are timeless and universal. Whether it's expressed through handwritten notes, digital messages, or face-to-face conversations, the legacy of asking "Will You Be My Valentines?" endures. It's a testament to the power of love, connection, and our shared human experience. Conclusion: Mastering the Art of "Will You Be My Valentines?" The question "Will You Be My Valentines?" might seem simple on the surface, but as we've explored, it carries within it a world of complexity, opportunity, and potential pitfalls. From preparing oneself to handling the response and follow-through, each step presents unique challenges and opportunities for personal growth and connection. Asking someone to be your Valentine isn't just about the words spoken; it's about creating a sincere, authentic, and meaningful expression of affection and desire. It's about understanding the needs and feelings of the other person, communicating effectively, and building a lasting connection. It's an art that requires mindfulness, empathy, creativity, and commitment. The five common mistakes we've discussed—lack of preparation, miscommunication, falling into clichés, ignoring the response, and neglecting the follow-through—are not just pitfalls to avoid but lessons to be learned. Each offers insights into the human condition, relationships, love, and personal growth. Remember, the journey to asking "Will You Be My Valentines?" is a reflection of who you are and what you aspire to be in your relationships. It's a chance to grow, connect, and celebrate love in all its beauty and complexity. Embrace the process, learn from the mistakes, and create a moment that resonates with authenticity and depth. So, will you take the plunge and master the art of asking "Will You Be My Valentines?" It's a question that awaits your courage, your creativity, and your heart. Resources For those interested in delving deeper into the subject, the following resources provide further insight and guidance: The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman: A guide to understanding and expressing love in ways that resonate with different individuals. Essential reading for anyone looking to enhance their relationships. Why Marriages Succeed or Fail by John Gottman: Based on extensive research, this book explores the dynamics of successful relationships and offers practical advice for couples at various stages. Emotional Intelligence by Daniel Goleman: A foundational text on understanding and managing emotions, both within oneself and in interactions with others. Highly recommended for personal growth and improving communication skills.
  4. So this is an msn conversation, i edited out the names...its all one person talking, i split it up so ur eyes wouldnt bleed from the absense of paragraphs lol! enjoy! I dont think of valentines day as any more of any other day its an excuse... to force couples to show their feelings when really they should be all the time it forces a guy to make time for his gf when really he should anyways... it pulls a girl away from shopping with her girls, and a guy from spending time watchign the game with his friends to make them spend time together when really it should be anyways... it makes him do something for her, and her do sometihng for him... makes him think about her more, and her think about him more... when really... it shold always be like that Valentines day is just another day... thats all i dont knwo about you... but id rather get a rose unexpectedly on a random day from my princess than expect one on v-day i'd love a random card she made for me 4 weeks before my birthday than a card ON my birthday i'd LOVE for her to sneak up behind me and hug me from behind and hear her tell me she loves me and give me a kiss on the cheek when im just randomly walking down the hall instead of expecting it on our anniversary when somethings expected, its not as good but when that special person turns your regular normal day into a day that you cant stop smiling that really means something because they do it, just because they care about you
  5. I've never kissed a girl before and I wanted to know how I can tell when to make the move or how to go about kissing a girl. I wanted to make a move on my girlfriend on valentine's day and I needed some advice on how I should go about doing it. She's not the naughty girl or anything like that but I think she's waiting for me to make the move and I really want this valentine's day to be special for the both of us. I'm not going for a long kiss just something to show that I care and I have feelings for her. - Josh07
  6. I sent her a valentines day card, it was pretty funny I must say ( as I am humorous and awesome) . She sent me back the following. hey long time no see hey! thanks for the valentines card, just checked my emeails then, i ve been away at kangaroo island all last week. only one i got apart from a chain text, it made me feel special heheheheh. what are u up to this yr? ive got a house - back to finish my 3rd yr of uni hopefully other than that not much happening just got back from 2 months in - BIIIGGG holiday! was awesome. better go now its LUNCH TIME and i am starving!!! keep in touch. i deleted a bunch of things like locations and names. Should i invite her for cofee ??? CONSIDERING - I have asked her out before.
  7. So, i've had my eye on this girl who has been coming in lately to the Starbucks I go to each morning. I decided last week to take a chance and smile at her. She smiled back and we had a brief conversation. A couple of days ago, I saw her again at Starbucks. She was on her way out as I was on my way in. She said "You're late!" and smiled. As I passed by, I said something like "Oh, so you get here at 8:30, huh? I'll have to remember that." and I smiled back at her. But, I kept walking inside. Then today, I decided to sit after I got my daily drink at the Starbucks and do a little bit of light reading. She came in again. When she got her drink I went over, said hi and told her Happy Valentine's Day. I introduced myself and shook her hand. I asked her if she had any big plans for tonight. She said she was traveling out of town for business and to visit family. She didn't mention a boyfriend and obviously had no ring on her hand. We talked briefly about what she did for a living. She asked me how far my work was from Starbucks. I said something else funny, she laughed. We were walking to our cars through pretty much the entire conversation. By the time we got to our cars we said our Happy Valentines Day again and see ya later. What do you guys think about this encounter? To be honest, I had hoped to have more time or a little more confidence in myself to ask her for her phone number or out for a date. It just seemed the conversation was too quick and I dont know if it was because I was heading out to my car while we were talking or it was because she was or both. Impressions? What to do next? I'm just starting to put myself out there again and try to meet women i am interested in. I think i used to be so good at it. Orlander
  8. Well Valentine's Day is tomorrow and like everyone I know, I too want to make it a memorable one. I have been single for a solid 6 months and I feel like I am ready for another committment. There is this girl in one of my classes at school. I am not exactly close friends with her, but we both ran track last year and I really like her. I have a plan of asking her and everything, but I need advice on something else. Anyway, I woke up on this sunny Sunday morning and felt entergized and overflowed with inspiration. I spent two hours listening to music, jumping around my house, and writing poems. I just finished a poem about the girl I like that I think effectively conveys my emotions while also containing a romantic tone to get her attention, seeing as how she does not know that much about me. My first question is, "What words should I put in the parenthesis at the end of my poem, which will also serve as the title of the poem. This is the poem: Utterly astounded by your presense, Unconsciously surrendering as you seduce my senses, Staring into your beautiful eyes that are ceaselessly sparkling, I am shown heaven's reflection. Filling my mind with incredible aspirations Intertwined within a bundle of desires and wishes, Hopelessly blinded by the powerful white light Emanating from your angelic smiles. Lost in the surreal image of your glowing hair As it softly rests upon your forehead, Your endless blonde streaks flow Like the river of emotion that flows around my heart. All my prior thoughts and actions Leading me along this unknown path to you, Mesmerized by your movement, Captivated by the lovely song of your voice. Searching for an answer among the peaceful winds of chance, Unsure of your true nature that I attempt to uncover Yet undoubtedly certain of the decision I have made To pursue my longing for such an invaluable treasure. Memories of you eternally imprinted Within the confines of my imagination, Beneath the covers of my bed on a most magical night I hear the whispering words, " " That being said, I also would like to know if giving her this poem right away would overwhelm her. Should I wait to see if we form a meaningful relationship or should I just let her know of my feelings that are hard to express in person? Thanks for reading! Inside Info: We are both 18yr old highschool seniors.
  9. so people who have been keeping up with problems....the new guy in my reading class has a gf! i kinda thought he was flirting with me i guess hes just nice. sucks though that this kinda ruined my valentines day. last year the guy i was "seeing" kinda dumped me on valentines day he basically told me he was leaving to the other side of the world. WHAT SHOULD I DO??!!!?!?!?!.i was realllly starting to like him...geez i dont have any luck when it comes to guys. happy valentines day everyone! people who are good relationships im extremely jealous. im starting to think that maybe i wasnt meant to find anyone...
  10. I'm not sure if this is the right forum for this, but I guess it is most appropriate for this question. I cut off contact with my ex back in October, held strong and didnt talk to her until she contacted me in late November, we had a good talk, then a fight a few days later. Again I went NC, she contacted me on Valentines Day and then I believe 2 other times recently. Now its not like we talk about anything involving us. I just found it a bit strange the timing of her contact. I just want to know what I should do from here. I've been doing alot better, but part of me still cares about her and I dont want to fall back into what I was doing when this all first started. My thought so far was to just allow her to contact me if she feels like it. Thanks for all your help once again.
  11. I just had to brag. It's so beautiful. A heart with lots of tiny diamonds - late Valentines Day present. sigh
  12. This is long and I'm sorry in advance but I'm really hurt. The past couple of days my girlfriend has mentioned marriage incredibly to me. Every single sentence she has stated seems like had marriage in it. We've only been together 4 and a half months. I would change the subject often. I feel like getting married at 4 and a half months is ridiculously early for that type of thing. So she said this to me on a MySpace message: Last night about 8pm (before Valentine's Day, I already got her gifts for VD. Unfortunately I'm stuck in another city for business trip so I couldn't be with her for VD) I sent this back to her because she had been bugging me for a response. Last night she said this: About an hour and a half ago we talked on the phone. It's very awkward. She says "I'm trying to decide if I'm mad at you, I am not sure." I said "you can feel however you choose to, all I can do is be honest." Then seems like an eternity of awkward silence and then she says "well I have to go get ready for the doctor." In her voice she sounded really upset the entire time. Well I now know if she's upset. She says this just now: I'm UNBELIEVABLY hurt by this. I am crying right now as I type. I'm seriously considering ending it right now. You can research my past posts to see where else she's been immature, about moving in with me. I just don't know if I can continue this after that. What should I do?
  13. So, my girlfriend and I broke up last night, and boy did it end horrible...Anyway, I'll start from the beginning. Ashton and I had an excellent relationship in the beginning. She was everything I wanted at first. Low maintenance. Encouraging. And accepting. My kids both liked her alot, infact, my daughter often called her mom as a bit of a joke thing, even though engagement wasn't in the picture. Well, the last 3 months, Ashton seemed to be really upset. I tried talking to her about it, and she shrugged off each attempt coldly. So, I just gave up. I'm not a pursuer when it comes to relationships, if a woman plays hard to get, or shows little interest, I will immediately back off. In this case, I did the same thing. So about a month later, our relationship really died down. We called eachother maybe 4 times a week, and our conversations never lasted long. I figured she needed space, so I gave it to her, and finally last night I had her over for dinner with my ex-wife, her husband, and my children. Well, before dinner, she blasts off on me about how I've been unsupportive of her, how I forgot to get her anything on Valentine's Day (Which is a big joke), and how I've been so unemotional. I told her that she wouldn't talk to me, so I thought she needed space. Told her that she didn't need my support, and I told her that I didn't even recognize Valentine's Day as a holiday. So, then she slapped me in the face. And I smacked her back. I'm not one to leave a threat unanswered. Male or female, if anyone strikes me with the intent of hurting me, I will attack them. So, then she started crying, and started cursing at me. I picked up the phone and threatened to call the police, and she ran out of my house crying. I broke up with her in an e-mail this morning. Now, I'm having trouble with the authorities, who came over to my home to question me tonight. I told them exactly what happened, and the officers, who seemed apalled by my vocations and beliefs said that they would return soon. I don't believe I did anything wrong. She struck me first, and I struck back. That is self-denense isn't it? Why are the authorities angry with me? Thanks, Kane.
  14. If you got a Valentines ecard from a guy you have been chating to for over four months, would it freak you out? Even thou you get along great and have organised a visit from him for a weekend in the future. I think I've scared a nice girl off. Haven't heared from her since before Valentines day and I usually get an email every two days.
  15. This doesn't make sense. Things seemed to be going fairly well between my boyfriend and I. We were together for just over a year. Then on Friday he said that we should just be friends. I don't know what to do, all I want is him back. I've had my heart broken before a few times, but its NEVER hurt like this. I can't listen to music. I've only eaten two graham crackers in 50hrs (i have no hunger no will to eat and the thought of food makes me nauseaus), I've lost interest in photography (a beloved hobby), I'm losing my will to live. The decision doesn't feel right. I'm so confused. I don't feel like he's given me the whole picture as to WHY he thinks things are better this way. I don't know if he's just trying to trick himself. Even the day before we were talking about Sweden and hypotheically if he'd stay there; he said of course he'd bring me along. Then things suddenly change the next day?! How can things even change so much since Valentines day when he gave me a lovely card and wrote Lots of Love xoxoxoxoxo ? I don't know what to do. All I want to do is have him back. I've barely been able to pause from crying since it happened. And when I cry its the kind of crying that's like I've lost a huge part of my soul and I have a hard time standing because my whole being is hurting SO much. What do I do? I want him back, but I don't want to screw things up. Every fiber of my being wants to be with him, and that if this is really the end between us, I need him to help me through it. I feel like I've almost lost the will to live.
  16. Hi happy valentines day I have two questions at the moment... If you sending resume online, would you put your photo and how would you do it?? company asking ms-word format resume, but I don't know how to put photo to them.. or should I attach as separate..?? and also..does it show that you really want that job if you send by air the same thing..? or that just not necessary? I haven't got much clue about applying job online.. hope I could get help.. thank you
  17. On Wednesday (Valentine's Day) I received a card off someone in my office which had a really touching message ('you are a fantastic person. No one can make me laugh like you can' Love Ax). Now for a long time I have liked someone in my office called Anna and I once asked her out, timing it badly because she had a boyfriend who she's now split up with. Since then we have been getting on really well and joking about sending each other Valentine's Cards. Getting carried away in the moment, I sent her one through the internal mail, which according to someone on her team, she never got (or at least never admitted to getting). I can't be sure whether it is from her or not. I really hope it was, but why wouldn't she have admitted getting mine when she MUST have done? I've tried checking the handwriting, but it doesn't seem to match hers, but I've also put the handwriting of other suspects (of which there are few) under the microscope. Do I just let it go or is there any way I should find out if she sent me that card? There's no one who would know either way as I doubt she's have told anyone, but I really would like to know.
  18. Has anyone experienced this? I have been in NC for almost 2 months. I don't initiate contact, but she almost always emails me after big events. Day AFTER my birthday, day AFTER valentines day. And usually, when I respond with any type of questions, she won't write back. She asks me questions, and I always answer them upbeat and friendly...yet the same questions back to her go unanswered. I want to get back together. She dumped me for another guy after a fight. Most people say that she is regrets her decision...I just dont get it. We never had a relationship like this. For 4 years, we had a fantastic time...now, we are almost like strangers.
  19. Well, let's hear it on this clichee thread. Did you meet the love of your life on Valentine's day, or has that day carried any special significance for you in your current relationship - or is it just marketing hype - or really Single Awareness Day (SAD) where you just fell left out when you see all the happy couples out there? Last year, I've had a first date in a very, very, long time right on Valentine's Day. Although it didn't go anywhere it had been a few years since I went out with anyone even on a 'friendship' level - but it was cool to have an ice-breaker. Think the concept is badly clicheed. Anyway, has anything special happened, share your romantic story.
  20. Today, I go over to my girlfriend's house and sneak through the window because her dad dislikes me for some reason. I give her my valentines gift, she gives me chocolate and that should have been it. Her dad comes home as I was leaving out the window and he walks into my girlfriend's room without knocking. I was standing by the window and her dad pop's his head out the window to see why it was open and catches me. I know I have done something wrong but that is not the problem. He yells at us for a couple mins (30 mins) and he gets so angry that he rages towards my girlfriend and slap/kicks her a couple times. Right then her aunt came to pick her up for tutoring and she stopped him. He told her to go to tutoring or else he would kill her which I thought was a problem. Some things that happened took her cell phone ripped of her cell phone accessories and threw it in the bushes broke the plate my girlfriend gave me chocolates in He was most angry how us being together has brought down her grades (or so he says) but we hardly see each other. As I see it, it's a typical asian father who wants to be over protective of her daughter. I told him that I understand I have done something bad and will never come again but I just don't know what to do.... Any comments? Questions? All details are NOT included.
  21. I have previously posted my horrible break up story last week...but a quick recap, my boyfriend of 3 years (he's 41, I'm 28 ) broke up with me on Valentine's Day over the phone during my lunch break. This was the second time, as the first he did it over i.m. last June and I took him back towards the end of July. Now, my roommate is a social worker..so she is all about getting your emotions out. So I wrote this letter basically telling him everything I was disappointed with and with him. It's a good letter as you never get a word in edgewise with him...cause he's always right and a complete and utter narcissist. So there is no way I have had the opportunity to say these things before. So, most of my males friends say NO!! Most of the girls...say yes. So I am at a crossroad... Do I send the letter or not?
  22. hey guys my g/f jsut broke up with me yesterday so my valentines day kinda sucks but my best friend and i are trying to make it the best we can out of wat we have and its not really that good im sitting here crying because of how down i am and i have been crying all night to so yea so if you have any advice on how to get over a longterm relationship please let me know (im a girl so like yea
  23. So I have been seeing this girl for like 2 months. Things have been good up until last week when I didn't see her @ all for Valentines Day cuz of weather and then the next 2 days we were gonna do something but she kept breaking plans. Well anyways I finally get to see her last night and she is being really distant. So I kinda just distanced myself from her instead of courting her. She had a headache and kept complaining so I kinda went and layed on the other couch so I didn't keep bumping into her and stuff while we were laying on the couch together. So I go lay on the other couch, and decided I was going to go lay down in her bed hoping she would follow. Well I wake up at 4am and she is passed out on the couch so I tried to see if she wanted to come lay in be with me but she gave me an attitude so I let her be. This morning I woke up and went and sat on the couch and she was doing housework and stuff and then told me she was going to go shopping so I gathered my things and told her I was going home. Then she loses it telling me that she hasn't seen me all week and that she isnt going to see me much of this week because she has to study for a test on wed and that Im an {Mod Edit} cuz I don't wanna spend time with her. I never even said I didn't want to chill with her. So I try to avoid confrontation and say that I wanted to go home and shower and change cuz I stunk and that she could come down to my house later and we could do something. Then all I get is attitude saying that she don't want to come down to my city(20 minutes away) and that I am selfish and that things are always the way I want them to be. I just laughed at her and gave her a kiss and left. Looks like I am in the dog house now cuz she broke plans with me all week and I didn't want to go to the mall with her today but still invited her over. ridiculous.
  24. sorry, i just started to remember all these days and especially the valentines days i spent with my ex for about five years....i feel so alone, and sad, thinking about him, and those happy moments we had, and he gave away when he fell in love with a new girl. I am 37 weeks pregnant, and just waiting for my baby to arrive, but i still miss him, i love him, and although i know he is not worth it, i am mad at myself for believing everything he told me. everytime he said, i love you, i felt happy, and after my two month of being pregnant, and married, he basically decided to confess that he wasn't in love with me anymore, but have met a another girl who he is completely in love and can't stand the chance of loosing her, so he decided to leave me, and pursue her. it hurted, and it has hurted a lot these seven months, and even though there is no contact, bc he doesn't even call me, he just forgot about me, i still miss him, i still want him back, and sometimes i can't understand how someone can just fall out of love with you after five-year relationship. the thing that i hate the most though, is that i asked the girl nicely to leave him, but instead she insulted me, and it feels bad, and now i can't stand thinking they are together, having a nice time, him buying her all things, and trying to make her the most happiest girl, and tomorrow is valentines, and i am here alone, with big belly, and crying for believing in someone who basically didn't even about care about me... sometimes its hard to move on, when you have a baby that reminds you everytime how you gave up everything, who in just in days, throw you away, and never even looked back at the wonderfull times you shared......
  25. My boyfriend and I were together 3 years. He is 41 and I am 28. We broke up last June (his doing) after 2.5 years together. We got back together 7 weeks later (after he contacted me). We wer doing great, getting along, and I thought things were good. Well I get a call on Valentine's Day saying he wants to break up with me. You heard me right, over the phone (mind you, the first time was over I.M....nice hu?) So not only do I get broken up with on Valentine's Day but over the phone by a grown man. Is the second time around crappier? I think I feel more stupid than anthing else. Anyone else experience a second time brake up? And how did it feel?
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