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If you could have any one super power, what would it be? Mine would be the ability to stop time. Isn't that the one thing I always hear myself saying, thinking, feeling? If only I had more time. Isn't that the wish on everyone's tongue tip? So okay, new found power, say you happen, I know the moral of the day is that I'll end up wasting you on trivial s**t, but sometimes I just need to gather my thoughts and collect myself. Life is fast and it only seems to be getting faster. One day I was 16 and all I could think about was the endless currency of precious time I had to spend. It was so undervalued. I'd do nothing with it. Spend it in bed, spend it online, spend it daydreaming. The only thing that's changed is the first part - hello new early riser - goodbye I've got forever so let's just chill and things will happen next year. Now I wake up 24 having to think if I'm actually well into my twenties or just getting started so I still have the excuse of 'but I'm young!' I'm getting married in two and a bit weeks time, things are changing but I feel the same. I need more time! More time to plan, more time to get myself sorted, more time to figure out what I want and need to do before it's too late, before I say I went to sleep 24, newly wed and woke up 36 and aching with the feeling - I could of done so much more, if only I had more time. If I could use my magic power only once, it would be for the most selfish reason. I would pause time whilst D holds me. Those moments where you wake up on Sunday morning to cool sheets, drizzly weather, grey sky peeking through the blinds and his arm around you. I would want that feeling forever, his chest moving up and down, his mouth open in deep sleep, like my own personal statue of beauty and everything I've ever wanted and more. When I wake up in his arms nothing else matters. Okay, now this daydreamer has to walk herself to the office and put the dreams and the day on hold. Daydream in your own time, the world will not stop for me and time waits for no man. I just want to get through this week of dreary work, I just want to have the courage to not wimp out and run from my problems. I'm starting this diary because I guess I start a lot of things that I feel like, but I really badly want to keep this one up. I don't even think it's made me feel better. More last minute planning tomorrow. I have a day out to a bohemian cocktail bar with my fiancé and best friend at the weekend - we're choosing wedding rings. I can't wait to be his wife, that's all I keep thinking, through all the drudge and ridiculous planning - I can't wait to be his wife. Write you later, Lo x

My question is for anyone. Why does a guy wish to share his wife/girlfriend with someone else.? we are not taking about swinging here but the pleasure of watching him wife with another men. for ever my husband has asked me to have sex with some of his Friends and i always said no way well 6 month ago i said OK and to my surprise it was Very good. I have had several partners and many repeats,i feel super,not slutty at all, i am far more sexual then i ever thought i was, i have sex all the time,i lost 10 lbs lol. i feel great and it shows.My relation with my husband is equally great, our sex life is hotter then ever,we are closer then ever as well,we talk and hell we even listen.. many of our Friends know about our lifestyle and it sure add to the trill,we dint put it in your face but we don't over hide it as well. i am one of those that has to understand the why for everything, so why is our relation so much better now,why i feel so in control and so...alive your thoughts please. Susan

My wife and I were living in Japan for quite awhile. We got married there and had two children. After the extremely lengthy visa process, my wife finally was granted a visa and we've moved to America. While living in Japan, I barely made enough money to survive. The last couple years there I was only able to get by because of the US stimuli and the Japanese stimuli. Without those, we would have been in some hot water. Anyway, we made it to America, and I just got a job. It pays much better than my Japanese job, but I can't really afford much, due to inflation and all that. My parents helped us to move to America, and we are living with them. My wife doesn't have a driver's license here, nor does she have a job. Even if she got all those things, we'd have to put the kids in daycare which, in Japan, was like $300/month total, for both kids. Here, it's around $1,000/month per kid. Crazy. So, she is just staying at home, cooking and cleaning, and taking care of the kids. However, my mother is driving her crazy. She is insulting her cooking, insisting that she is raising the kids incorrectly, and just making nasty comments that hurts my wife's feelings. My wife ends up crying every night. At the same time, she tries to not let it show. So, when I said that I would confront my mother and try to get her to stop, my wife refused the help, telling me that she would be upset if I said anything; she just wants to leave. Even so, I can't afford an apartment yet, with the crazy inflated prices. What should I do to deal with my toxic mother?

Hi all, I am Aryan. I am currently the newest member on the forum. I have created this very unique kind of poem for my wife. I have called it PixoPoem (pictures + poem) Before showing it to her I needed some response. So please check. I don't know why video is not getting embedded. So please paste below code in your address bar after youtube watch?v=F2UVzY8K53Y Do you like the idea? Please comment. Butterflies are running in my stomach. Thank you.

Do you awaken with a smile yet fall asleep in tears? Or is it just indifference towards that which isn't clear? Can you sing redundant lullabies without knowing what they mean? Are your dreams just gifted mysteries showing you all that I've seen? If green is truly yours does blue belong to me? Do you represent the earth while I hold favor with the sea? And when you begin to tremble does it comfort you that I'm near? Does your tectonic disregard for us spawn from truths of which you fear? With time being our sacred father does he have to keep a wife? Didn't I hear them call you mother while you rid yourself of life? If the sun no longer shines for us is everything a blur? You told me it's a new day but how are you so sure? How could you be so bold? You're growing far too old How could you be so bold? You're growing far too old

There is absolutely no point to this at all but if you're bored, then have a read and imagine with me if you will, along the way of this little tale. Oh and by the way, please pay attention, I shall only tell this story once. It isn't Grimm's Fairy Tales around here you know. Now then, imagine yourself every day. You stand by the signpole for the bus stop. You're out there waiting to go to work, waiting for the bus that comes along every morning at 8:05 am. Why 8:05 am? Just because. So, every day, you wait patiently for your bus to come along. And, every day, before the bus, along comes a dog. Now this dog, he's not hurting anything or anyone, just having his morning rounds and a bit of a piss here and there. He's not turning over trash cans, chasing cats, picking fights with other dogs, swiping small children's ice cream cones or menacing people like some low rent hoodlum dog might do. No, he's a nice dog that just trots along and minds his own business bothering no one and he always stops and has a piss on the light pole on the corner at 8:03 am. Why 8:03 am? Just because. Now, imagine with me if you will, one Saturday night some fool of a person manages to crash his car right into the signpole for the bus stop and wreck it. Smashed car, smashed signpole and a fool in the middle of all of it. What a mess. I would not want to be this fool of a person when he has to tell his wife he crashed the car and smashed up a bus stop signpole along with the car. I imagine she would want to smash in his head for crashing their only car. But, that would only cause even more smashing up now wouldn't it? It might even smash up some of her favorite crockery or perhaps a cookpot or pan or two. Let's just dispense with the smashing for now before this becomes too bloody and someone or something really gets hurt here shall we? Now then, where was I? Ah, yes. The poor long suffering wife of this fool who started off all these crashing and smashing problems. She now has to take the bus to work instead of the car. But, there is no more signpole for the bus stop, and not quite knowing where it was supposed to have been, besides inside the front of their only car, and she knows damn good and well it doesn't belong there, she must walk three blocks down to the next bus stop signpole. In the rain. To catch the 6:40 am bus. Why 6:40 am? Just because. Let us also not forget that this fool who crashed his car into a bus stop signpole smashing them both to bits, also has the added expense of having to pay to replace said bus stop signpole. Along with car repair bills, hospital bills, crockery, pan and cookpot replacement costs and making up for lost wages from the time spent out catching buses to go purchase said replacement items, arrange car repairs and having his head examined. But, I digress here, so let's carry on then shall we? Now, imagine with me if you will, that bright and early come Monday morning, along comes the bus stop signpole replacement crew to fix the damage caused by the aforementioned fool. They arrive at 7:12 am. Why 7:12 am? Because they were supposed to be on the job promptly at 7:00 am but they were running behind messing about gathering up things, having a nice little chat to their leisure, enjoying their morning coffee and donuts making everything all sticky around here, and I fully intend to dock their pay for twelve minutes worth of work at the end of this story. Bus stop signpole replacement crews can not be allowed to slack off and just willy willy about all they would like. This is not the road repair crew after all. If they wanted to slack off and report to work whenever they felt like it, they should have joined the road crews instead. Those people do just whatever they want to do, whenever they want to do it, with all of their barrels and traffic cones and diversions and things. Oh dear. Please pardon my little rant and for not staying on topic. There really is no excuse for such poor behavior on my part. I should not take my frustrations about slacker road crews and bus stop signpole replacement crews out on you. I do apologize. Now then moving right along, somewhat anyway, imagine yourself on Monday morning being awakened at 7:12 am by a series of loud booms accompanied by a horrific banging and clanging noise and followed immediately by the most godawful, teeth rattling hammering noise and the many thuds of something heavy being dropped somewhere. Lets also add in the sounds of a half dozen or so coarse and grumpy men jacked up on caffeine and sugar, shouting, cursing and laughing at one another. This doesn't quite make for a very good start to the morning now does it? Eventually, the ear splitting racket and offensive conversation ceases. This is followed by the sound of a diesel truck cranking over and moving off. You look out from under the pillows you've stuffed over your head to dull the noise and see the time is now 7:40 am. Why 7:40 am? Because I thought it would be nice to have a time ending in a zero for once in this story. Also because now I do not have to pay that slacker bus stop signpole replacement crew for a full 30 minutes worth of work for that particular job. It should have taken no more than 15 minutes to begin with, but I strongly suspect at least one of them was guilty of leaning on a shovel the entire time and not doing his bit like some road crew man. We must get you off to work so, imagine with me if you will, you jump up out of bed, race to the bathroom, shower, get dressed, comb your hair, brush your teeth, finding a loose filling caused by this morning's racket that now you'll have to have attended to, and you rush outside by 7:58 am. We'll not have that little thing asking about the times any longer please. I'm quite sick of it by now aren't you? You already know what I'm about to say anyway so lets just say you're quite quick with the morning ****, shower and shave routine and be done with it all right then? No offense to the ladies present. So, you are now happily outside in plenty of time to catch our usual 8:05 am bus but there's quite a shock of a mess in front of you. That slacker bus stop signpole replacement crew has botched the job completely. They haven't replaced the signpole like they were supposed to, they've torn up the sidewalk and strip of grass next to the curb and dug a very large hole in the ground and left a massive pile of dirt right next to it. For what who knows, but if that fool gets his car back from the repair shop before this new mess gets fixed properly, he just might crash the car down into that hole. In which case, I believe his wife would be fully within her rights to simply leave the fool and the smashed up car down there and cover them over with that large dirt pile. After all, who would want a twice smashed up car? Either way, car crashing fool or not, you're not worried about this. It's not your mess and the bus stop signpole replacement crew did do a fairly reasonable job of placing high visibility warning tape and, Ah Ha! I knew it! road crew traffic barrels! around the mess of a botched up job. I shall be having a talk with this particular job foreman regarding these barrels later. Now then, before I start off on a new tangent of traitorous bus stop signpole replacement crews and raise my blood pressure again, we'll just continue along and I'll try to remain focused on the story at hand. Being that you are not worried about this mess of a botched up job, falling into the large hole or tripping over a giant pile of dirt, but you are worried about catching your 8:05 am bus, you walk just past where the bus stop signpole should have been and proceed to wait next to the light pole on the corner. The bus driver knows you well and you are confidant he will stop for you even though there is no more signpole. It is rather nice to be the one with some common sense in this story now isn't it? After all you are not the car crashing fool of a person that will be in quite a state later on this evening. Imagine now please, that while you are waiting patiently as always, from around the corner here comes that nice dog, just trotting along, minding his own business, not bothering anyone, making his morning rounds like he does every day. Again, as in every day before, promptly at 8:03 am the dog reaches the corner and lifts his leg to have his nice little piss on the lightpole and pisses all over your leg instead. You are quite shocked and irate and about this and so you kick at the dog who quickly hurries away grumbling under his breath in dog language about uncouth and rude humans. It seems that is not such a nice dog after all. Some nerve he must have for pissing down your leg! Or perhaps the dog is actually a stupid dog and hasn't the sense to tell a lightpole from a human's leg? In any case, you are now in quite a conundrum as your bus is due along in less than two minutes, you are soaked to the skin and all down inside your shoe with dog piss and you can not go to work that way but have no time to rush back upstairs, wash and change before the bus arrives. So, you give it up as a lost cause, walk back to the front porch, sit down, call your office, inform them you'll be late to work and get fired. It seems your now former boss is the wife of that car crashing fool and she's entirely fed up with men and their feeble excuses about bus stop signpoles, cookpots, smashing, crockery patterns and head trauma. What was that? What kind of a story is this? It's my little made up off the top of my head story that's all it is. I just so happened to wrap you right up in the middle of it and had you not been daydreaming away over there and pretending, or skipping important portions, you wouldn't be in this mess in the first place. What do you mean it's not your fault? This is all your fault entirely! I told you at the very beginning to pay attention and had you been paying attention you wouldn't have been standing next to the light pole the dog pissed on every day at 8:03 am like clockwork while you were waiting for the bus to arrive. So don't go blaming me for all your troubles now. What's that? This is a terrible story? Well it wasn't until you decided to interfere with it but that's quite all right. You are entitled to your own opinion after all but, since that's what you think, very well, then, I shall leave you out of my own little original stories from now on. Good luck with finding a new employer and someone to do your laundry. You shall get no references from me and please do be careful not to fall into that giant hole or over top that large dirt pile on your way out. I will not attend any lawsuits, injury bills or otherwise as the mess is properly marked off and clearly the responsibility of the road crews since those are road crew barrels out there and not the properly designated and assigned bus stop signpole replacement crew markers. Perhaps the road crew man leaning on the shovel will care to hear your complaints. Goodbye

Something we can all relate to at some stage in our lives, hope you enjoy it, my latest. No Shame in Crying To those who plead for another go, And the many who crave for a chance to grow, Tears of despair and hope filling their eyes, How admirable they may be for trying, There sure is no shame in crying. To the man on the street corner pleading for a simple dollar, Yearning for the donation of a passing by scholar, Aimlessly they appear to wander without a single care, Whilst the man's hopes of redemption are slowly dying, He sees no shame in crying. To the girl who simply seeks to eradicate adversity, a star in the making, Slowly her hopes and dreams are awakening, The whole world her stage, she's relinquished her lifelong facade, As her friends occupy their materialistic minds with each pair of shoes they are buying, She sees no shame in crying. To the men and women who witness the changing of lives, Of mothers, fathers, children, husbands and wives, Each day a symbol of persistent pride and triumphant tenacity, Their courage and service to humankind never denying, They see no shame in crying. To the teenage romantic who's doing it tough, Tired of being belittled and told they aren't good enough, The genuine battlers whose hearts are made of pure gold, Forget the doubters and keep on trying, Because there really is no shame in crying.

I missed it somewhere, some place, not viewable to the human eyes, not interpreted through the human brain I should of threw a spare, in this case, its not viewable through the human face Its not interpreted through so much space, its not viewable and not easy to replace this feeling of a waste of space, this feeling of the room closing in, getting smaller and smaller- Like being trapped inside an elevator, like hopeing and wishing to get off of it alive I always wish to hear from you late, while im waiting its a matter to survive Its a matter to get through this period of withdrawal, like a drug I can't let go I can't keep waiting, yet thats what I do, the time just becomes so slow like a clock that doesn't work, like a blinde person who needs Gods help to see I can't go on feeling so hurt I can't go on feeling so hurt I can't go on and if I do, Ill hurt myself and also you Picturing a bridge which is my escape driving 100 miles, ready to escape Ready to escape all the pain and agony inside, every thought of you and every fear of death escapes my mind in my car with the windows down, seat belt off, ready to drown I drive off the bridge, last thing I see is thoughts running in my head of you and me.... I slam my breaks, but it's to late this is the outcome of waiting, this is my fate--- __________________________________________ I'm bleeding and you can see that I am, yet you stick the knife deeper I am overwhelmed, and its because of you, i can't even look in the mirror without something to do with you I thought id be the everything inside of your life your soul companion, your future, your wife instead I seem to be just a toy that you like to play with playing with my life, my dreams, why can't i be the one you want to stay with? But on second thought, wish you'd go away, but as soon as you do, I beg you to stay and you cause me to love you again why can't you stop making my head spin why can't you accept everything i offer why don't you choose me instead of her?

He sat under the tree in deep meditation, He was determined to find out the truth or else never open his eyes again, He wanted to end suffering for him and for all, He wanted to determine the causes that one couldn't forestall, He was born as a king and yet he left all his kingdom, He had a wife and a son and a world full of possession, He saw sickness, old age and death and started questioning, Why does the world suffer and what is its beginning, Then he saw a monk who seemed happy and content, And he started the journey towards that which is hidden and latent. He suffered long and hard in this great discovery, He begged to have his meal, but it was no misery, He learned the art of silence, from the teachers he came accross, But never became satisfied as it did not cure the loss, So he decided in the end to walk on this path all alone, Be a light into oneself and do not ever become a clone, He saw others fasting, and he did the same, He ate so much less that he became lean and mundane, He realized that its a waste and had the milk from a boy, He accepted the service of the lady who wished him best of luck for future joy, And then he sat on the sheet of straw under the tree in deep meditation And he saw truth all at once and the beginning of compassion I bow my head in reverence at your feet, O' lord of compassion, You are the first human being to shatter the conditioning of a thousand years, all the suffering, all the possession.

Can't find reason to carry on, All color drained from my life. Said you couldn't stay, now you're gone, Lost my friend, my lover, my wife. Try to fit the pieces back in place, Still gotta face the morning sun. But I've grown so weary in this race, I ain't got, the strength, to run. So tell me please why don't you stay, I sure could use the company. No reason for you to go away, And take, your love, from me. This old dog is outta' tricks, Can't even stand to learn one more. Now bound with chains, torn with whips, Since you left, my ring, you wore. The house that we built stands alone, Nobody lives between its walls. Built from wood, love and stone, Like you, and I, it falls. So tell me please why don't you stay, I sure could use the company. No reason for you to go away, And take, your love, from me. All I loved and held dear, Has left me without rhyme or reason. So as I close my final year, In this, my final, season. Maybe one day just you and I, Will have another chance at this. And we'll meet in paradise, Your lips, again, I'll kiss. So tell me please why don't you stay, I sure could use the company. No reason for you to go away, And take, your love, from me. So tell me please why don't you stay, I sure could use the company. No reason for you to go away, And take, your love, from me. No reason for you to go away, And take, your love, from me. And take... Your love... From me...

The Bag and Poetry ------------------ He's a property developer, Ah, how foolish of me, he drives a BMW, And he likes poetry, and... Any man would love poetry if you asked him, He has his life, I have mine, it seems to work quite well, What a nice life you'll have. I hope it's so convenient in twenty years, When your children bear his name, and his face, Perhaps Louis-Vuitton will keep the sun warm While I follow my heart, And I drive a Mitsubishi, With my wife that hates poetry, And our lives, bitterly intertwined, Becomes a terrible inconvenience. ----- No real editing or purpose, other than to vent a little. I was hurt, shocked, and confused when she mentioned "my boyfriend". I felt like she seriously led me on, considering. These are some of the thoughts going through my head while she divulged some details about him. I realise it's bitter and sarcastic, and not at all attractive, it just had to be said somewhere.

What songs make you think of the love or un-love your wife/husband, gf/bf, or ex? Post why for each song as well!

Married 8 years; 2 Children ages 3, 5. Very light drinkers. No hitting or yelling at each other. No real deep conversation at all. Wife has been slowly falling out of love with me and has been admittedly faking feelings of intimacy for me for 2 years. Physical relationship has never been a problem - Mental connection is what we are missing. We haven't given each other any together (couple) time since the arrival of our first daughter. Also, my wife is a very poor communicator. She feels that I am too controlling and there is some truth there; I am critical and tend to overthink everything. I can be negative too often but I always to try to act in the best interests of the family. She works nights (large hotel manager) 3-11pm and most often gets home at 12:30 or 1:00am. I work days and am always home with the girls when I am not working. Pretty typical so far huh? She has dieted and lost 40+ pounds. She has become a Vegan (Full vegetarian) and works out alot. She has begun taking online classes to get her bachelors degree, and she has been buying very attractive clothes and is looking better than ever. I am proud of her and have repeatedly told her so. All of her actions are geared towards her. Her feelings came out a month ago while I was being playful one night with a copy of Mens Health comparing her thoughts to a magazine poll. Since then she wants us sleeping in separate beds with no physical contact of any kind except a peck when she leaves for work. We started reading Dr. Phil Relationship Rescue and I really respect his mehods and think he knows his stuff. I was optimistic about working things out by using this book together but she quit reading because she says it was hitting too close to home and her feelings are too far gone for the book to help. She had one session with a councelor this week and she says she will let this (hopefully) specialist figure it out. I hope this person is qualified to help us. My wife admits to the following: She has thoughts of cheating but insists she hasn't. If another man shows interest in her, she may not resist his advances. She pictures us divorced. She wants to make this work only because it is best for the girls. She is not sure that she can (or even wants to) love me the way I expect us to - mentally and physically through communication and closeness. She admits that she is only interested in her needs right now and that is what feels right to her. She is very tired of me asking her about infidelity and the consequences it would have on our family but she WILL NOT promise me that she won't allow it to happen while we are together. The thought is eating me but is out of my control. All she wants is space - alot of it! I feel the more space I give her, the further we will drift apart and the greater the chances of cheating. I have never considered her the cheating type until recently. She seems fine with this situation which has me all knotted up inside. My thoughts are totaly consumed with feelings of how did this happen, infidelity, lonliness, divorce, child custody. It is affecting me at work and my ability to keep a positive attitude around others. I want to see a lawyer to protect the girls and I (I cannot live without them - they are everything to me - especially now) should the seemingly inevitable happen. Nothing positive about resolution or loving acts of kindness come from her (Loving acts were never really something she did anyway) but I am actually asking her for something positive or hopeful which is pushing her away. She says she can't continue to make up feelings for me that aren't there. I will do anything (legal) to give us a long happy family life together but that turns her off. She is the only one I want. Wow I've laid alot out and sure I've missed some important facts but I've got to go - The girls are awake and I value time w/them more than ever. Any advice or good (easy reading) books? I'm feeling very lonley and insecure right now (I hate admitting that). Any good books on divorce might be helpful too. I should be educated on the possibility. Many thanks-

This poem I wrote most of it, the words in ''Italic'' are off songs that i related with...... Your love felt like a gift from God. Baby you and I we were so in love. We would've never given up. And you, You made me feel so high, by just looking in your eyes you made me feel so alive. We were blessed. I knew you loved me so, That look in your eyes was enough to let me know. I loved you with every breath that I took, with every beat of my heart. Would imagine one day I'd be your wife. Wouldn've died for you cos you were my whole life. Loving you was easy once upon a time but now my suspicians of you have multiplied. Just can't seem to get over the way you hurt me. As much as I wanna trust you I know it ain't the same. I may never understand why but I'm doing the best that I can. My heart was shattered and I tried to breath. My stomach in knots. I couldn't believe, I just didn't wanna see. I remember feeling like I was no good, that I couldn't do it for you. I thought you loved me? You said that I was the one. I gave you my everything, my all but it wasn't enough, I feel like you've given up. No Holding hands down the street. No kisses or falling at my feet. We were so wonderful, so magically beautiful. Wish you didn't change, Wish you stayed the same.

My wife was a victim of a emotional manipulator over Internet last year, someone who could make you feel guilty about breathing! He has a sixth sense for knowing what buttons to press to get you to do what he wants and has little or no reguard for others' feelings. The consequences of his attentions on my wife led to an adultery which seriously threatened our marriage. What are your experiences of this sort of person? What tricks do they use and what sorts of alarm signals should be looked for? Guilt and implicit blackmail seemed to play big time in his tactics, but what else do they use to manipulate more innocent and naiive people?

Vampire or Werewolf For my wife 2-12-1010 My wife has a Problem A quandary, conundrum Of who the real man is, for her. Yes stupid it seems How she’s caught up in dreams All for just some stupid… actor Who would ever pick these things These hopes and these dreams After all they’re ne’r gonna matter So silly it seems To be caught up in dreams All for just some stupid… actor? She’s really confused Me? not amused As to whom is the biggest heartthrob The Vampire, The Werewolf Seriously a werewolf??? Gosh, why can’t she just get a grip Rob? So as I toil and despair With this frightening fear trying to get on with my life I do not understand Trying to comprehend OK Fine I’ll just join my wife Looking them over One blood-sucker, one lover Just so sorry to inform you Rob But with that solid 6pack And a real nice lower back I myself must choose Jacob By Cam

Hey all. I am a college student and im sure that from other people looking at me they think that i have everything, well not everything, but i am well off. Not money wise... i mean i am in college, my parents are still paying for everything, im in a sorority, i have a boyfriend. Why am i not happy? I feel as though i dont know where i want to go in life, i dont know what i want to do. Im struggeling in my classes, sometimes i cant be bothered to go because i just dont want to be around people. Last year i went out all of the time and i had the time of my life! This year i never want to go out and be social. I just want to sit at home and think, stress, and worry. Although i hate to say it, i think that my boyfriend is playing a major role in this. We started seeing each other this past july and granted things have moved really fast. I stay at his house alll of the time and my parents dont know it, and im in love with him. Somteims i just wonder if he is who i should be with. He is an amazing guy and we are good for each other. He owns his own busieness, is sucessful, and good looking. However, his wife left him this past May. I know that they are never going to get back together, but sometimes i cant help but feel like the replacement wife. I know that he loves me, but i cant help bu t have these doubts. He has to drink at least three beers a day and he will even admit that he knows he has a problem with alcohol. It's not bad, it just gets aggrivating sometimes. He doesnt get drunk, he just likes to have a good buzz...................... i feel like my post is dragging and not getting my point accross... i wll just end it here because i could end up typing all night. Someone save me

I wrote this for the married man who I desperately want but will never take. Feedback would be lovely IN YOUR BED, IN MY HEAD I just got home from his fancy place Makeup and self-loathing smeared onto my face And you're not on me, not even one cell Whilst he's everywhere, my skin is his smell I can smell his being intertwined with my hair I can smell his lust and I can't even care Talk of self respect, talk of hatred When all I'm wondering is, "Will we make it?" And if we do, what does that entail? The double life you lead comes out unlevel on the scale Numbers, measures, percentage and scores I have you less and I think of you more I think of you now, I thought of you then I tried to envision you again and again It didn't bear fruits, reality stayed real His unwanted touch made an unloving steal And yes it's true, there was something lost I can't quite describe it but I worry of its cost Was it me? Was it you? Was it us? Was it my happiness? Is life that unjust? But justice for me isn't justice for her It isn't justice for him, and not for you, I'm quite sure You talk of your life as if it's all said and done And see my own as only begun But I cannot be your fountain of youth I cannot be your lie as she remains your truth I cannot be half-hearted, I can only be whole I have too much to give you, an entire soul So walk home to your house, be with your wife Know that having me will not give you my life For isn't it true? Isn't that what I've seen? In your eyes infatuation intertwined with specks of green We are so different, there lies the appeal But loving me will not my character steal You cannot become what you never will be I can never be you, you can never be me So what do you miss and how can I give it? You talk so much of life but not once think to live it I'm not your saviour, nor are you mine Though you once were my happiness for a splinter of time And the memory stays for me a guilded treasure In the darkest of darks it's my guilty pleasure I'm aware it's not my right to make you my claim I'm aware it's not my right, but I did it just the same And oceans did move and moments were made But as the oceans stayed the same, the moments did fade I desperately clung to them with an unwavering grip The oceans kept moving, the moments would slip I would love to have them back but not at any price I think that to like myself again would be nice She is just a name, one not too often said But she exists nonetheless, in your bed, in my head

I never thought I would be the kind of woman to have an affair but I did. 2 years ago I befriended a married man. I too am married, he for 6 years me for 12. He's 2 years my senior. We are both from the same social dance club, meeting about 3 times a week. We started out as simply good friends but the sparks flew and 6 months ago we started the affair. Even before I came into the picture he was having problems with his wife, both financially and romantically. Many times they almost headed to the divorce courts. I know this to be true as his wife confided in me intially too. But she and I had a major falling out back on new year's day. Ever since then she stopped accompaning her husband to the dance sessions. She kept feeling pangs of jealousy and felt hurt that her husband would choose to go out with his friends, a group of about 6 of us, and esp me, rather than spend time with her and they have not been on talking terms for about a month. Just last week things exploded. She and I had a major confrontation and had a shouting match with all kinds of nasty name calling in PUBLIC. Since then my lover started acting cold towards me. Normally we would talk for hours over the phone everyday but suddenly he stopped for 4 days, no msgs, no calls, nothing. I confronted him a few days back and we too had a shouting match of our own. He said that he felt scared of me and that he couldn't trust me anymore. He felt that I had purposely picked a fight with his wife so that she would leave him and he would choose to be with me. That is completely not true. I have my own family and would never go to him even if he split with his wife or me with my husband. We had this agreement right from the start. I felt so hurt and betrayed that he could think this of me. After tempers cooled we managed to talk for about 1/2 hr and agreed that we should stop being romatically involved. We also agreed to stay friends. The problem is this - We still will meet every week and my heart hurts so bad it feels like its going to burst. I've gotten so used to talking and messaging every day I feel so lost without it. Also I don't want to avoid him when we go dancing then everyone who saw me arguing with his wife will know it's true I slept with him. There has never been any proof because we never dated, only meeting occasionally in hotels. We have denied and denied and denied every rumour and I have to keep up the charade. How do I go on? How do I keep up this charade and not fall apart completely? I can't not go to the sessions then MY husband will get suspicious because he knows I love dancing too much to ever just stop for no reason. I hope someone can make sense of what I'm feeling but I think the main reason I'm posting this msg is that I can't talk about this to anyone. I think I just need some release. But if anyone can help, I'd be extremely grateful. Thank you for letting me get everything off my chest.

My wife and I have been married for almost ten years. Our marriage is great, we have 2 great kids together. My wife is a natural flirt, I knew this before I married her, but thought I could deal with it, and for the most part, I have been able to look the other way when she turns on the charm. Lately I haven't been able to. What triggered it all was I found out she was sending emails to a man at her new job. I'm not sure how far the relationship had gone, but there was some sexual content to the emails. When I found out, I confronted her and she stopped emailing him. She is still working with him (at night no less!) and I can't stop feeling jealous. I want to believe that there is nothing to it. After all our marriage has been through, I can't believe she would jeopardize it. But I still can't stop feelling jealous and anxious. Any ideas on what to do next??? Thanks,

Sunday will be 34 years from the night I proposed to my wife. I've never written a poem, but I did want to do something special because recently we had been reminiscing about that night.When she wakes up Sunday morning she'll find a dozen roses, and a card with this poem inside. I hope she likes it. December 20, 1975 There she sat, radiant as always It really hadn’t been that many days Still, I realized how much I’d missed her, My mind was made up and it couldn’t have been simpler. Falling in love with her had been effortless, It had been a fairy tale and she was truly my princess It was her I’d chosen I had to ask the question Was I nervous and anxious? After all, she was matchless, priceless and gorgeous If I was, I needn’t have been Her face lit up and immediately I knew deep down within Forever she’d be mine, not just my wife But my eternal love, my best friend for the rest of my life. Years have passed but one thing I know My feelings were right, and have continued to grow, Since that wonderful magical night, 34 years ago.

My wife and I just had a baby girl Nov. 15th, but my wife left me shortly after she got pregnant because I selfishly got her pregnant and she trusted me to do the pull out method. She robbed me of going through the pregnancy and being in the delivery room. Now she only lets me come over to her house twice a week for about an hour at a time. She's being civil to me. She has 3 other kids from a previous marriage. Her mother helps her take care of her children or somebody from her church helps her, babysitting. She made clear to me that she is divorcing me in March and that I need to accept it. I tried to talk her into giving me a second chance but she said no. I'm hurt and I wish she would give me a chance, but every time I bring it up she gets mad so I just go see my child and don't talk about us anymore. I lied to her when I said I didn't want her back anymore. How can i get my family back? And be happy again?

I love my father For he gave me life And I love my mother As he loves his wife For if ever there was evil it surely must be The curse that can run through a family Holding back truth and hiding ones heart Awkward on meeting and empty we part, If never given love you can never give love If you never stop to realise and look to above, So we build up our alibis and they seem to fit In the world which we live in and the way we live it, So who is the man? Who will stand up and say- "I know this evil; For I've lived this pain".

I enter this world with bitter sweet, The form that held me began to weep. Quite sure it was right but hard to do, I wonder if she misses me too. She could have gone a different way, With guilt that would have stayed. I, instead, allowed to play, Never knowing of her pain. A blessing and a curse, knowing not, Much like wondrous things I forgot. Growing up as a substitute child Craving love no matter how mild. I was lucky; I know it’s true My other mother loved me too. But again, she was called away, I cry when love ends that way. Twenty years on, I built this life, Enduring mistakes and loving my wife. Yet again, it’s hard to take, Another life she wanted to make. So, I sit here with myself, Trying to imagine what I felt. Watching her go, with my dreams in tow, And the secrets I did and did not know. Never feeling a negative thought But attempting ownership of my faults. Quite sure I am right but hard to do, I wonder will she miss me too. RM 9/2008

I love him more then words can say, I miss him more and more everyday. He lights up my life he is perfect for me, I just wish that he could see what I see. He is so wonderful the man of my dreams, In this life nothing is what it seems. He lifts me up when I am down and sad, He makes me feel beautiful and makes me feel glad. He knows how and what to do to keep me here, But as I look around I notice he is not near. He smells so nice and as I look into his brown eyes, It stops my pain and makes me forget all my cries. When he is around and when he holds me tight, Everything that has happened bad just goes out of sight. He is the most wonderful person that I could have ever met, My heart my soul my love my mind everything is set. I can hear his heart beat from a mile away, That just puts a smile on my face to know that he's ok. He is my true love he is the one that I want for life, I want to have his children and would love to be his wife. When he smiles and winks at me and kisses my forhead, I forget everything bad that was ever said. When he comes to see me and sings to me all night, It makes me feel safe and warm then I have no fright. He never breaks his promises he is always so true, This wonderful man im talking about has good ways to. Open your arms and give me a hug and smile for me today, I love you with all my heart and that is all I have to say. by me Tell me what you think?