!!!!------Losing the V------!!!!

I've put a lot of thought into having sex with my current boyfriend. We're both virgins, its a great relationship and I've been on the pill. We would also use condoms with spermicide. We're both very responsible, so please don't lecture me about sex!!

I have a question though.... GIRLS, what was it like when you lost your virginity? I know the pain of it really depends on him going slow, taking his time, using lube, all that stuff. But what I really want to know, is how much (if at all) did you bleed? Did you put a towel under you before hand? I know it depends on the girl, how tight she is, how big her hymen is, blah blah blah, I just want some personal experiences! lol

I've been on the pill, and when we have sex we definitely will use condoms with spermicide correctly, so the chances of me getting pregnant are extremely slim to none. Are there any other precations we should take?

I heard spermicide can weaken condoms. I'm not sure if it is, but I wouldn't take the risk.

first of all nothing is 100 percent effective aganist pregnancy there is always a small percent chance u can get pregnat even if you are on the pill or condoms or both. Second - i was 18 when i lost the big "V" for me its was not as how everyopne talked about, i felt no different, and the earth did not move..lol... What i can tell you is, let him know if he is hurting you, take it slow dont do it cause u have to do it beacue u want to and it feels right. Remember losing your innocence is a big step in each girls life no matter what age, Make sure he is the one . I suggest U think long and hard before u actually decide to go through with it. To me the best sex is the kind of sex thats unplanned but protected of course.

My first time took AGES.... we tried for about 2 weeks or something, on and off.. but the main reason why he couldn't get inside me was because I was scared, and clenched up my muscles and stuff...

My boyfriend suggested that I sit on top of him and use my own weight etc. to get him inside me, this way I could ease myself on... it worked!!

It didn't hurt much at all, there was a bit more friction... but it turned out good...

I did bleed a little, but I think it was related to troubles I had getting used to the hormone levels in the pill...

My first time was good. I didn't feel much pain & I didn't bleed at all that I was aware of.

Its different for everyone though. Some girls say its the most painful experience, some don't feel any pain at all. Some bleed, some don't. Your hymen may already even be broken. Have you used tampons, or gone horseback riding? Those things, along with others, can break your hymen.

Like someone else already said, just take your time & if it starts hurting tell him to stop, or go slower. Its not going to be painful for him, at least not as painful as it may be for you, so you need to let him know when you are in pain & such. You are in charge.

Basically everyone tells you that your first time should be perfect, but honestly, it may not be. It could be painful & not exactly as great as you hope it could be. It won't be perfect the first time, but you will always remember it & who it was with. There should be no regrets if you know you are ready & you lose it to a great guy who deserves you. This is your virginity, you can only give it to one guy. (sorry for the little lecturing.. i know you have thought it through, i'm just throwing that in there)!

I didnt bleed...but, it hurt only at first. He saw the pain on my face and asked me if i wanted to stop and i said no, because after a bit the pain went away and it was all good all the info i think you really need, i could give you more, but, er, i dont think its necessary.

I did not bleed at all my first time. It did hurt when he entered me but it went away quickly and started feeling good! Don't worry about it so much, just make sure to use a good lube and tell him to take it slow. And of course, like many have stated already, you are in charge. Don't feel bad about telling him to stop, slow down, or rest for a minute. If he really loves you, he will be more worried about if you are in pain then if he is getting off.

Its also good to stop every now & then while he is entering you, if it gets painful. Just stop where you are & just let yourself get used to the feeling.

I know everyone fears the pain of their first time, but just remember, it won't kill you.

Also, make sure you are as relaxed as possible. Make him give you a massage first or something. I was totally relaxed which could be a main reason I didn't feel much pain at all. Its so much easier if you just relax, although I know it can get difficult if you are nervous.

Hmm I am still a virgin ha ha and I would be curious to see what happens. But I am in no relationship now so it won't be soon, I guess.. Thanks to everybody for their input.

Yeah, I'm just totally curious as to really what happens. I think many people say "it hurts so bad" just to prevent teens from doing it. Haha, but maybe not.

I posted on here about this topic because, well... all my friends are virgins and extremely prude, so I obviously cant talk to them about it. My boyfriend is a virgin too, so he really couldnt tell me what its like, and if I asked my mom about it, she would flip! haha! My dad would be cool about it, and probably make it a relaxed and funny conversation, but I thought I'd just ask on here!

Thanks everyone for ur input, and thanks for not lecturing me. I've thought a lot about this, and I've taken the necessary precautions regard it also. Thanks again!

This is from a guy prospective.

When me and my gf went for the first time (she was a virgin i was not), I was actually unable to enter her. We used no lube and she certaintly wasn't wet enough. However the next time we tried I only went in half way (it was very very odd, and I feel bad because I feel like i didn't give her a good first time ). Finally the 3rd time I went full in, and she began to bleed... alot. Again we didn't use lube because she wanted it to be natural (she was on the pill). She put a towel underneath herself yes.

She was screaming (luckily her parents were out of town) from the pain... but she told me to keep going. Anywho its tough the first 3 times (actual full penetration not my 3 times) but then she says it started actually feeling good. She faked orgasm the first few times too... If I could give you any advice, don't tell him that, because then he will expect to have you come every time. So tell him what you trully are feeling, and don't make up anything. (She didn't come till about the 5th 'real' time)

ForAnother

oh yes I forgot to mention. The first poster said that spermacide can hurt the condom.... well then why does Trojan make a condom with spermacide in it?

Spermacide doesn't hurt condoms.

ForAnother

oh yes I forgot to mention. The first poster said that spermacide can hurt the condom.... well then why does Trojan make a condom with spermacide in it?

 

Spermacide doesn't hurt condoms.

 

ForAnother

That is true. A lot of condoms come with spermicide, so it couldn't be bad for the condom.

I actually heard that using a certain type of lube can hurt the condom? Has anyone else heard this too? I don't remember which type it was though. Maybe I heard wrong, I don't even remember where I heard that from. Anyone know anything about this?

Oh yeah, there are some lubes that can cause the latex condom to break down. When you buy lube u want to buy a water based lubricant such as KY Jelly or Astroglide. Oil-Based lubricants will cause a condom to break down and become weak which increases its chances of breaking. Basically, from what i've read, oil based lubes are for sex in water.

Also, dont use baby oil, or vaseline as lube b/c they will break the condom!!!

Oh yeah, there are some lubes that can cause the latex condom to break down. When you buy lube u want to buy a water based lubricant such as KY Jelly or Astroglide. Oil-Based lubricants will cause a condom to break down and become weak which increases its chances of breaking. Basically, from what i've read, oil based lubes are for sex in water.

 

Also, dont use baby oil, or vaseline as lube b/c they will break the condom!!!

I've never actually used lube before, I've never like bought it or anything either, so sorry if I sound stupid, but is there like a warning on the lube about that? I mean, thats really scary if a person doesn't know all that & they go out & buy lube. They could get the wrong kind. Does the lube actually have like a warning sign that will warn you of that so that you know??

Yes there is a warning. Anything oil based, nicluding vaseline, will wreck the condom. Use a water based one, wont harm the condom.

Maggie, I'm really not sure about that warning label thing! I've never bought it either, but I'd imagine it would have to be posted somewhere on it!

I found this on a website (dont know the URL, sorry!)

""""An oil-based lubricant may contain either mineral oil or a petroleum-derived oil (like Vaseline® does). Either way, it is very slippery and long-lasting, and it doesn't wash away as easily as a water-based lube. All oils cause latex to break down, so oil-based lubricants should never be used with a latex condom.""""

I think the only place you can buy oil based lube is in a sex shop, or something like that. I remember hearing somewhere that drugstores or supermarkets can only sell (or more commonly sell) water-based lube!

Well its a good thing to know: condoms and water based lube go great!

Yeah, thats really interesting actually.

So do you know if there really is a purpose for oil based lubes? I mean, if you are going to use a lube, why not just go for the type that doesn't harm the condom. Even if you don't use a condom, you'll still have it around just in case you decide to use a condom once or something.

Sorry if I sound kind of stupid about all this. I don't know much about lubes, since I never used it & don't really plan on it. I just find all this interesting for some reason.

Oil-Based lubes are commonly used for anal sex. This is because they are thicker, and more slippery which makes anal sex more comfortable. (I'm a virgin, but thats what I read)

Oil Based Lubes are also used for sex underwater. I dont know if you've heard of "hard water", but ever wash ur hands like twice and they are already dry and rough? Well, water in a pool is "hard water" due to the chemicals in it, so with the friction of ur bodies, you can get extremely dry down there. Oil Based lube is very thick and hard to get off, so it will stay on you even if you're in water.

.....sounds kinda kinky, but I read about this online someplace!.....

Hope it Helps!

Oh, thats interesting. Thanks!!

ok, i remember quoting, just for me ''i wont be worrying about a needle anymore'' this was a joke, but ill be honest it wasnt the most joyfull moment, it didnt last too long the pain, maybe a couple of seconds or so so that you realised it but i can assure you if it was special like mine then you wont worry about that, i did bleed quite a bit and we didnt use a towel but i did have to take a shower, i was surprised for me, that it didnt stop bleeding for a while, he was bigger than i expected him to be and the words ''i cant put a condom on yet because i am not fully erect'' was not my worlds best dream.

but i was lucky to have a man who looked after me and cleared everythign up, despite a tadge of pain and little too long a bleeding ME: it was great and i wouldnt have changed it.

Black magic

If you fret too much about it you might have problems--too tense and he can't penetrate you. I lost my virginity to an older man, who deflowered me at the end of a very romantic night highlighted with lots of kissing and touching and some wine to help steady us.

It was a really beautiful moment that hurt a bit as he pushed in and a little bit of surprise or something like that feeling another human being inside my body. There was a little blood, but nothing out of the ordinary. I took a bath the next morning, and I felt a dull kind of stabbing feeling (more like soreness) with the water in the tub. The next day that sore feeling didn't happen again, and it's been great ever since.

Welcome to the club! P.S. the only protection you're missing now is a crash helmet--relax! Enjoy! Let us know how it went.

KC