Feeling Uncomfortable At Work

My life is pretty simple - I work, I go home. Here recently, co-workers seem to be prying, indirectly, about my life. Even though there's not much to say about it, I don't appreciate their tactics - otherwise, I get along with them fine. I know that I'm not a typical male my age (I'm 30). I don't apoligize for who I am. I don't date much (or really at all) - two short terms in the last ten years. I don't talk on the telephone to anyone on a frequent basis. I live alone with my two dogs and I don't go out unless I really have to. I'm not depressed or feel a need to change - I'm content with my life. I'd really like to put an end to their prying without having to justify myself in the process. What should I do?

Have you tried telling your co-workers that their questions make you uncomfortable? Try telling them when they ask a question you do not prefer to answer that you prefer not to introduce your personal life into the work place, and that you prefer to keep them as separate as possible. A good co-worker will understand.

If that doesnt work for you, try staying busy, so you dont have to conversate with your co-workers and your not giving them the chance to pry. I understand that that may not be an easy thing to do.

I wouldnt reccomend going to your boss unless its absolutely necessary, doing that may cause tension between you and your co-workers.

What they are doing isn't technically wrong. I think they're just trying to figure out just who I am. I'm who they see everyday, but I guess they can't accept that. For the few that I've told (what I've said above), I always got the impression that they didn't believe me - they can't relate to me and a few have actually said that. So right now, I'd rather not go down that road - it's old and tired and the results are always the same. In the end, it's always a waste of time and quite frankly I'm getting tired of going through the motions. The thing that's making me uncomfortable is their coy way of asking - thinking that there's more to me than what I've told them. It's like they're trying to steer me down a road that doesn't exist with their questions. Overall, I just don't get why they think I would lie to them.

It never fails to amaze me why some people are so disturbed by someone who is content to live the single life. I have found through my own experiences in the past that such a life can be just as fun and rewarding as any relationship.

In the end, you don't need to justify your existence to anyone.

I see nothing wrong with telling your coworkers, however good their intentions to "draw you out", that you're a private person and really would rather not share your private life in the 8 or so hours you're at work. Generally people at work ask only to be friendly or to offer a friendship, however limited (since most friendships founded at a workplace don't last outside of it). Most people have no problem sharing little parts of their lives. I can understand your perspective though, since I don't share too much about myself at work either. It's my job-I do it and I go home and forget about it. I don't see the need to make "friends" that I won't hang out with outside of work, and prefer the few good ones I already have.

Just let the next person who asks know that you'd rather keep your private life separate and aren't a "sharing" kind of person in that regard. You might be labelled as standoffish or slightly snobby, but I'm guessing others' opinion of you wouldn't sway you very much, so that's not an issue! Say it with a smile-smiles can diffuse a gentle rebuff quite a bit.