abortion/adoption?

..i think i am pregnant and everything has crossed my mind lately..abortion..adoption..everything and i thought adoption would be too hard and would leave me depressed where as abortion i wouldnt be so depressed but theres a possibilty of not being able to have kids in the future which i dEF. want!...my ex was adopoted and he actslike this is the worst thing that could have happened to him..even tho he lives in the upperclass houses of this town..which is doing fairly well and he has wrecked about 4 or 5 cars and his parents have bought him a new one EACH time he has practically the perfect life but him being adopted has brought him to the point of abusing drugs and now and alcoholic since he has recently turned 21. hes depressed alot and threatens to kill himself and has physically put his hands on me(which is why he is my EX) i dont want my kid to be like that but i am still in high school and can hardly pass an alegbra class much less raise a kid..so i guess what im asking is.. is killing somebody better than giving them away?..i really dont knnow which is better becuz i know i cant keep the kid..i would want to but i cant take care of it..what should i do?

Hi swtangel...

I am alive because my mother chose not to end my life, I was given up for adoption. Without that choice, I wouldn't have typed this message... really think about this. I have had a wonderful life because of it...

I really urge you to read this post I wrote today... please!

link removed

I'm not saying that it's your only option, just really think about the fact that if my mother had made the other decision (abortion), I wouldn't be sitting here right now, and I wouldn't be a happy and successful person.

My adopted parents gave me the most love and support, and still do. They are some of the most wonderful people to walk the earth, and they were in tears 22 years ago on the day they were able to bring home a new baby son...

Please read that post, it might help you in your decision...

Good luck, we're here for you either way!

S.A.M.

Although I can't tell you the "correct" decision to make, I would urge you to do what you feel is right. I understand that you're very confused at this point, but if you were to fast forward to the future, after having the baby aborted, how would you feel then? Your boyfriend may feel that adoption is worse than abortion, but many loving families adopt children and give them the best life they possibly can. Personally, I don't believe in abortion, but that's beside the point. If I was in your position, I would give the baby up for adoption. You never know who your child will end up with, but SS does everything to the best of their ability to ensure that the children are placed in a caring family.

I am saying this partly b/c I'm pro-life and VERY anti-abortion and partly b/c...it's just a very bad medical procedure. I've done research on abortion. If the doctors tell you that the baby in you cannot feel a thing...it's total CRAP. The child will feel more pain than you during the procedure. They can live hours after as well...suffering. It's not good for a woman to have an abortion b/c it can lead to SERIOUS depression. You can get many infections and even have parts of your baby left inside of you. Adoption is the best way to go in my eyes. Not all adoptions are success stories of course, but sometimes you have to do it to give your baby the righ it has...to have a life. You can't predict what your child's life will be like but you can list yourself so that your child may find you when they're older and maybe you'll be reunited one day. Your baby deserves their life...children are innocent they shouldn't have their lives taken away.

i left out a lil bit of the story..i have miss 2 periods so i ThInK im pregnant..i had been using quite an amount of drugs in my first month of pregnancy. when i missed my first period and the thought that i may be pregnant crossed my mind i quite the drugs, drinking, and smoking cig. i dont do anything to hurt my child i am afraid that already my baby could be damaged becuase in the first few months of development it is the most important. So if i was to give my baby up for adoption it may have some complications. I dont know if i could live with myself to have to hand MY bad choice to someone else but also i dont know if i could have an abortion it would just kill me inside taking another life, but i am struggle to get thro school much less a regular child but a child with a disability...i just couldnt do it..

the pains u get can be from alot of things. cervical cancer to cist on the ovaries maybe u should go see a doctor..i have missed 2 periods so far and i need to take a test because unfortunately i have been smoking and drinking and doing drugs again which is in no way healthy for me OR the kid!!...i havent really thought about my decision since i really dont know if im pregnant or not...u should really get off the birthcontrol if u think u are pregnant..i got pregnant on it and i kept taking it i stopped taking it a week before i had my miscarriage..i believe that is what killed it..since then i have not taken one single bc pill again!! so be careful go get a doctors approvial before trying it!

Go to a doctor, find out for sure if you're pregnant and how may weeks along - that will let you know what all your options are. Ignore Smokey Cat - you don't need someone spouting pro-life propaganda at you right now, fetuses do not survive outside the womb prior to 19 weeks (and that is chancey at best). If that is the right decision for you at this stage in your life, don't let anyone convince you otherwise.

As for adoption, an individual is very responsible for how they react in their own life. Your EX is old enough to be held responsible for how he acts, its not anyone's fault. There are many children who aren't adopted you act far worse that he does and many adopted children who are healthy, loving individuals. If you decide to have the baby and give it away, take comfort in knowing that you made the right decision at the time, you can't be expected to do anything more than that.

thanks EVERYONE for your replys they were a big help!! but i would like to update everyone on me..im not pregnant i was kind of sad when i found that out..for some reason i wanted to be pregnant...how weird is that?..im even kind of depressed..but i guess im very relieved no more worrying and next time ill be alot safer!!..but thanks everyone for the help and encouragement!!