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Thread: My boyfriend is very insecure & jealous, HELP??

  1. #1
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    My boyfriend is very insecure & jealous, HELP??

    I am really in love w/ this man, but he is extremely jealous. He is always accussing me of cheating on him, and it is so not true! He is firm on what he thinks, and there is no discussion. Just the other day I left him at my place alone and he went through everything! He thinks I am cheating on him and doesn't want to be with me anymore. What do I do? I don't want to let him go because I love him a lot, but I'm not sure if this is a healthy relationship or not! Help?

  2. #2
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    First of all welcome to Enotalone! I think that all you need to do is talk to him and remind him that he's the only person you love. Show him how much you love him by taking him out or something! If you need more help AIM me at greengrape102!

  3. #3
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    You have to tell him up front what do you have to do to prove to him that you're dedicated to him. If he can never trust you, things won't work out. Look at the big picture, the relationship is one-sided right now. What can you do to balance it back to what it should be?

  4. #4
    Bronze Member segagirl's Avatar
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    Hi there, I will have to agree that asking him what you can do is important, I have a feeling though that this has been done before? I have a feeling that you have been trying to talk yourself out of these situations for a while now. Sometimes people let their emotions get the best of them, it is sad he is not able to see the wonderful and dedicated woman you are. But at this point, he is responsible for making the changes, not you. This time, if I were you I would sit back, and wait for him to come back...and make sure he understands you will not be accused or yelled at about it anymore.

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  6. #5
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    A lot about being in a relationship is being able to be honest and trust each other... you need to remind him how much you love him and how he is the only one for you and you would never think of cheating on him. Ask him why he thinks you would or are cheating on him... then tell him that you would never do or even think of doing such a thing.

  7. #6
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    hey

    If he didn't find anything...why should he be jealous? keep assuring him that you wouldn't cheat on him and you love him. everyone else pretty much summed it up for me

  8. #7
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    jealousy

    I could have written your post myself. I'm the gal who was jealous of the cat because my bf has been giving me the cold shoulder, and all his attention to the cat. Anyway, I confronted him and found out that he has been suspecting me of cheating on him. When I told him that's not the case, he called me a liar, and all sorts of bad names (&%#@!, etc.) We had a fight over that, and he got into a drunken rage and tried to kill the cat. I took all his verbal abuse quietly, and then I fled town for two days. (But now I'm back because he needs me. ) I don't think it solves the problem for me to tell him how much I love him - he does not believe it. (The truth is, he has touched my soul and I love his being). But he needs to feel he is lovable. I suspect the same is true of your boyfriend. Maybe your bf has been hurt too many times before by other women. There are women who use men, jerk them around and cheat on them. Well, ultimately this is something that he has to work out himself. The most you can do is just be there, consistently, through good times and bad.

  9. #8
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    I understand completely. My ex used to get jealous when a guy would look at me. For example we were at a pub and this guy smiled at me and my boyfriend pulled me close and muttered under his breath "this is my woman". Then he went to the bathroom and told his friend to keep his eye on me. Are you and your boyfriend equally attractive. Sometimes and I know it is stupid but if one person is less attractive they get more jealous. I have given up on dating the ck underwear guy models (in my dreams i know!) and have started to look at personality and how they treat me however those are the ones that are the most jealous! I am such a devoted and faithful individual that I think it is so ridiculous the guy could think that about me! I wish u the best of luck and just keep re assuring him. But if it gets to the stalking point then u have to let it go and he has to deal with his insecurity. Maybe he was burned b4. I never was jealous until i had been cheated on.


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