Ask For Advice
Results 1 to 7 of 7

Thread: my girlfriend want to date other guys

  1. #1
    Cuu
    Member Cuu's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2003
    Posts
    26

    my girlfriend want to date other guys

    just venting...

    AAHAHAJHAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I HATE YOU1@!!!!!!!!! I'M WAS A MAN OF COMPASSION, NOW I HATE EVERYTHING IN THIS FRICKIN' WORLD!!@

    5yrs relationship over just a lil under 2 weeks ago. she's already talking about wanting to date other guys. i told her that i think it's too soon and kinda disrepectful to me. she told me she's fine if i was dating other people too. the problem is i don't want to start dating, but i told her it's ok if she does (it kills me to say it). i'm a real jealous freak and just learned not to be.

    my problem is i'm afraid to fall in love again. i don't get how she can forget everything we've had so quickly. are all girls like this? cuz if they are, i can't see myself ever liking another girl in my lifetime. i can't stand the crying and the heartaches any longer. i hate love. love sucks a big one. i hate girls. they all just want the easy way out and end things like it was just a game for them.

    there are so many things going through my mind right now. i do not want to share them with you, because you'll all tell me to seek help. i've been betrayed, and i'll never search for love again.

    she gave me some old cliche saying if we're meant to be blah blah blah..
    i told her i can respect her decision, and i'll wait for her to come back.
    but deep down i know she ain't coming back. she wants to leave me so she can go clubbing with her friends while i'm at home worrying about my business. business isn't doing so well so i'm constantly worrying. still doesn't give her any right to go freaking some guy at a club. i don't mind her dancing with guys, but freaking them isn't right. i mean, what guy would like to have their girlfriend getting grinded by some other guy??

    also, i have a quick question for all the girls. do you girls feel all tingly with your man all the time? my gf said she doesn't feel that anymore. i know 5 yrs can do that to a relationship. i told her i didn't feel it anymore too, because she doesn't care about me enough for me to feel it. but i do love her like crazy.

    i think about suicide all the time. :2gunfire: please don't tell me i need help. i want the hurt to stop so bad. i just want everything to be ok again. 5 yrs wasted and i ain't about to waste another 5 yrs.

  2. #2
    BeenCheated
    Member BeenCheated's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2003
    Location
    Sweden
    Age
    43
    Posts
    26
    Look on the bright side, at least you didn't have any kids.

  3. #3
    killer_bimbo
    Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2003
    Posts
    70
    You're talking like your still together. Yes, it is quite disrespectful to start seeing other people after 2 weeks of ending a long term relationship, but you don't really have any right to ask her not to anymore now you've broken up. She's not committed to staying faithful to you anymore. As for you, you can make your own mind up as to when you start seeing other people, and it's perfectly natural not to want to fall in love again for a while after the end of serious relationship, but that feeling will pass. I'm a man, and although you ask the girls, this is my take on your last question. The tingly feeling you get at the start of the relationship does pass, turns into something different, just a real deep happiness and satisfaction when that person is around. The tingly exciting stuff you still get, just not all the time. It's all a part of a relationship developing. The tingly trembling thing I think is a sign of falling in love, that initial infatuation and excitement when lust starts to turn to something deeper, the lovely warm, happy, womb like feeling with someone, I think is a sign of a mature relationship that's developed past the infatuation stages. But again, the tingly trembly exciting feelings should come back sometimes when things get passionate

  4. #4
    doblersdream
    Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2003
    Location
    Northern Ireland, UK
    Age
    42
    Posts
    105
    Gender
    Male
    Hi Cuu

    Sounds like you're going through a tough time, so hopefully we at eNotalone.com can do our best to help you.

    It's good that you've accepted that she may not come back to you. Many people in your situation don't reach that step for a long time. I know this from personal experience, and do understand how you feel.

    The advice you'll get may sound cliched, but that's only because it's true. It will take time. You will get over it. How you go about it is up to you. The most obvious way would be to lean on friends, talk to them about it. Don't bottle it up. Go out and have some fun - something that won't remind you of your ex. It will help you to see a world without her, trust me. Basically, keep yourself as busy as possible, and time will take care of the rest.

    I know what you mean about not understanding how women can do the things they do at times, but let's face it - us blokes can do it too. We maybe just don't realise it. You'll only torment yourself by trying to analyze what she has done, because you'll never know. Chances are she doesn't fully know herself.

    Try writing down everything you feel and send it to her, then cut contact. Don't make her feel guilty though, because that will just drive her away even more.

    Best of luck!!

  5. #5
    Marianne
    Member
    Join Date
    Jul 2003
    Age
    34
    Posts
    45
    Cuu , i recently broke up with my boyfriend of 6yrs and i know how you feel but i will agree with you about go out with guys too soon i mean for me it will be hard to fall in love over again if i am going to go out with any other guys im going to be friends with them first . it will take time to get use to life just tell her how you feel and stay contact as friends still thou

  6. #6
    Cuu
    Member Cuu's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2003
    Posts
    26
    Its so hard to stay positive. Thanks for all your replies. I've basically read all the threads here and learned a lot from you guys. I've tried talking to all my friends about this, but there are only so many friends that are willing to listen to the same thing over and over. They do help me forget reality for a few hours, though. It's just that I exploded tonight because today is our 5yr anniversay.

    I lay down on my bed and I see flashes of our moments together. I also have been having weird dreams. I see my ex (yeah, it does feels weird calling her my ex) with another guy and I'd wake up breathing heavily punching the air. Hehe, I'm going insane.

    I just want to vent here, because I think my friends are tired of me. please don't feel obligated to reply. This is very theuraputic for me. I get drunk and type out how I feel. It helps me make it through to see another day. Thank you.

  7. #7
    Guest
    Hey Cuu,

    You are not alone, i am going through the same process. My girl left me 4 days ago after five and half years, and the day before her 21st birthday. She also wants to go out clubbing, in fact she did last night which I agree, was incredibly quick and hurts to know that other guys were out there with her. I dont have any real hard answers for you, but I can tell you what I did and maybe it will help.

    The most important thing is find some support. Friends, family, here, wherever, just find someone you can open up to and tell them everything. I am competely changing a lot of my habits also. I went out to a bar the other night at midnight when I had to work at 5 the next morning, so what if its late.....its something I would have never done before when I was with her. In my case I have an Ex before her that I've remained friends with, I'm taking her out as friends just to kinda cut loose a little bit, help me catch the reality of it. Do what you can to stay away from her or anything that reminds you of her, as hard as it may sound.

    As for her feelings, she feels the exact same way my girl said. She loves me, but not IN love. She feels tied down, all shes ever known is our relationship and she wants to experience new things (clubbing and guys). My partake on this has changed a lot in these past days. At first I thought, what did I do wrong??? But now it is, she just needs to find herself and realize who she is. The truth of it is, you know her better than anyone. If you think she is the type of person who wants a relationship, family-oriented, and NOT the club type or multiple guy type, she probably isnt. She just needs to know herself for sure. The best thing is to let her go out and find out that she isnt like that. Let her try it and see, because once she realizes that shes not that type of person, chances are she'll come back to where her roots are laid best.
    I think you should get the mind-set that its her loss (even though its hard). Think of it as "hey, fine. I can go out and have fun too then." The moment she starts thinking you wont be there waiting for her when she comes back is the moment when she starts to think aboiut things totally different. I got lucky and told mine last night before she went out. I told her I wanted her to have fun, go out and find out who she really was. That I know who she really is and that I know shes not the clubbin type but instead the relatinoship/commited type. Until she realizes that on her own though, she will always wonder. Give her space, tell her if you dont call that its not because you dont care. Start moving ahead with your life and if she decides thats not the way she wants to live, she'll let you know. And if she deicdes she does want to be in the clubbing thing and "freak" with all the guys, then she's a different person than the one you started dating anyhow and its easier to move on knowing that. Good luck, I know exactly how you feell. PM me if you need anything at all.

  8.  

Top Threads
My girlfriend has cut me off after such a brilliant year and my life is in ruins
I am a mid thirties guy from the UK and my girlfriend is also in her early thirties from the US. We met a year ago (Sept 2015) I was living in Dubai
ex sent me nude pics
I've been in no contact for the past months. I blocked him on social networking and it really felt good. It helped me in moving on...and I felt
Still missing him
Hi all, So here I am, just past four months post break up, and nearly three months of 100% NC. I'm trying to do the right things for myself
The pain is unbearable
I have posted here so much about my break up but I have these moments where I just cannot get up. He called today to tell me he was in another state
Forgive but don't forget.......similar to holding resentment?
Hello All, I was having this conversation with a few folks from this board regarding this. This is largely for the ladies on this forum, but
Heartbroken after being used as a rebound.
Hello everyone. :) I'm 20 and I'm a bisexual. I've been in love with girls a few times but it never worked and it also faded quickly too. This year
Request for Ideas
Hello lovely folks. bit of a background who haven't seen any of my threads. gf broke up with me giving me shyte reasons. now i am fending for

Expert Advice
Featured Threads
Weird crazy breakup
Here goes. We was together 4 and a half years, lived together for the most of that with her grandparents, yeah moved in pretty quick because of
is my bf racist? is there a future?
I am a bit dumbfounded and confused.. pls comment.. I have been dating my bf for 3 years. I look asian and he looks european. Things have not always
Great conversation but she Ghosted me?!
When I asked for her phone number, she kinda looked at me (the really dude? face). I knew it was over, but seriously it bothers me that we had a
My Girlfriend's Extreme Anger and Dramatic Behavior Are Ruining Our Relationship
This is gonna be a long one. Bear with me.. Okay, so this is my absolute first post on any forum ever. I am a 21 year old male, and I am currently in
Wrapping your head around an incurable condition
How does one do that ? While my condition is not fatal it is incurable and my life quality will steadily deteriorate over time. Most possible will
My mom kept a secret for 28 years
I'm 28 years old, my mom always told me to not sleep around, said she never slept w anyone till she got married, etc. well randomly tonight she tells
Confusing relationship with ex
So my ex and I broke up about 3 months ago. There was a lot of hurt, I was really depressed for the first weeks until I got back on my feet and
Ask For Advice

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •