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great idea but be careful


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I believe Cyber-dating or finding your mate through the internet is a very good way to find your partner in life.

 

There are many reasons for this, First off you can be more selective, because of the fact that you can make so many contacts over a period of time, you can invest interest and time to the ones that fall within the attributes your looking for.

 

Second; No need to pretend to be somebody else. Ok let me give you an example, There is this girl(or guy) you like, you take her out, no matter how much you want to just be yourself, we all "adapt" a little, first off we dont want to sound too contradictive or confrontive. we try to impress her and feel the pressure to make it work at all costs.

 

Third; In physical dating, you feel awkward and a little uncomfortable just saying no more, i mean, you take the girl out, and realize she is very sweet and kind and she likes you a lot, but she is just not what you expected, ok now what do you do? you tell her hey your not my type, a little uncomfortable to say that to a persons face. Cyber-dating is a bit different, because its not the same kind of dating your just chatting, as friends, "testing the waters" if shes not what you were expecting or hoping for, you just dont take it further than just chatting over daily events, no one gets their Egos bruised or feels guilty. (for the most part).

 

Forth, Cyber-romantics communicate more, they are people that are interested in more than just a physical relationship, they communicate their thoughts and feelings in words.

 

Fifth, youll be able to meet people that under normal circumstances would have a hard time finding, again an example, Me for instance, I dont Club, or do bars, and not interested in having a girl that frequents these places all the time, I mean. my perfect partner, is probably the girl that lives a block away from me, that ill never meet because her lifestyle like mine doesnt take them to places where most people meet.

 

Cyber-dating automatically filters out those that are less patient and serious, todaymost people want instant gratification, they want fast food, fast cars, and they want a "perfect" relationship now! if any little inconvinience comes along, they dump their partners and look for the next "perfect" guy/gal and try again, seems no one wants to put much effort into a relationship nowdays, cyber-daters are patient people, they know that if they do find their match, distance is an obstacle, but its that obstacle that separates those that will put effort into a relationship from those that are more likely to breakup at any little sign of difficulty.

 

cyber-dating or finding a loved one on the net is not perfect, people can and do still lie, you still have to be careful as in physical dating with those that are just looking for company, or to satisfy their egos, they could be on the rebound and just want to feel good about themselfs and try to win over some hearts.

 

But for the most part, it wont take long for you to find out where their heart is and what their real intentions are. after all, my whole purpose of cyber-dating/chatting is to find that special someone to love and have in my life forever. others may just be looking for just "chat". I have had only two online romances, one about 5 years ago, the first didnt work out, but nothing to do with distance or anything. the latest one, well not sure on the verdict, its still pending, but doesnt look good, a case of rebound on her part. she needs her "space" and "time" to think, we have all heard that one, so you know what my chances are, but then iam a hopless romantic, and maybe she will think, and realize that forward not backwards is the way to go. but thats a whole other story.

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Hi Silly,

 

First of all welcome to eNotalone.com and thank you for coming to us with your article. I agree with your article and I also believe in finding a partner over the internet. I have been involved in a couple before and I really liked it. With one it even came to me (being from Europe) meeting someone in the US. Afterwards we figured there were too many complications anyways, but it did last for pretty much two years.

 

It's not just partners you can find on the internet. I have made some very close friendships over the past seven years that I have been on the net now. For me it's really important, because I don't really relate to my own country(wo)men. When I am talking to a friend, nine out of ten they are from outside my own country.

 

You have to be careful on the net for sure. There's a lot of impersonators and people pretending they are someone else, but I still find it a comfortable way to make friends.

 

~ SwingFox ~

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I think online dating isn't exactly the ideal way to meet anyone, there is a lack of physical expression and all the other person can see is what you type for example you would have no idea if the person is really what you think they are, and even if they are then what are you going to do about it? About all online relationships eventually boil down to "long range" relationships which don't work out anyway. In my oppinion, online relationships can be serious but for the most part they facilitate people who are unable to get into a relationship otherwise.

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Hello Aloneforever

 

I do agree, about long distance relationships that go on "long term" the whole idea is to Find that person, I have no problems relocating to any part of the planet, money, and possesions mean little to me if you dont have someone to share them with.

 

Maybe Iam an Idealist, but still believe that nothing is more important than Health, and Love, the rest is all vanity and creature comforts.

 

So Internet is great for "finding" not good for maintaining, i totally agree, there has to be physical experiences to go along with all this eventually.

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I have a bit to say on this subject.

I recently got into a online relationship with a girl from a messageboard. Incredible girl, funny, intelligent, artistic, LOVes anime (a definite plus), loves animals, shes so sweet. Anyway, I stayed clear of being anything but a friend until one day, something just clicked between us. Now shes had a hell of a rough life, battling ulcers and back injuries, tonsillitis..lots of htings..but shes definitely a fighter. Anyway, I got sidetracked. I was trying to say basically that our love is definitely genuine, we both act true to ourselves (I AM a hopless romantic at heart and I love her for who she is not what she looksl ike (though she Is pretty)) and both have an idea of what the other is like IRL. It also hleps that we trust ech other, though She still sort of trying in that respect, because her previous 2 relationships almost made her quit trying altogether. She wants to completely trust me, its just a bit difficult considering her past. I understand that and Im working with it.

Now I also believe that moneyand materialistic things are of little importance. Ill go wherever I have to spend whatever I have to to be with my sweetheart. Thats not a problem. So I think my relationship has a very great chance of succeeding. I think actually that if both people give it their all, that this sort of relationship WILL work out.

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