keeping a conversation going & talking one on one

this is my worst problem of all...starting a conversation and keeping it going

everyone else can just pop up with a topic in their head ... but i cant.. i overplay the usual (, do you like this song....what did you do on the weekend, ...etc) argh...i need some ideas.. I had a date, and it MURDERED me....the silence was deafening.

the most helpful thing would be a stratagy for developing these...but ANYTHING would be much apreciated.

my second worse problem .... is talking to a girl when she is with other people

i have only talked to the girl i like 4 or five times (with help from prior resposes from you people ), but there were only the times where she was alone. (ie. in the library, walking to class, etc)...

i dont know her friends at all, and i dont know how to approach her when she is with her friends...do you see? HELP ME SOMEONE PLEAAAAASE

Hi,im Customizer!

Actually i've got a problem as u've got too. The problem really farkup wif me...and when i met the girl i like, i willl got nth to say wif her..as u say ask her where u go, wat movie u like..etc! But some of my friends said that, to impress a girl..u no need to think much wat u should talk but u jz be yourself and talk whenever the words is in your brain! But don talk crappy things when really gt no idea talk about! Just leave it quiet , nor the girl will say u are annoying or irritating! If u wan the topics more interesting, ask her feeling...galz like boys to know about her feelings...

and ask her interested thingys..such as idol etc!

Gd Luck To u!

Just try making a list of things you would like to know about her. Maybe you can even add some things you think she might find interesting about you? Then read over it until you have it memorized. I think this might help, because at least you wont feel like you are asking her twenty questions. Try to mix in some comments that are just observations and compliments arent a bad idea either. Make sure the compliments are sincere though. I will tell you after almost every conversation I have with someone I like I feel like I have said all the wrong things so that must be just natural? Dont be to tough on yourself it is hard to risk rejection.

actually , the big problem with talking, is BEING MYSELF. i just locked up on that date, and wasn't comfortable for a while, not till the very end..wtf...anyway i can just loosen myself up fastenr

Hey I know how you you feel.

I met a beautiful and intelligent girl on the weekend. She seemed very interested in me. Everything was going well throughout the night conversational wise and every now and then I would get stumped on what to say or ask her. At times I thought I was boring her. Finally I built up enogh courage to ask for her number she gave it to me and asked me to call her the next day. (today) I still have yet to call her because I don't know what to talk about and i'm afraid of screwing things up with her. Any other suggestions on how to deal with this anxiety????

My best advice would be to ask her a question that requires a long answer, something you can build on. Favorite movies and songs are all one word answers and will leave you wondering what to ask next. Ask them questions about their life for example, if they have a job...Where do you Work? Really do you like it there? Build off of your questions. A conversation of just question after question can get boring and repitent, Get more stuff to talk about through a question.