advice on BF of 1Yr insecurities

[/color I have a little bit of a problem, and im not sure exactly what topic it fits under but i thought this one was ok. ok well here it goes. a little backround first- i am currently dating my boyfriend for one year, and my ex was two years long. i broke up with my ex and starting going out with my current a week later. my mother pased away almost two years ago, but i am just now seeking counseling. i did not really get along with my father when i was younger, he was the typical strict father, but after my mother passed away we became closer, but we didnt really develope a relationship. ok so the problem is that i need attention, and i am not sure if this is a bad thing or just a trait. my boyfriend is great but not too emotional, and i get upset when he doesnt take a minuet from work to call and say hi or text me. but he does call just not all the time. i just want him to maybe leave a note, or a flower, just some solid evidence that he cares and thinks about me. we have talked about this, and he improves, but i really think its me. i have insecurities, and i cant always expect him to call just when i am thinking of him and want him to call. can someone tell me what i should think? my friends think iam crazy and i need to relax or i will ruin a good thing.

please give me some advice

-Emotionally stressed

Hi Ro,

Thank you for posting to eNotalone.com again. I have read your post and I hope that my suggestions will help you.

First of all, you're not crazy. Yes, you seem to be very emotional, which I think is a good quality of life. Obviously you are looking for emotion in a relationship, too. Unfortunately, in general guys are not as emotional as women are. Of course there are exceptions, but in general guys are less emotional.

My suggestion to you is to express your appreciation towards your b/f when he DOES call you or brings you flowers. May overdoing it a little doesn't hurt. You want to stimulate him to do it more often. I think that you talking to him was a GREAT idea, too.

My second suggestion is to find out WHY you want him to call you or bring you flowers. A good trick is to make a journal how you exactly feel when you want him to call you or bring you flowers. That way you find out what your true emotion is at that point. Talk to your b/f about that, too (i.e. "I feel profoundly sad now, because I miss my mom").

I hope this helped you. Communication leads to a better understanding. I wish you good luck

~ SwingFox ~