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16 with another baby


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my first daughter i had when i was 15 and she means everything to me.my parents were fine with me having her and at first my daughters dad was too. now hes into drugs really bad and i wont send my daughter over there to see her. and the only reason he wants to see her is because hes mad that i'm living with my new boyfriend that loves my daughter like his own and now i'm pregnant with his baby. there's no problem with money or anything like that, my boyfriend owns his own business, but the problem i'm having is that now my 1st babies father is being a jerk and no matter how hard we try to get rid of him he always comes back and wont let us be.he doesnt even love my daughter he even said that.and now my mom's being a b!tch about everything and cant except the fact i'm having another baby.i'm in homeschool so its not like i'm ruining my life. i just dont know how to tell her that everything's fine and i dont know how to get this other guy to leave me and my baby alone..please help....alicia

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I have one piece of adivice for you. Stop having sex until you are married. I dosn't matter if he is "ok with having a baby" it is not time for you to be a mother. You might think you are but you are not and you are ruining your life as long as your children's and everyone around you that cares about you. Sex was planned to be for marriage for two people that are legally bound to each other. Love does not have anything to do with it if you are not married you shouldn't have sex. Sex with someone outside of a marriage will only lead to problems like you have. You need to get yourself away from all these "relationships" with your boyfriends so you can see clearly. If you stop and consider what I am saying you will begin to agree with what I am saying. You done what you have done and you cannot change that but you can change you future. Listen to what you parents have to say and be patient they know what is best for you. They may not be perfect but they love you the way you ought to be loved. Don't ruin you life with some sweet talking good looking guy that is just in it for the sex. A man who really loves you will want you to wait. Someone who cares about you will think about how this will affect your future and will do what is best for you. This "Love" thing you have with your boyfriend will cloud your mind when making descions that you will have to make. Give your self a break and think for your self and see what is best for you and your kids and do not worry about your boyfriends.

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ok, i dont see how i'm ruining my life if i have my own place a nice car, my daughter is well taken care of, my boyfriend owns his own business and i'm in homeschooling, and i'll be finished in no time and i have the money for college and that's already all set up and me and my b-f planed to have this baby because we are financially fit and we love eachother and. thats not what i needed advice with. the advice i needed was how to get my daughters dad to leave us alone.and me daughters father, yes i know was a mistake because we didnt love eachother and it was our first time and we were at a party and just didnt care. but i'm doing what i need to do and hes not. and me and my b-f are getting married but we want a big wedding and that takes time to plan. and i want to have the wedding after i have our baby. so thanks anyways.. alicia

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thank you for ur advice and i know what ur saying because i'de probally give the same advice, but thats not an option with this guy, the other guy was a mistake and i new that right away.but me and this guy have known eachother for a while and we're happy and in love.but thank you again. back to the advice i do need though. how to get my daughters father to stop with all the threats.

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You may be able to get a restraing order on your old boyfriend. If he was physically abusive towards you in the past, I'm pretty sure you can get one. Even if he wasn't if he is harassing you now, I'm sure there is something you can do. Your still young so you definitely should be more careful. I'm not saying quit having sex but there are a lot of ways you can protect yourself from getting pregnant. The Pill, Condoms etc. I would highly recommend birth control you really dont need anymore kids. Thats great that you want to get married just make sure you know what your getting yourself into. Like I said you're only 16 there is still a lot of stuff you may want to see and experience and with two kids, and a husband at age 16 that kind of limits your options for some time. Please recognize the fact that you are young though and their are other people that may now what is best for you like your MOM and DAD. Listen to them. YOu may not want to but Trust me there are looking out for you best interests and you'll realize that is a few years. Good LUCK!

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