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I MET MY HUSBAND DEC 01 IN KOREA. WE ONLY SPENT 1 MONTH TOGETHER AND THEN HE HAD TO MOVE TO HAWAII (THOSE IN THE MILITARY KNOW EXACTLY WHAT IM SAYING!) HE PROPOSED TO ME B4 HE LEFT. WE WERE AND ARE SO IN LOVE. I REALLY JUST KNEW HE WAS IT! IT WAS AMAZING. I VISITED HIM IN JUNE AND WE GOT MARRIED. I HAD TO GO BACK TO KOREA IN JULY AND NOW ITS FEBRUARY.........DAMN 14 MONTHS APPART. IM HERE TILL THE END OF JUNE.........DYING TO GET OUT OF THE MILITARY. WE TALK EVERYDAY WITH A WEB CAM. ITS JUST SO HARD TO UNDERSTAND HIM SOMETIMES. HE DOESNT GIVE ANTHING TO THE CONVERSATIONS I START BESIDSES OHH AND YEAH.........THATS NOT ENUF! HIS LIFE IS CARS, FISHING AND HUNTING AND ME. ( LIKE WHEN I READ HIM THE POETRY I OR WHEN I GET UPSET HE DOESNT KNOW WHAT TO SAY)ITS LIKE HE NEVER KNOWS WHAT TO SAY. HE LACK OF UNDERSTANDING ANYTHING EMOTIONAL IS MAKING IT THAT MUCH HARDER. HE IS FROM ALABAMA.......SO ITS WORSE, HE IS A TOUGH DUDE. I AM A DEEP PERSON AND HE JUST DOESNT GET ME.......I DONT KNOW HOW TO MAKE HIM GET ME!! ITS SO F'ING DEPRESSING. IM SO SICK OF BEING APPART. AND I HATE THAT I CANT UNDERSTAND THIS GREAT GUY OF MINE. I WISH THERE WAS AN ANSWER TO THIS.

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Quick point before the meat of my reply: Please don't type in all caps. It makes it harder to get your point accross because reading it feels like getting screamed at!

 

Okay, now that my nagging is done...

 

First of all, I don't think a marriage proposal after only one month is such a great idea. It seems like you were immediately taken by his charm, and were rightfully excited about it. But, later on, you found out that he didn't share your views on romance, and wasn't an exceedingly deep conversationalist. Granted, lots of men are like that, and the women in their lives are perfectly happy with them. But it sounds to me like you want someone as deep and romantic as yourself. You'll find it frustrating and detrimental to your emotional well-being if you stick with this guy, trying to change him. That's an evil seed that can only cause pain and damage to your relationship. I understand how exciting it is to feel yourself falling in love, but if you don't come out and tell him how important it is to you to have deep, philosophical conversations, he'll never change. And even if you do tell him, he still might not. If your man can't give you what you so clearly desire, you're better off finding another one.

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