why does it hurt so much?

me and my boyfriend broke up on sunday... we were going out for a year and a half. we have been through everything!! he was all i had and all i still have. i keep crying and crying over him.. and i just wonder if he is doing the same? and if he will ever call me and come back to me? we broke up for NO reason.. he just stopped calling and strated ignoring me...for NO reason...i don't know what to do.. why does this hurt soo much when i did nothing wrong!! i didnt deserve to be dumped.. i dont know what to do ???

You should talk to your bf/ex and ask him to be honest with you so that you can move ahead in your life. Ask him what lead him to end your relationship. You do deserve an explination. You need understading and closure and you have a right to get it. Tell him that you wish he would have communicated things with you rather than jump to a decision. Relationships take a lot of work...maybe he isn't ready to take the responsibility. I would ask him some questions and see where that leads you...maybe you guys can work things out in the end...

Hi,

Yeah, Mermayd's comments and suggestions are excellent. But, I am somewhat rebelling against Mermayd today... *grins*. I have a slight different point of view, probably because I know 'guys' (I can safely say that I am!).

The problem with guys is that in general guys have more difficulties expressing themselves. In general they don't know how to express their feelings or their needs. That's situation is very troubling when things in a relation come down to emotions and feelings. Guys tend to collapse and fall quiet.

Now, knowing this it is kinda risky to contact your bf/ex, because it can go two ways:

1) He will start to express himself, because you asked him to do so.

2) He will totally blow you off and blow your mind.

In the first situation you might even end up getting together again. But... the risks are high, because of the second situation, in which you might be left behind very hurt, even more hurt than you feel right now.

I hope this helps you to make the right decision. Good luck!!!

~ SwingFox ~

I wish I knew why it hurts so much not to be with him. I guess it is easier for the person that breaks up with you. He is already dating someone else and it hurts so much, because I wish I was the person still with him, holding his hand kissing him, but that can not be any longer. He is gone from my life and I have to learn how to deal with that. I have tried so hard to win him back but the only thing I have done is just push him away from me. It really hurts not to have him, not to look into his eyes and tell him that I love him. I acted like a psycho bitch for a while, but that was not my intent, I was just trying to keep from losing someone so special to me, when the answer was there the whole time. The answer was and is love.

I should of have listen to what he said when he decide to break it up, but I didn't want to listen I just wanted to hear what I wanted to hear.

I find some comfort in a passage from the Bible in Cointhians 13

If I speak in the tongues of men and angles, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all knowledge , and if I have faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give away all I have, and I deliver my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing.

Love is patient and kind; love is not jealous or boastful;its not arrogant or rude. Love does not inist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrong, but rejoices in the right. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

Love never ends;as prophecies , they will pass away; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away. For our knowledge is imperfect and our prophecy is imperfect; but when the perfect comes, the imperfect will pass away. When I was a child, I spoke as child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child, when I became a man, I gave up my childish ways. For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall understand fully, even as I have fully understood. So faith, hope, love abide, these three, but the greatest of these is LOVE.

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I know that right at this moment they are together, he has traded me in for someone new, and it hurts really bad, but I do love him deeply and now I realize that all I want is for him to be HAPPY, even if its not with me, It hurts so bad and it should not. It hurts as if someone has taken my heart from my body and left me bleeding to death. I know that it should not hurt like this if I love him the way that I said that I do. I only wish him happiness and I know I have to let go somehow.

Good bye my baby, I will always love you......