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Okay theres this guy I have known for 2 years. Just recently weve kinda had a "relationship." Somewhere in the last month he told me to keep my distance because he needed time to figure some things out. Everything that he needs to figure out is about me and his ex. He tells me he loves me and wants to spend the rest of his life with me, yet he loves his ex girlfriend, not necessarily because he wants to be with her, but because everything they have been through. I mean I know that in some weird way I still care for my ex, but Its not something that gets in the way. I don't see why his ex needs to either. But what I don't understand is, if he didn't want her in some way, then why is he putting our relationship on hold? Please Help.

 

Thanks

Jennifer

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You bring up some valid points. I just got an issue resloved between my bf and I because I felt like he was thinking about his ex more than what made me comfortable. But if you love this guy, you should respect what he is asking. Understand that he is just trying to sort things out. Your experiences are different from his so maybe that is why you feel differently about your ex than he does about his. That is a lesson I learned in my recent situation. Maybe he has to recollect on why he is NOT in that relationship anymore in order to appreciate YOU. If it becomes too much of a problem, maybe you should consider leaving if he is dwelling too much. But before you jusmp to any conclusions with yourself, you need to discuss this with him and express your concern about the situation.

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Hi,

 

Hmmm... love is a crazy little thing, you know. Some people get seriously hurt, some people even get depressed when the one they love is breaking up. I haven't seen details on what happened with your guy, but may be his ex has been treating him really unfair, who knows.

 

I hope he that despite his confusion, he is not pushing you away. If he is, it's really up to you to what level you find that acceptable. I suggest that you keep talking to him about how you feel. It's only fair for him to take your feelings into account, no matter what he is going through. If at some point you can't take it anymore, may be it might be time to go your separate ways.

 

At the same time I also advice you to ask him to reassure you once a while. I would LOVE a woman asking me that. Why? Because if a woman asks me that, it shows that she needs me. I would definitely pamper any woman asking me to reassure them... *grins*. That's just silly me. Last but not least, show him you care by pampering him. Tell him that you love him so much and why. Be as specific as possible.

 

I hope this helped some. Good luck!

 

~ SwingFox ~

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