Dealing With My Husband's Crazy Ex-Girlfriend

My husband and I have been married for 6 years and we have been together for 8 1/2 years. When we met we fell completely in love, it was love at first sight. I knew that he had recently gotten out of what I call a twisted relationship with his ex-girlfriend. They had been broken up for sometime maybe about a year and a half but he was still sleeping with her because it was convenient. They have 2 children together which from what I have been told she purposely got pregnant with because she knew that he did not want any more children. When we met his youngest child was only a baby, she was conceived while they were broken up but while he was still sleeping with her. She tricked him and said that she had gotten fixed and could not have any more children. From day one and I do mean that literally, I have had nothing but problems from her. She always puts the kids in the middle of everything and plays them against my husband and myself. I am a great stepmother and everyone tells me that I am and she uses that against me. She constantly tells me that the children do not like me and that they say that I am mean to them which is not true at all. I love them very very much and I treat them as if they were my own and as a matter of fact evertime we are out as a family everyone thinks that they are our children because I do not treat them any different. I am unable to have children and she knows this and uses it against me by saying things like you do not have kids and these are our children you would not understand. She calls our home and talks to my husband any kind of way and threatens him that he can not see his children. We then argue (He and I) because I tell him that he should not let her talk to him any kind of way. She is always telling me that she has secrets on him and that she will tell it and i don't know if she is bluffing or if she really does because before we got married she said the same thing over and over again and one day when she got really upset she told me that they had slept together. When I confronted my husband with this he yelled out to her and me that she was lying. I begged him to tell me the truth ad promised him that I would not leave him and finally he came clean ad told me that he had slept with her while we were togeter. I was so hurt but I did not leave him. And recently she said the same thing about having a secret and that if he did not call her that she was going to tell me something that he did not want me to know. I t told him what she said and then one day out of the blue she told me that he had called her the next day from a pay phone while he was on his way to church with the children, which was one morning that I did not go to church and when I asked him about it he admitted it but could not still to this day give me a reason why. She now still says the same thing and I don't know what to believe. She is not allowed to call our home and he does not really seem to understand why. Sometimes I feel that he is still in love with her but he says that he is not and that he only loves me, what do I do.

This is a tough situation and I know someone out there will have more advice to give than I do. Or I hope so. You cannot really ask him to not have any contact with her because the childeren are involved, and apparently, she knows this and uses it to her advantage. I honestly dont know what I would do about this woman, she seems very deceiteful and evil from what you say. I dont know if you need to be concerned about your husband still being in love with her, it sounds like he is speaking with her to stop her from spilling the beans or something. And that the only reall common bond he shares with her is the fact that they share children. I would sit down with your husband one night and explain this frustration you have to him. I would also tell him that you will try as hard as you can to not become angry or upset and rather respect his honesty, but you want him to come completely clean with everything. that way, she cannot use those threats against you, because you will already know. He probably is withholding information from you because he is afraid you will get upset with him or even leave him. tell him that you are giving him this chance to come clean and that you may be dissappointed for a few days or so but that you will dwell more on the fact that he was honest with you and try to be content with that. I think that would be a good start. Good luck, hun!