I have a big problem I need to work on.
Any advice or thoughts you have on the subject will be greatly appreciated.
I am extremely jealous of my boyfriend's past relationships.
He has lots of experience - you name it, he's done it, with as many people as possible.
Also, he had an "arrangement" with an ex-girlfriend, after they had already broken up, where they would get together for sex whenever they could.
By the way, given how clingy this girl was and how badly she took it when they broke up, this shows very bad judgement on his part I think. No matter how horny you are, it is not a good idea to keep having sex with someone who is still in love with you. It doesn't seem fair to the girl, it probably confused her alot.
But back to my problem.
I can't stop thinking about his past.
I react emotionally as though he cheated on me even though he clearly did nothing wrong to me.
For example, I keep thinking now, in retrospect, about when we first met. We got together - I think we both suspected this may lead to something romantic - but nothing was clearly stated. Nothing romantic, we didn't even kiss.
A day after meeting with me like this, he went and slept with this ex girlfriend.
I KNOW he had no obligation to me at that time. So why do I always remember it and let it bother me?
Similarly, I find myself judging him harshly for sleeping around so much. I believe there is nothing morally wrong with that, as long as you don't lie to anyone, and sexual experimentation can be a wonderful thing.
So why am I so terribly jealous??
It must be me, my own insecurities. And THAT is what I need help with.
I have no idea how to become more secure, and stop thinking about my boyfriend's past.
He never lied or cheated, not to me, not to anyone as far as I know. All the poor guy ever did was sow his wild oats...