4 years and a quick "goodbye".

Hi,

I have a story to tell, and some advice to ask, I don't intend this to be a long post so i'm sorry if it is. I feel I need to talk to someone but don't know who so I lay my story on this board for both myself and anyone who wants to read it.

4 years ago I was a senior in high-school, I was just finishing and met a wonderful woman L . As with everyone I felt like I was the luckiest guy in the world L respected me, my business and how much time I had to devote to work and college (university). This all lasted for 2 years then suddenly one night when we were driving down a town road she hit me with the "I need some space" speech. Of course, I was upset, I even begged her to stay with me but she didn't, she left.

After this we remained "friends" for about a week until we had a disagreement and we called it off and we did not speak to each other. I removed all of her photo's etc from my house and even removed her "un-memorized" phone number from my book and cell phone. This hurt like heck, but I moved on, I met a nice girl at the office (at the time I was senior programmer (go figure eh)) and started to spend some time with her.

Then, 3 weeks later my ex called me out of the blue and told me she wanted me back and that she had made a terrible mistake. Being freshly out of the relationship I quickly left the girl I was seeing and jumped back on the saddle with L again.

We have since been going out what I thought was "happily" for 2 more years, when just last week she pulled me asside and said to me that "I worked to much and wasn't romantic enough for her" and left me. Then every day after she has called me up and said she wanted to be friends with me, asking me what I have been upto and telling me about her day. Of course it's not just her, I have been the culpret as well, calling her up and asking the same questions. The only problem is that I don't agree with her reason, should I? I don't know, is it my right to even question her? every time she calls or I call her I feel releieved, it brings an hour or two of happiness to my life again before the constant depression and moping around the house starts.

Whats the best course of action for me? even if she said she wanted me back I don't know if I could accept her back, will this keep happening? is this a "trend" once every 2 years she'll leave me?

Any advice or just conversation about this would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks.

Losing someone with no explanation only to try again can cause some anxiety.

The first step that you should take is to softly demand an explanation for her actions before that ended the relationship.

Then you should try re-courting together and take your time getting to know one another again.

If you feel that her reason was not solid enough or that she may surely repeat what she did to you. Then you might want to reconsider reuniting with her.

Take your time, think this out, and make the right decision.

Thanks for the advice.

I'm working through this now every day it seems to be getting that little easier, just that little bit better, some days I just wish I could bounce out of bed and say "what a great day", but im sure down the track I will be able to do that, just not right now.

Were going out to lunch today. I don't expect it to change anything though, it's been 2 weeks already, I guess I just want to see her face again before I take everything down for the last time.

I believe the relationship as it was before is over now. The worst thing is that I have been thinking about that office girl J lately, I can only think about how much I hurt her now how she must have felt, I talked to her a while afterwards (2 years ago) and I got the cold shoulder, oh well, how some experiences somber us all. I was considering going round to J's house and saying sorry at some point, but I think it would only hurt her again. oh well.

Sorry im just typing here.. you probably don't want to know, but it's nice to just be able to put everything into words, it seems to make everything a bit easier and/or clearer to think about. I think i'll just use this board as my personal sounding post, if reading about it helps others, good I know guys have feelings and we need help as much if not more then some of the ladies do. Good luck to anyone who reads this board, we're all your friends here, and we all understand. We know what your going through and were here even if it's just to share sad stories.

Thanks for listening.