Facebook share
LinkedIn share
Google plus share
Twitter plus share
Give Advice
Ask For Advice
Results 1 to 4 of 4

Thread: What a mess

  1. #1
    Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2002
    Location
    Korea
    Posts
    3

    What a mess

    I have been dating a girl who is married for the last 4 years, we have been living in sin the entire time. We were so happy and both decided to never hold what was happening against either of us. Well after 4 years of being together she decided finally that it was time to break it off with her husband. She called me up and told me that she was on her way to his house to have him sign the papers, after about 5 hours she calls me back crying and telling me that she and i need a few week apart in order for her to get her feelings together. In the past we have always talked about becoming married and having kids and living to become old together, it was so picture perfect, except for the fact that she was married. Well my point is that now that i have molded my life around this woman for the last 4 years and she means the world to me, she just shut me out in the dark to see if she can repair her marriage. He doesnt know about me, and i am just totaly confused on what i should feel. I am in a totaly different country then her for my work and i am going crazy. She told me she just needed a couple of weeks to see how they would be together again, she told me not to wait for her but i know she wants me there if it doesnt work between them, what should i do. I love her and she is everything to me, i believe that she needs me and is just scared to admit it.

  2. #2
    Member Lightingbird's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2002
    Location
    USA
    Posts
    188
    Gender
    Male

    Dating a married woman.

    To chose to date a woman that has another is to ask for hardship, pain, risk diease, endure nights and holidays alone, and irreversible amounts of bad memories.

    Look around you....

    Do you see all the married, committed and dating couples? They don't have any of those factors.

    Just him and her.

    In your head you know the right thing to do, you need to follow it. Its time to live for yourself and not wait for another.

    Stop wondering if someone needs you when they have someone, because the cold truth is....

    They don't.

    Do the right thing, move on and start anew.
    Good luck to you.

  3. #3
    Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2002
    Location
    United Kingdom
    Posts
    4
    It sounds to me that she is not ready to leave her husband and this is always the problem you have when anyone gets involved with a married person. At the end of the day, forbidden fruit provides risk which can be exciting and fun (although I don't condone afffairs because they are painful but it is the danger of being caught and doing what you shouldn't that is exciting)
    unfortunately this is no longer the case because the forbidden fruit is proposing turning into a serious relationship which is bound to loose the edge.
    Also she has to make a choice and maybe she didn't want to ever make a choice, at the end of the day leaving a marriage no matter how unhappy you are is hard to do and it sounds like she is not ready to leave the marriage and probably won't ever be ready to.
    You should also ask yourself - if she was so willing to be unfaithful to husband number one then what makes you think she will stay faithful to you as well?

    Think about it, and forget about it, extra marital affairs almost always lead to heartache for all parties concerned.

  4. #4
    Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2002
    Location
    Korea
    Posts
    3

    The element of suprise

    Ok not sure if anyone anyone reading this knows my situation, but you can refer back to, What a Mess".(under breakups) Well if so here is my latest and greatest plan, it has been a month now since she has left me, and still wears my engagement ring, we talk every so often, and she still tells me she loves and misses me but she keeps saying that we wont work, (why i dint know). Well in January i am going to get on a plane, get my butt back to AZ for 2 weeks. The day i get back i am having a friend bring her to our favorite bar, and i am going to show up totally unexpectedly,with a few roses, a teddy bear, a big red bow on my head and tell her, "Baby, Merry Christmas, and Happy New Year, so sorry im late, Santa forgot me, I love you." Im hoping for the best but eiter way i need to get my stuff back from her and i will finally be able to sit and talk to her face to face. I am so excited to do this i cant even sleep at night, its sucks but i cant wait, well let me know what you think, if you want to talk about it and have some good info for me IM me on AOL. Well hope to see some of you soon, Bye bye, ~Jim

  5.  


Give Advice
Ask For Advice

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •