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What if I never would have found the e-mails?


e3m5

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I was with my boyfriend for 9 months. Last week I was selling an item for him on ebay. He had some e-mail trouble so I tried fixing it. I noticed he had a registed e-mail address he never mentioned. So I hacked into it . I know it was wrong but I was not expecting to find anything bad. Well I found an e-mail with a picture of a girl and it had a phone number. I wrote to her so she could explain what that was about. She wrote back saying he never told her he was comitted. She is currently in Ecuador which means he called her there from (his job) in Miami. I confronted him and he made it seem like she was just a friend. But from the e-mails I can say it wasn't so. He was planning to meet up with her because she was coming to Miami for Thanksgiving.I broke up with him. He wants us to get back but I don't know what to do. What if I never would have found the e-mails? He says I am over reacting. What do you think??? Help!!!!

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mm.. i think yu should think about it again.. hey watt if yu would have done the same like him ..? watt would have been his reaction? did u think about that? if u would have never seen the emails would u ever come to know about it ?.. or would he ever tell u regarding it? mm..

its a bit hard to let go off.. hey r u still in love with him, if u r, then give him a second chance butt if u feel he has cheated u then let go of him and go ahead with yur lovely life dear ..

 

u got to make a decision and it has to be right plz..

 

take care..

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I was in a similar situation a few years ago, only I was the other girl. I had developed an online relationship with a man in another country. We had talked online for about 18 months. Long story short, I got a phone call from his WIFE. I had no idea he was married!

The way I see it is, if you had an open honest relationship with your boyfriend, you would have already known about this "friend", if that truly was the crux of the relationship with this girl. There was a reason he never disclosed this relationship to you. If your gut tells you there's something amiss, it's probably right.

If you can work it out, great, but I would say there needs to be some ground rules before trust is regained. - Just my opinion - Good luck.

 

hourglass

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The more I think about it, On-line affairs really mean nothing to the worth of an individual. Think of it as a passion that he was exploring. It shouldn't really mean that much to him...how is his impulse control in general? Is he a heavy drinker or an over-achiever, workaholic? He probably has some form of ADD. Since you are thinking of getting together with him again, you may be able to ask him to seek counseling for his addictions. Take him back, that is my vote! When the hurt and embarrassment wears off he and you will be much the better off together -- keep searching his e-mails until your curiosity goes away. The truth is he may have been attracted to her but it was a meaningless attraction. It meant nothing to him or her. The clothes that we wear don't dictate the type of person that we really are. Look for a deeper meaning to all of this. Count it as a meaningless attraction and flirtation--nothing more!

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