I moved off to college and everything went down hill.

Two summers ago I met the girl of my dreams, and we became pretty good friends. It wasn't until next summer that we ssaid we were ready to go out (in July). I was going off to my first year of college and she was going to be a senior in high school. We were both in love and I thought she was perfect for me. We both agreed that this would be hard, but we could get through it. But only a month into it (September 25th to be exact), I got an instant message that said call me as soon as you get home. So I called her up and she said that we should be just friends again, cause it was better like that. She explained she still loved me (and I still love her soooo much), but said she had too much pressure going on in her life. She said that the pressure of grades, parents, and looking at what she wants to do next year, along with her grandma in bad health in Germany, that it was getting to complicated for her. So I still keep in touch with her and we both agree that we can get past this "test", but I am really worried. I really love her, and feel like I am so close to losing the perfect woman. What can I do to make it all better? (I have told her already that I will always be there for her and that I will always love her. I have also sent her my greatest support for her grandma.) What more can I do, is all there to do is wait? Will things maybe go back to "normal" or at least get better when I go back to see her next weekend?

Thanks for your advice,

Tony

Hi TonyV. I've been in a situation like this myself. I was dating a girl in high school who was 1 year behind me. When I went to school, we went from a "normal" great relationship to a weird, codependent mess. She became so clingy and needy, it just destroyed our relationship. I personally feel that the step back you and this young woman have taken in the right idea for you. It seems like you're both in a very complicated sitaution with a lot of mitigating factors. Taking a step back and staying very close friends, I think, is a mature choice to make. If/when the situation changes in the future, you could try again.

You're both at a awkward (yeah, I can't spell) time in your life. The change from high school to college, late teens to early twenties; can be rough. Best of luck to you, I do see a possibilty for a great future for you and this woman.