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Thread: Confused... how does this happen.

  1. #1
    Member
    Join Date
    May 2002
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    Confused... how does this happen.

    Me and my girlfriend of a year and a half just broke up two weeks ago. Actually this is the third time we have broken up this summer but this time I think it's for good but I'm not real sure what happened. We had been living together for about a year then in May she decided she needed some space. The next week I moved out. We stayed broke up for 2 weeks and she called me everyday 2 and 3 times a day during that time. We got back together in mid-May and got in one argument and she broke it off again. This was after a week of being back together. We continued to talk every 2 or 3 days then eventually got back together in July. One week before we broke up she was telling her friends and coworkers how much she realized she loved me while we were broke up and what a wonderful guy I am and how lucky she is to have me. We were talking about moving in together and getting married again and I thought everything was great. We both felt really good about us being back together. Then one Friday we break up. At first she says it was my insecurities about our relationship and that I needed to work on myself by myself before I could be in a relationship. But now she straight up says we aren't meant for each other and that she felt chlostrophobic and trapped and she doesn't want to be tied down and wants to go out and do things she never did before and that she couldn't do with me. I'll admit that I was a little insecure about the relationship and I definitely was working on that but when you've been dumped by the same chick 3 times in 3 months it's hard no to be insecure. I also know that I was insecure about the relationship because of the way she was acting in the last week or two of the relationship. She said things that kind of made me think I wasn't in her future. Now we don't talk at all hardly and she goes out and parties every night. What I don't get is how you can thank your lucky stars that I'm in your life one day then the next act like you hate me and won't talk to me. What gives.

  2. #2
    Silver Member Gilgamesh's Avatar
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    Feb 2003
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    Did someone tell you my life? i just went through very similar situation.
    i had 4 years, no breakups, no arguments, and everything was very romantic and passionate between us , complete with marriage plans and having children plans. then she decided "i guess i never really loved you".

    now when some woman leaves a good man, they do realize this and makes them uncomfortable with themselves, so somtimes they return, sometimes they even try to convince themselfs how great you are. but what usually happens is they will look for an excuse any excuse to break up with ya and the have something to justify there actions.

    this doesnt mean you did something wrong, the problem is with her, dont try and "cure" her or convince her how great you are.

    forget about her, start the healing process. its hard, i know, im going through it right now! and im sure you heard it a hundred times already that you will get over it, and find someone special, the weird thing is you know its true, but you dont feel it, but its true.

    the sooner you put her behind you the sooner you can get on with your life. when you stop calling, she will probably try and contact with you and make up again, dont! say, oh im sorry, im to busy or something. dont be tempted!


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