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Thread: His family is still friends with ex

  1. #1
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    His family is still friends with ex

    Hi all, If you’ve been reading my posts you all know that I like to read too much into social media. I can’t help myself. My boyfriend and I have been together for 6 months. We’re Facebook official, and Everyone knows that we’re together. However, I happened to look on his ex girlfriends page and I can see that both of his sisters are still friends with her. They’ll comment on her posts telling her she’s beautiful, wishing her a happy birthday. My boyfriend isnt friends with her on social media, he’ll only talk of her occasionally, if the topic arises. He’s also told me that he used to think he loved his ex but he didn’t. He’s also said his relationship with her taught him everything he didn’t want in a girlfriend, although it wasn’t a completely terrible relationship. This relationship ended 3 years ago. Besides me being in the wrong and checking out her Facebook profile, is it wrong of me to worry that his sisters appear to be close to her? I haven’t met his family yet.

  2. #2
    Platinum Member SarahLancaster's Avatar
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    After 6 months, I would expect you to have met his family. Why hasn't that happened yet?

    There's no point worrying about his sisters being friends with his ex. They have every right to interact with her and like her and think she's beautiful. That has nothing to do with you. Stop checking her page.

    If your boyfriend doesn't seem still attached to the ex, there's no reason for you to worry.

  3. #3
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Don't worry about it. He has no control over who his sisters choose to be FB friends with.

  4. #4
    Platinum Member melancholy123's Avatar
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    Good grief, get a grip! So what if his sisters are friends with her? What does it matter? How does it affect you and your life?

    I stayed friends with my brother's ex wife when they broke up and we were friends for like 30 yrs until she died. She was the sister I never had. So what? I think you are being ridiculous.

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  6. #5
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    You guys are right I am over reacting.

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    Originally Posted by melancholy123
    Good grief, get a grip! So what if his sisters are friends with her? What does it matter? How does it affect you and your life?

    I stayed friends with my brother's ex wife when they broke up and we were friends for like 30 yrs until she died. She was the sister I never had. So what? I think you are being ridiculous.
    I agree!

    OP, there must be more important things to worry about. Stop looking at her social media.

  8. #7
    Platinum Member Rose Mosse's Avatar
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    I'd think about this a bit more rather than brushing it aside especially if it keeps coming up.

    Why does your boyfriend mention his ex at all?

    Regarding exes, it's best not to compete with the past. This part here stands out to me because it suggests that you may feel intimidated if he loved her or cared a lot for her. If you are insecure or uncomfortable with the fact that he's ever loved someone else aside from you I think you need to address this also because it's unrealistic to believe or expect people not to have loved anyone else before you. It also means you're not respecting that he's had a life before you. This is a dealbreaker to me and I'd question whether the relationship is worth pursuing because it undermines a lot of autonomy, respect and appreciation for a whole person including all the parts before they ever came into your life.

    He’s also told me that he used to think he loved his ex but he didn’t. He’s also said his relationship with her taught him everything he didn’t want in a girlfriend, although it wasn’t a completely terrible relationship. This relationship ended 3 years ago.

  9. #8
    Platinum Member Jibralta's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by mayflower165
    This relationship ended 3 years ago. Besides me being in the wrong and checking out her Facebook profile, is it wrong of me to worry that his sisters appear to be close to her? I haven’t met his family yet.
    I don't know if it's wrong, but it certainly isn't doing you any good. I also don't necessarily think that them being friends with her is a red flag or anything like that.

    Have you talked to him about meeting his family? Has he met yours?

  10. #9
    Platinum Member DancingFool's Avatar
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    You don't control who his sisters like or choose to be friends with. It's absolutely none of your business.

    Please stop stalking his ex from 3 years ago and get your head screwed on straight. Your behavior is way more abnormal than just "over thinking" or "reading too much into social media".

  11. #10
    Platinum Member catfeeder's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by mayflower165
    I like to read too much into social media. I can’t help myself.
    Change the word "can't" to "won't" for accuracy.

    Then make a better choice.


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