Facebook share
LinkedIn share
Google plus share
Twitter plus share
Give Advice
Ask For Advice
Page 3 of 5 FirstFirst 12345 LastLast
Results 21 to 30 of 46

Thread: Sad, scared, depressed and need help thinking this through

  1. #21
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2016
    Location
    Cloud Nine
    Posts
    40,606
    Gender
    Male
    Can all the moving and worries wait another 6 weeks until your inheritance comes in? This way you'll be free to make your own choices and have time to look for a suitable, affordable apt for yourself without worries about family, privacy, co-owning, roommates and i other concerns. Start looking for apts, other types of rental etc. for Jan. Was the money from your half of the divorce home sales saved?
    Originally Posted by janut1
    until I get my inheritance, which will be here in January, fingers crossed

  2. #22
    Platinum Member DancingFool's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2013
    Location
    Wilds of Texas
    Posts
    11,307
    Gender
    Female
    Originally Posted by janut1
    She started dating someone a year ago, but he lives with his parents as well LOL He is a nice guy and is not moving with her, She is not ready for that and I know because she has told me time and time again. She likes her space. They have no place to be alone and I think that is bothering her.

    I told her that I would love it if she waited until after the new year, but she has her mind set.

    I'm actually happy for her that she can actually buy a home on her own. Its a great stepping stone for someone her age.
    Yes, only thanks to you paying half the rent and therefore helping her save up and putting her in that position and look at how she is paying you back for that....
    I wouldn't treat a random stranger off the street the way she is treating you.

    You are afraid of possibly living with strangers......consider that many strangers might be a million times kinder and more decent to you.

    A family friend met a nice woman while volunteering. They are both older and single and super happy living together. They actually decided to do that because they are both getting up there and are in the same boat in terms of having little family. They also have similar interests, habits, living habits and so on. They wouldn't trade their arrangement for the world and actually feel much safer and more comfortable living together than living alone. They often joke that they get along like long lost sisters without the sibling rivalry and fighting. Companionship aside, the other part of that is financial. They could live solo, but splitting the bills actually frees up funds for travel and being able to do more fun stuff they couldn't do otherwise. Point being - don't be closed off to different directions in life not just in the moment, but overall, in the long run.

  3. #23
    Platinum Member LaHermes's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2017
    Location
    Europe
    Posts
    2,495
    Gender
    Female
    Exactly DancingF.

    "Point being - don't be closed off to different directions in life not just in the moment, but overall, in the long run."

  4. #24
    Platinum Member Lambert's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2012
    Location
    N/A
    Posts
    3,078
    Originally Posted by janut1
    My friend has a nice apartment at a great rate in a high end location. She does not want to move and I dont blame her.

    I will get my name on that list - your right about that! I don't belong to a church right now, so thats not a option. There are places to post room rentals, so I will explore that after I have a move out date from her
    Can your friend get you into her building? have you thought about downsizing? what about the money you've been saving to put toward the house? can't you live off that until you get your inherentance?

    With that coming in January, could this just be a brief cash flow problem?

  5.  

  6. #25
    Gold Member janut1's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2014
    Posts
    708
    Gender
    Female
    Actually by the time escrow goes through I may have my inheritance. My mom passed away last year so this is from her estate. Without a job I could take some of that money and pay a full 6 months to a year of rent if that makes me qualify.

    Originally Posted by Wiseman2
    Can all the moving and worries wait another 6 weeks until your inheritance comes in? This way you'll be free to make your own choices and have time to look for a suitable, affordable apt for yourself without worries about family, privacy, co-owning, roommates and i other concerns. Start looking for apts, other types of rental etc. for Jan. Was the money from your half of the divorce home sales saved?

  7. #26
    Gold Member janut1's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2014
    Posts
    708
    Gender
    Female
    Sounds like an ideal situatiob DancingFool and that would work for me.

    Originally Posted by DancingFool
    Yes, only thanks to you paying half the rent and therefore helping her save up and putting her in that position and look at how she is paying you back for that....
    I wouldn't treat a random stranger off the street the way she is treating you.

    You are afraid of possibly living with strangers......consider that many strangers might be a million times kinder and more decent to you.

    A family friend met a nice woman while volunteering. They are both older and single and super happy living together. They actually decided to do that because they are both getting up there and are in the same boat in terms of having little family. They also have similar interests, habits, living habits and so on. They wouldn't trade their arrangement for the world and actually feel much safer and more comfortable living together than living alone. They often joke that they get along like long lost sisters without the sibling rivalry and fighting. Companionship aside, the other part of that is financial. They could live solo, but splitting the bills actually frees up funds for travel and being able to do more fun stuff they couldn't do otherwise. Point being - don't be closed off to different directions in life not just in the moment, but overall, in the long run.

  8. #27
    Platinum Member catfeeder's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    New Jersey
    Posts
    23,291
    Gender
    Female
    Originally Posted by janut1
    I just had my resume done by a professional. I will look into temp work. Didnít think of that. Thank you!
    Temping is wonderful. It's how I was able to find the 'real' jobs I wanted. The position you take doesn't matter as much as the relationships you build from within. From there, when a perm 'headcount' opens, you may be given the opportunity to write up the position you want for the person you want to work for--or otherwise apply for jobs from within that are never published to the public.

    Don't just send resumes to agencies--you need to contact them to set up an appointment for however they are interviewing these days. That's the only way to get on their active rosters for placement.

    Don't limit yourself to 1 or 2 agencies--they don't all service the same companies. Start with the radius closest to you and keep interviewing, 1 per day, at least 3 per week, until you've covered every conceivable agency--and then some.

    Once I ended up getting placed by the firm most far away from me that specialized in an industry where I had no experience. I didn't realize that they were that specialized, and so it was during the interview that we each realized that we had both made a mistake. But they were so kind and the partner even spent time with me. A month later after hearing crickets from ALL the agencies to which I'd applied, THEY are the ones who placed me--only 10 minutes from my home.

    After a lot of temping while working my master's at night, that fluke placement unfolded into a 14 year run and the best match of my life. Fingers crossed that I can hold onto it--everyone is suffering layoffs these days. You are in excellent company, and I'm holding you in my thoughts.

    All agencies will tell you that they have nothing at the moment. That's fine. No good agency has jobs lying around. The idea is to be on the active roster when the next match comes in. It doesn't need to be fabulous--it can be any spot with a good firm--no need to worry about being overqualified. Each placement gives you access to check out the culture and learn the possibilities.

    Write more if it helps, and I believe that we are all with you in spirit!

  9. #28
    Gold Member janut1's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2014
    Posts
    708
    Gender
    Female
    Just popping in to say Iím in and out of panic mode.She hasnít told me whatís happening yet but I heard her talking about the appraisal and loan docs needed. I feel like Iím on a roller coaster. Some days I feel like it will all be okay and others like today feel like Iím doomed. Iíve thought about roommates and that is still not my ideal as Iím such a introvert. But it may be the only solution until I get my inheritance. Iím looking at apts and of course they want income. But if I can pay 6 -12 months in advance they might allow me to move in. Iíve been applying to jobs. I had a interview on Saturday which I havenít heard back from yet. my ideal situation would be a place of my own. I like not having to worry about other peoples living habits or decisions which will affect my life.

  10. #29
    Platinum Member Rose Mosse's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2019
    Posts
    4,543
    That's great. How do you feel about the interview on Saturday? Did they mention when you might hear back from them?

  11. #30
    Gold Member janut1's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2014
    Posts
    708
    Gender
    Female
    I enjoyed the interview. He said he liked me but had 2 more people to meet. He said someone would reach out this week but nothing yet. Of course Iíd take it if itís offered to me..
    Originally Posted by Rose Mosse
    That's great. How do you feel about the interview on Saturday? Did they mention when you might hear back from them?

Page 3 of 5 FirstFirst 12345 LastLast

Videos


Maintaining A Strong Relationship

Detaching From a Malignant Man

Divorced Parents Prefer Technology and Social Media As Communication Tool

Wedding Jitters Could Be a Predictor for a Future Divorce

Botox Fights Depression And Makes You Feel Happier

Men Are More Sensitive than Women when Having Relationship Problems
Give Advice
Ask For Advice

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •