Facebook share
LinkedIn share
Google plus share
Twitter plus share
Give Advice
Ask For Advice
Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 12

Thread: Nephew's girlfriend

  1. #1

    Join Date
    Oct 2020
    Posts
    2

    Nephew's girlfriend

    Hey, looking for some input on this. my husband's nephew has a ex girlfriend who has been in the family since before I married my husband. She been around for over 10 years and we get alone well alone. He is like a big brother to her, their both in their early 30s and a bit immature. so she sent my husband some pics of her and her son and another friend out and about.she also sent one with her sitting on a bed with a skin tight low cut cleavage showing dress. Now I know my husband is not interested in her that way, and I don't see her as a threat. So my question is this: should I talk to my husband about setting bounties with her, and let him take care of it. Because this bothered me, and she crossed the line and I did not appreciate it. If I decide to speak with him how would I broach the subject? or do I let it go?

    Thanks

  2. #2
    Super Moderator HeartGoesOn's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Location
    Massachusetts
    Posts
    17,207
    Gender
    Female
    He should have enough respect for you to handle this in an adult way. I can only speak for myself, but he should take the lead himself without you offering any input.

    Either way, hopefully he'll make the right choices.

  3. #3
    Gold Member LikeWater's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2012
    Location
    This body
    Age
    31
    Posts
    699
    Gender
    Male
    If it bothers you, you just let him know that. It's weird, inappropriate, and messed up to be sending picture to someone she knows is married and she knows who he's married with. And you two were close but now she does this? It's just really weird and even if you know your husband wouldn't be unfaithful it still crosses your boundaries.

    Just approach the talk calmly and rationally and try to have a civil, nontoxic discussion. Your husband should at least understand where you're coming from and then you go from there. She's sending pics to her ex's uncle. I woulda made it clear with her to stop if I was your husband. It's just too weird.

  4. #4

    Join Date
    Oct 2020
    Posts
    2
    Thanks guys, appreciate it

  5.  

  6. #5
    Gold Member ShySoul's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2004
    Location
    Where love guides our hearts and actions
    Age
    37
    Posts
    5,324
    Gender
    Male
    I agree. It's inappropriate and he should be setting boundaries. If it bothers you, be honest and tell him. Your husband should be able to understand and want to do something about it.

  7. #6
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2016
    Location
    Cloud Nine
    Posts
    40,606
    Gender
    Male
    Are there other issues in your marriage that prompted you to go through his phone/messages?

    In itself it may be in bad taste o to send it, but you seem to think it's some sort of flirting or sexting between them?
    so she sent my husband some pics of her and her son and another friend out and about.she also sent one with her sitting on a bed with a skin tight low cut cleavage showing dress

  8. #7
    Platinum Member Lambert's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2012
    Location
    N/A
    Posts
    3,082
    Depending on how much time has passed, I would respond, as myself, on his phone. One, to let her know we share each other's phones. And two, to let her know its wrong to send sexy pics to a married man, her ex's uncle and my husband. Never be afraid to put your foot down and set a boundary. People know what they do. They just count on other's being too polite to call out bs.

    When you show you will call out bs, it is amazing how it stops. You don't have to be rude... A simple... "Hey. what's up with these sexy pics being sent to our phone? Is this your tinder pic?"

    Leave it on her to explain this poor behavior.

    Ps... You can always make it known your phones are linked and you get as all the same messages.

  9. #8
    Platinum Member lostandhurt's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Location
    California
    Age
    56
    Posts
    8,173
    Gender
    Male
    Did he show you the pics? Did you tell him when you saw that pic that you didn't like her sending that type of pic?

    If he sees her as a sister then he may not have given it much thought so if it bothers you don't expect him to read your mind. Just tell him you don't like her sending pics like that to him. The see what he says.

    This is not some test for your husband so let him know you didn't appreciate her sending that sexy pic and it makes you feel uncomfortable. Let him know how you feel and then work together for a solution.

    The same thing could go on with some guy at your work chatting you up and you think nothing of it but it bothers your husband.

    Lost

  10. #9
    Platinum Member smackie9's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2013
    Location
    Surrey BC, Canada
    Posts
    2,327
    Gender
    Female
    I think you got it right...talk to him about it and let him deal with it.

  11. #10
    Platinum Member catfeeder's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    New Jersey
    Posts
    23,293
    Gender
    Female
    How do you know about the pics?

Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast

Videos


Maintaining A Strong Relationship

Detaching From a Malignant Man

Divorced Parents Prefer Technology and Social Media As Communication Tool

Wedding Jitters Could Be a Predictor for a Future Divorce

Botox Fights Depression And Makes You Feel Happier

Men Are More Sensitive than Women when Having Relationship Problems
Give Advice
Ask For Advice

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •