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Thread: Falling for him and complicated

  1. #1
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    Falling for him and complicated

    Hi I meant this guy last month and we went out to eat. We were just hanging out and having conversation. I am 49 yrs old woman and he is 33yrs old. We had a good time. Anyway I had sex with him after we went out that day to eat. We have had sex a few times now. I have started to get feelings for him. He has made comments lately about that he is happy that I am into him. He doesn't want me having sex with anyone else. After the first time we were together he told me that I satisfied him and not to worry about him having sex with anyone else. Last time we were together he was more passionate about the sex. Played love songs on his guitar but made the comment under his breath about it being love songs and I didn't realize it. My problem is the last time we were together it was really good the kissing and sex. I heard him say under his breath that we could have something but I smoke cigarettesand also our age difference he was thinking out loud. He has smoked a cigarette with me a couple of times even though he doesn't like it. And this last time he kept asking me for cigarettes too. But then he was saying he didn't want anything serious to me and did not want to date because he thinks you can't ever please a woman. He said we were bonding. Not sure what to think but I have feeling for him. We have a lot in common too in our beliefs and views about life. Is he interested in more than sex and fun with me? Maybe I could change his mind? Getting Ready for a First Date

  2. #2
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    I wouldn’t go into this thinking you can change his mind. I honestly by his comments stating he doesn’t want anything serious would take his word for it. If a guy is interested he’ll be interested. He won’t say things such as he can’t pleas a woman. I would stop having sex with him if you want something more serious and find someone else with the same mindset as you.

    This guy is just in it for a good time.

  3. #3
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    I forgot to say that he seemed upset because he thinks I am in to him only for sex. I get what you are saying. Makes it hard to stop the sex now because I have feelings for him ugh.

  4. #4
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    Originally Posted by parisiangurl
    HI heard him say under his breath that we could have something but I smoke cigarettesand also our age difference he was thinking out loud. He has smoked a cigarette with me a couple of times even though he doesn't like it. And this last time he kept asking me for cigarettes too. But then he was saying he didn't want anything serious to me and did not want to date because he thinks you can't ever please a woman. He said we were bonding. Not sure what to think but I have feeling for him. We have a lot in common too in our beliefs and views about life. Is he interested in more than sex and fun with me? Maybe I could change his mind?
    Believe him when he says all of this.

    He's warning you that this isn't going to become a relationship.

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  6. #5
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    Then he shouldn't worry that I might be having sex with someone else. Sorry I am just feeling hurt and it's my fault. I have feelings for him way more than I should ugh

  7. #6
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    Originally Posted by parisiangurl
    Then he shouldn't worry that I might be having sex with someone else. Sorry I am just feeling hurt and it's my fault. I have feelings for him way more than I should ugh
    No, he shouldn't. But that's his ego talking. Unfortunately, it's not unusual.

    I would put a lot of distance between you and this guy.

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    Yeah apparently it's a big ego too. When he called me the last time I was waiting in line at the grocery store buying a soda. We got together right after and he seemed upset that I didn't buy him one and made a comment how it was just sex for me and that's why I didn't buy him one. I guess I need to decide to stop or not with him. He knows I have feelings I think but I will not go there after everything that was said obviously. It's just his ego again

  9. #8
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    Originally Posted by parisiangurl
    Yeah apparently it's a big ego too. When he called me the last time I was waiting in line at the grocery store buying a soda. We got together right after and he seemed upset that I didn't buy him one and made a comment how it was just sex for me and that's why I didn't buy him one. I guess I need to decide to stop or not with him. He knows I have feelings I think but I will not go there after everything that was said obviously. It's just his ego again
    Was he serious?

    He sounds manipulative, OP.

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    Yes he was serious. Was not joking.

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    Unfortunately, it's just hooking up, not a relationship. If you are both interested in that it's fine.

    You seem to enjoy the sex with him. Try not to think ahead or worry about the future.

    He is talking about exclusive sex. Perhaps that's a good idea for now.

    You can ignore whatever else he wants or talks about because this is just sex and hookups.

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