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Thread: Ex-boyfriend moved into a house with his Ex-wife

  1. #11
    Gold Member waffle's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2013
    suburban Detroit
    Originally Posted by Morleymew
    So I just left a really awesome guy, he has caring, loving and attentive to me. That was never the problem, the problem was that he lied from the very beginning about how involved his ex wife is in his life. I helped him pick a house to move into in my city - thinking we’d be moving in together. Instead he informs me that his ex-wife will be moving in. He didn’t consult with me, or made sure I was okay with it and made the decision behind my back.

    So not only did he lie to me, he deferred to his ex and actually took her side against me all the time. Needless to say, I broke it off pretty quickly.

    The worst part about this break up Is He kept showing up at my work, my apartment, my parents house to “get me back” and I almost fell For it . . .

    Anyway it was all very messed up... but how do I now feel like the bad guy? Did I overreact? Like honestly maybe this all wasn’t so bad. I’m very confused and sad. I miss him but I also know it was kind of a messed up situation.
    This is how it typically happens when you have the self-respect to not put up with this nonsense, they resort to full-chase mode.

    You absolutely, totally, 100% did the right thing. Do not second-guess yourself.

  2. #12
    Platinum Member catfeeder's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    New Jersey
    Originally Posted by Morleymew
    TThey were divorced. But he clearly was very connected with her. [...] I did meet her ...
    When someone is still involved with an ex, what should that tell you?

    Being positioned at all to meet her was another huge red flag.

    This isn't about blame, so quit that. It's about learning: do not to date men who are still involved with an ex. PERIOD.

    His opinions about you are manipulative and irrelevant. He never should have been in your life, so he doesn't get a vote.

  3. #13
    Oh dear...you will NEVER come first over his x. I lived this life for 10 years with a man who still loved his x. Please please do yourself a favor and detach yourself from it all. Please...you owe it to yourself to pull away. It will only get worse. There are too many people in your relationship. I'm free to chat !

  4. #14
    Yeah i see that now, there’s so much more to it too... like obviously I didn’t put the whole story on here. But yeah I told him all the time that I felt like a third wheel and his reply was always “you’re letting yourself feel that way” - it was rough. Obviously didn’t stay in the relationship long... yet I’m still upset over it!


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