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Thread: Should I try to get my ex boyfriend back?

  1. #1
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    Should I try to get my ex boyfriend back?

    Hello everyone one, me and my ex boyfriend have been dating for 3 years almost , and were close friends for 1 year before we got into relationship, however few weeks ago my bf decided to breakup with me, after he said we want different things in life and future, for example I'm outgoing and like traveling, and he prefers a quiet family, however he said nothing is wrong with me, and just love is not enough, I'm really confused and don't know should I be working on getting him back or just let him go, I also want to mention that he wanted to still be close friends, and he talk to me daily, I don't mind that but I'm still confused and think we can work this out as couples not just friends.
    Thanks for your patience, I'd appreciate any advice.

  2. #2
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    It doesn't sound like you are compatible, and that he has moved on. If he loved you, he would be with you.

    You need to stop giving him the benefit of a relationship by staying in contact. He can't have it both ways, plus it is too painful.

    You need to go no contact.

  3. #3
    Platinum Member Cherylyn's Avatar
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    No, don't try to get your ex boyfriend back. Your boyfriend made it very clear to you that he wished to breakup so he got what he wanted. He explained to you already that he wants different things in life and future such as a calmer, quiet family life whereas you prefer to see the world and you're outgoing. Your personalities and visions for the future are incompatible. He said love is not enough because he wants more. Both of you want different futures. Well then, accept that both of you are different and don't mesh.

    He's only willing to offer friendship. Either accept maintaining friendship with him or call it quits on the friendship if you want more such as being a couple again. He doesn't want to be a couple with you.

    Never grovel because that's pathetic and pitiful. Respect and honor his wishes and move on with your life. Find a guy who is outgoing and enjoys traveling. Then both of you will get along better. Be realistic.

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    Guys I'd like you to know that I tried no contact but he keeps reaching, he also mentioned that he is still sexually attracted to me, and wanted to be friends with benefits but I refused, however he still contacts and wants to be close friend with me even tho I didn't offer to be his friend, he made it clear that he still didn't move on, that's why I'm so confused

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  6. #5
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    Originally Posted by Mayo l22
    however few weeks ago my bf decided to breakup with me, after he said we want different things in life and future, for example I'm outgoing and like traveling, and he prefers a quiet family, however he said nothing is wrong with me, and just love is not enough, I'm really confused and don't know should I be working on getting him back
    In all sincerity, what could you really do to facilitate this?

    If you're fundamentally different people, would you really want to change who you are just so you don't lose him? I don't think he would want that, and it would likely lead to a lot of unhappiness down the road for you.

  7. #6
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    Ya that's what he said, but I know he is not happy with this , since he as I said wants to remain close friends, and other things that I mentioned

  8. #7
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    Originally Posted by Mayo l22
    Guys I'd like you to know that I tried no contact but he keeps reaching, he also mentioned that he is still sexually attracted to me, and wanted to be friends with benefits but I refused, however he still contacts and wants to be close friend with me even tho I didn't offer to be his friend, he made it clear that he still didn't move on, that's why I'm so confused
    Why haven't you blocked him?

    How lucky you are that he wants to keep you around for sex, but wants no commitment. Not! I would find that insulting.

    He clearly does not care about you, or your feelings.

    Friends do not treat one another this way.

  9. #8
    Platinum Member melancholy123's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Mayo l22
    Guys I'd like you to know that I tried no contact but he keeps reaching, he also mentioned that he is still sexually attracted to me, and wanted to be friends with benefits but I refused, however he still contacts and wants to be close friend with me even tho I didn't offer to be his friend, he made it clear that he still didn't move on, that's why I'm so confused
    Block and delete him NOW. Dont ever start FWB with him, it won't work. There's plenty of other guys out there who could be much better for you. Dont grovel, dont settle.

  10. #9
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    Guys I clearly didn't accept fwb, and he apologized and never mentioned it again, I'm telling you now that he is treating me really close, like if we are in relationship

  11. #10
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    You are not in a relationship. he does not want one. You need to block him!

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